


Dust Me Off

by Marium, omegabenny



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Age Difference, Anal Sex, Angst, Brief description of violence, Fluff, M/M, Mild Daddy Kink, Minor Character Death, Misunderstandings, Past Benny Lafitte/Andrea Kormos - Freeform, Past Child Abuse, Past Dean Winchester/Alastair - Freeform, Past Prostitution, Past Underage, Rimming, barely legal Dean, childhood traumas, more will be added though, really really minor tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-16
Updated: 2017-04-24
Packaged: 2018-07-24 09:18:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 49,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7502787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marium/pseuds/Marium, https://archiveofourown.org/users/omegabenny/pseuds/omegabenny
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean has had a rough life. With no one and nowhere to go to, and nothing but pain in his past, he goes wherever life takes him and does whatever he can to keep going.<br/>It's a coincidence that makes him meet Benny, a young man who quickly finds himself concerned with Dean's situation. Now, Benny is determined to win Dean's trust, and to help him find his second chance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is a roleplay by us that grew way too much more than we expected. Omegabenny (Floristbenny on tumblr) did Dean and had the initial idea, while I (Ocesjustafan on tumblr) did Benny. It's something we're both very fond of, so we hope that you like it! :)
> 
> The title is taken from a song by Julia Nunes, Stairwell.

_Hey, did you know that your number is written on a bathroom stall in the middle of nowhere in Louisiana? - DW_

_No idea, no. What do you mean exactly with middle of nowhere? And why are you texting, by the way? - BL_

_I dunno, I'm not from around here, I'm in the interstate somewhere in Louisiana, doesn't look like there's anything nearby. And I'm texting because I got curious. - DW_

_Thinking about it, I think I half-remember writing it there a few weeks ago when I was drunk, it's not too far from where I live. So there's your answer, a drunk doing drunk things. Can I ask you to erase it, please? - BL_

_Sure, not a problem. - DW_

_Done :) - DW_

_Thanks man. - BL_

_What's it like living nearby a truck stop with a giant chicken statue out front? - DW_

_Well you know, the same as any other town isolated from civilization. We got to drive for almost an hour if we want to buy anything other than the basics, we get a couple of months of tourists looking to clear their minds from the world. It's not bad if you're used to it. - BL_

_An hour? Jeez, no wonder the bus stopped there. - DW_

_You're going anywhere close? - BL_

_No real destination, just more like traveling. - DW_

_Congratulations, you chose a damn good place for it. Good luck finding anywhere to crash into. - BL_

_Not like I have any money anyway. - DW_

_But I got family nearby so it's good. - DW_

_Good for you then. Have a good stay, and thanks for erasing that. - BL_

_No problem, I've had my number in places I didn't want to before. DW_

_Something tells me there's a couple interesting stories there. - BL_

_Well, I got quite a few dick pics. - DW_

_Not like I was asking for details, but thanks for the honesty I guess. I suppose I got lucky it was you who found it and no one else. - BL_

_Hey, where did you say you were staying? Maybe it's nearby. - BL_

_The first motel I find, really. - DW_

_Didn't you say you would stay with some relatives? - BL_

_Turned out they had no rooms? - DW_

_Don't ask me, they're your family not mine. But must be a pretty shitty family if they don't have a room for you. Unless you once hooked up with your cousin or something like that. - BL_

_Dude, what the fuck. - DW_

_But it's fine, because I definitely have a place to stay. - DW_

_Calm down man, it was a joke. And if you say so I guess it's true. - BL_

_Look, I don't think this conversation is going anywhere anymore, so do you got anything to say or can I cut this off already? - BL_

_(...)_

_Hi again. Good night, hope you had a good day. - DW_

_Do you happen to know of any place I could stay for about 14 dollars? - DW_

_Guess whatever it was you were thinking of didn't work out, huh? - BL_

_That depends on where wxactly you are. Give me a name, if you're near this town I might be able to help you. - BL_

_Lucky Red's truck stop, Tetram. - DW_

_Not as much that it didn't work out as that I lied, sorry. - DW_

_We can talk about it later. It's half an hour away from here, I'm coming to pick you up and we'll see what we can do. I have a gun, so you better not try anything fishy. - BL_

_No, nothing fishy. I just need some help, promise. Thank you so much for coming to get me. - DW_

_Don't worry about it, no way I'm going to let anyone in the middle of the road at this hour of the night. Be there in half an hour. - BL_

_Thank you, I don't like the way some of these guys are looking at me. DW_

 

 

Exactly half an hour later, Benny parked his truck into the stop's parking lot and got out. He had no idea where this 'DW' person was, but he guessed the bar was the best place to start looking.

Making sure his gun was within easy reach, he walked into the place. He took his phone and typed: _'Just came through the door into the bar.'_. He looked up and saw a young man getting his phone.

Dean read the message and looked at the door from where he was sitting, in the corner booth. Oh. 'BL' was hot, and rather young. He was still older than himself, but young; Dean guessed he would be around 25. He didn't know how to feel about that.

He stood and carefully made his way to the man, watching for any indication that he planned on actually using the gun he'd said he had. Dean was taller than the man, but BL was clearly much more muscled.

“I, huh, hi” he greeted carefully.

Benny looked at the man – no, scratch that, the kid that had talked to him. He was far younger than he had imagined, much more now that he saw him this close, and looked so out of place in the loud bar as a nun on a heavy metal band.

He inspected him up to down, and his impression that he was probably telling the truth on their earlier conversation intensified. Relaxing a bit and turning his scowl into something softer, he offered his hand and a smile.

“Benny” he introduced himself.

Dean tried to offer a sincere smile back, but his effort fell short; he was too anxious and hungry to manage that quite yet.

“Nice to meet you, Benny. I'm Dean. Thanks again for this. I, em, I could give you the 14 bucks I've got, or maybe I could do something for you?”

Benny frowned sightly, noticing something off in the kid's behavior, but decided not to comment on it, at least not in that moment and place. His hand dropped, unshaked.

“Not doing it for money, Dean, I'm doing it out of the kindness of my heart” he said with an easy smile, patting his chest. “Now, if you trust me enough to get in my car, I'm gonna take you to my town. There's a bed and breakfast whose owner kind of owes me, so I could get you a bed to crash in. Only for tonight, though.”

Actually, this was much kinder than Benny had planned to be and than he usually was, but the boy was so obviously, utterly lost, and so young, almost a kid, that he couldn't think of doing anything else.

“Yeah, OK. Beggars can't be choosers, right?” Dean joked half-heartedly. “That sounds awesome, thank you.”

Benny's smile widened a bit. Then he noticed a few older men and a couple women over the kid's shoulder, leering at him, and he put his most menacing face on as he shifted sightly closer to him.

Dean noticed the change on Benny's face and turned to look at the people behind him. He turned back to Benny and waved a dismissive hand.

“Yeah, they've been staring for a long time. Let's just get outta here, huh?”

“I think that'll be best” Benny agreed. Once they were outside, he lifted his shirt a bit, just enough to show Dean his gun, and raised his eyebrow at him. Just in case. He walked to the truck and opened the passenger's door, gesturing for Dean to get in.

Dean hesitated for a moment, eyes lingering on the outline of Benny's gun under his shirt. It made him nervous to get in the car with the man, although he didn't plan on doing anything to anger him, and getting in the car meant a meal and a place to stay for the night for him. He pushed his anxiety to the side and hopped in the truck with a quiet thanks.

Benny got on the driver's seat, started the engine and drove away from the bar. He stayed in silence for a couple minutes, waiting to see if Dean said anything. When it was clear it wouldn't happen, he asked, without looking away from the road:

“So, do you want to talk about whatever happened to you?”

“Not really" Dean said as he shook his head, shifting uncomfortably in his seat and looking out the window.

“You're in your right not to. No pressure, kid” the other replied with a shrug. He hummed a bit, but other than that was silent again for some other minutes as he drove. Then, he spoke again: “What about your plans? Any idea of what you're gonna do in the near future?”

That made Dean scoff. “Dude, I'm lucky to know what I'm doing in one day. I gotta live in the present to make it to the future, you know? I'll figure something out."

Benny looked at the boy sideways and frowned, his lips sightly pursed. “So you don't have any idea of what you're going to do. I suppose that traveling around isn't a pleasure thing, then?”

“No, definitely not” Dean confirmed with a shake of his head. “Just can't stay in one place for too long, cause I can't exactly get the money I need in, you know, legal ways." He shrugged, looking down at his hands that were folded in his lap.

Benny's eyes widened a lot, his hands lost control of the wheel for a fraction of second, and he opened his mouth to say something, but, shaking his head, he decided that it most likely would make Dean shut on him.

"You know, I think there may be one or two jobs to take in town" he said slowly, unsurely, inspecting Dean out the corner of his eye. He wasn't sure what kind of illegal things Dean was refering to, the dangerous criminal one, or the 'I'm in desperate need' one. He fiercely hoped it was the second.

His words earned him a skeptical look from Dean.

"Yeah, and I'm sure they'll be chomping at the bit to hire me. You know, with no resume, no references, and an elusive background. Not to mention that even if someone did hire me, it'd probably be minimum wage and part time considering my age, and I can't live off that when that's only adding onto the 14 bucks I've got."

"Hey, it's a small town, we can't afford to be too selective.” Benny shrugged. “But it's your call, I was just letting you know.”

Dean crossed his arms. "I really appreciate your help, but the way I do things has worked well enough so far. It's not the worst thing in the world either, so I'm just gonna keep on doing what I'm doing."

“As I said, it's your call.”

Benny didn't say anything the rest of the way, and neither did Dean. Occassionally he would shoot quick glances at Dean.

“We're arriving” he announced when they got close. “We'll be there in less than five minutes.”

Dean nodded, watching their surroundings carefully. When they pulled into the parking lot, he turned to Benny, and said without hesitation:

"I'll give you a blowjob for 50 bucks."

As soon as he said it, Benny's head snapped violently towards Dean, and he stared at the younger one open-mouthed. It took him almost a minute to actually understand what Dean had just said.

“Out of the truck, now” he finally commanded in a low whisper that nevertheless gave no room for discussion, the first thought that crossed his mind. Immediately after came, ' _how fucked up is this poor kid?'_

Dean huffed but grabbed his duffle bag and hopped out of the truck. "A 'no' would've been fine, you know," he said, sticking his free hand in his jacket pocket. Benny cursed quietly and got out of the truck too, quickly going next to Dean.

“No, wait. Sorry, that came out too rough, but fuck, kid, how old did you say you were? Are you in that much need?”

Dean rolled his eyes at him and sneered, crossing his arms.

“I'm 18. I'm homeless, this duffle bag has literally every single one of my belongings, and when I said I had 14 dollars, I mean 14 dollars in cash is all I have to my name. There's no bank account or anything like that waiting for me to draw any money out of it. This is all I've got.”

Benny nodded slowly as he listened, concern obvious in his face. “Really screwed up, then. You got no family or friends, no one you can ask for help?”

“Don't you think I'd be, I don't know, with them if I did? Or do you think I enjoy living like this?” he asked, giving Benny a hard look and his voice turning harsh. Benny seemed taken aback by those words and looked down, sightly ashamed.

“Sorry, it was stupid of me to ask” he muttered quietly.

There were a few moments of silence and then he said in the same quiet tone: “Wait for a moment, I'm gonna make a call.” When he saw Dean nod, with his lips pursed, he got his phone and dialed.

“Lizzie? Hey, remember that time when I scared off that stalkerish ex of yours? Yeah, look, it would be great if you payed me the favor back now. I need a room for a few nights, we'll be there in a few minutes so get it ready while we get there, huh? Yeah, I know we said one, I'll pay the rest when we arrive.”

Dean's eyebrows furrowed. "Dude, you don't have to do that," he said, reaching for the phone. "I told you I'll be fine."

Moving away so Dean couldn't reach, Benny listened for a few more moments and then finished the call. He ignored what Dean had said and started walking.

“This way.”

Once again, Dean huffed, but followed Benny to the place. When, a few minutes later, they got there, he said quietly: “Thanks.”

“It's nothing” Benny replied, still feeling ashamed for what he had said before.

He went to Elizabeth, who was waiting for them, and talked to her quietly for a couple minutes as Dean watched awkwardly. After pointing to Dean behind him, Benny gave her some money and then turned to the boy.

“So, you got a week in here. The rooms are comfortable and the food is good” he commented scratching his nape. “I guess I'll see you around town one of these days, if you decide to stay, that is. So, em, good luck” he finished somewhat awkwardly.

“Hey, wait” Dean said quietly and quickly, grabbing Benny's forearm as this started to turn away. He paused, looked at his hands and then let go awkwardly. “Would you like to stay here with me for a while? I... I haven't properly talked to anyone in like, three weeks” he added, almost pleading.

Benny's eyebrows went up in surprise, but he hid it quickly and nodded, making an easy smile appear on his lips. He got the feeling that Dean wasn't the kind of person who enjoyed being pitied, so he guessed that the best way to help him was not to let too much show, so he would act relaxed and easy.

“I'm all ears. Tell me anything you want to share” he invited as he sat down in the guest living room.

“I don't want to talk about me” Dean replied as he shook his head, sitting beside Benny. “Just talk about anything else, I don't care. Just not... Me. Like, huh... Let me think... What's your favorite superhero?” he finally said, the first thing that crossed his mind.

Benny blinked at the boy, surprised, not having expected that kind of question at all. Then he started laughing, even throwing his head back a little, and grinned widely at Dean.

“I dunno, Green Lantern maybe? I once read a couple comics. But that isn't my kind of thing, really. So, you like comics and such then?”

“Yeah, more than most people I guess” Dean confirmed with a nod. “Batman's my favorite, he's awesome” he added, offering Benny the first genuine smile since they met.

“Yeah, he's great” Benny agreed, trying to sound convincing. To be honest, he had absolutely no idea what they were talking about, but he decided to go along with it anyway.

“You look rather lost” Dean commented with a smirk and a little chuckle. “You don't have much idea what I'm talking about, do you?”

“Absolutely none” Benny admitted gleefully. “Told you it's not my thing. But keep going, why is Batman awesome?”

“I dunno” Dean said with a little shrug. “He's an orphan, like me. And he has lots of money, which is cool. And he has a cool car. And he saves people, obviously, but he doesn't kill anybody. And his whole thing is mastering fear, which is cool too."

Benny wondered if Dean realized how much he was telling him about himself, but he also wondered if he was looking too much into it. He kept smiling and nodded as he listened.

“Sounds interesting. Maybe I should give it a look sometime.”

Yeah, you should. He's awesome” Dean replied as he nodded excitedly. He paused for a second and tilted his head sightly. “And if you don't like comics, then what kind of stuff do you like?”

“I got a job which takes a lot of time. When I'm free I like to go fishing, reading, watching TV sometimes. Boring stuff, you know.”

"Sometimes boring stuff is good. And what kinda books do you like to read?"

“Mostly classics, but the standards, nothing too fancy. You know, Victor Hugo, Alexandre Dumas, Shakespeare, a few spanish things. Sometimes Neil Gaiman or Lovecraft, that sort of thing.”

Dean blinked at him, nodding and pretending he knew what Benny was talking about. He only knew one of them, and he thought he might recognize two more. But he'd never read a complete work by any of them.

“But that's nothing exciting, really. Not worth listening to if you don't like it yourself” Benny continued, waving his hand and unaware of Dean's slight confusion. “Anyway, it's outdoor things I like most. I got a little boat, I love getting on it and spend time sailing” he declared with a wide grin.

“You have a boat?” Dean inquired, his eyes brightening in interest at the other's words, scooting closer to the edge of his seat. “That sounds awesome.”

Benny smiled, pleased with Dean's interest. “I did mention I like to go fishing, didn't I? There's a rather big lake nearby, it's very relaxing to go in there. Been doing it with my dad since I was five” he explained, grinning fondly. He thought for a second and then added: “You could try it yourself sometime, if you want.”

When he heard Benny's words, Dean's eyebrows furrowed and he moved imperceptibly further from Benny in his seat.

“Why would you invite me? If you think it's gonna get you in my pants, it won't work.”

“If I wanted to get in your pants, I wold have paid for that blowjob you offered me earlier, don't you think?” Benny pointed out as if it was obvious, raising his eyebrows.

Dean rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, annoyed. “That's not how people work. You would have to pay 50 bucks before, but if you took me out on your boat to fuck me you wouldn't have to pay me anything” he explained and gave a little shrug, as if he didn't think he really needed to explain it.

“Glad to know I managed to make such a great impression on you” Benny commented dryly. He stood up, preparing to leave. “If you really want to know why I offered, it's because you seemed excited with the idea, I never have any company when I go there, and I hoped it motivated you to stay for a while. Becuase you're just a child and you're definitely better here than on the road, on your own, with 14 dollars and offering strangers blowjobs.”

Dean stood too, arms crossed to make himself look bigger than he really was and staring angrily at Benny.

“I ain't a kid. I didn't ever get to be a kid, don't you get that? Can you blame me for being skeptical? This is the first time in my life anybody's ever seemed to genuinely give a damn about what's going on with me, and sorry but I don't buy that bullshit that you don't have some ulterior motive. And I met you an hour ago! What's up with that, huh?”

“Well, it's because you're young and messed up and you obviously need a lot of help, and I like to think of myself as a good man” Benny answered, making his voice sound a bit softer. “Is that really that hard to believe?”

Dean laughed loudly at that, but there was no sort of humor in the sound. “Yes! Yes it is, because there aren't good people! People are ugly and nasty and terrible and they don't give a shit about anyone! It's precisely because I _am_ young and messed up and I need help that you would try to take advantage of me.”

A hurt look crossed Benny's face and he unconsciously gave a little step back, as if Dean's words had physically hitten him.

“I understand why you would think that, and I disagree. There are good people, Dean, and I will show you if you let me.”

He paused for a moment, and then sighed tiredly.

“Well, I think it will be better to leave you now, I don't think you feel like seeing my face. Ask Elizabeth tomorrow if you happen to want to find me. Good night.”

Then, after one last look, in which Dean saw pity and compassion, he left the room, leaving Dean alone.

Dean huffed angrily and dropped back on the sofa, crossing his arms. He gathered his thoughts for a few minutes before he took the key he'd been given out of his pocket and found the corresponding number.

The shower he took was blissful, hot water and good, consistent pressure the whole time, not to mention there was actual soap. The bed was comfortable, and the sheets were soft and smelled fresh. Dean found himself wishing he could stay in a place like that all the time, but he knew that wasn't gonna happen.

After he got out of all his clothes and finally settled in, he closed his eyes contently and slept better than he had in a long time, and at least twice as long.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's Chapter 2! We hope you enjoy. Probably won't put up chapter three until the DBBB is over :)

After leaving Dean, Benny walked towards his house with his hands inside his pockets, looking down with a little frown on his face.

He was worried about the kid - because, regardless of what Dean said, he was a kid – and what he would do. But he had no real obligation towards him, and even though he wanted to help him, he couldn't if Dean didn't want to be helped.

When he entered his house he headed to his bedroom without bothering to turn the lights on and shed his clothes off, putting the gun on the nightstand.

He reached a decision: He would wait for Dean to reach out to him again; if he insisted, it would be like confirming Dean's suspicion that he was after something, and if Dean didn't then there was nothing he could do anyway.

By the time he entered the shower, the thought of Dean was only something on the back of his mind, along with the many other things that had occupied his mind that day, and when he looked at his phone after getting into bed, he groaned: He only had five hours before he was needed at the café.

-0-o-0-o-0-

When he finally had a moment free after having taken care of the clients, Benny got his phone and went through his messages. He stopped when he saw he had one from Dean.

_Does the offer to go out on your boat still stand? - DW_

Benny hummed as he read it again, thoughtful. He wondered what the right way to reply was, if being too nice would throw Dean off like it had the night before, or if commenting on Dean's change of mind would do the same. He put his phone away as a customer came and put the nicest of smiles on his face. Here's your coffee and pie, thank you very much. Then he got his phone again and replied.

_Sure, if you want. This afternoon, working right now. - BL_

Not even a minute later, his phone rang as he got the answer:

_Oh, sorry to bother you. Just text me when you get off, then. - DW_

Benny nodded and supressed a little yawn as he looked around the establishment: No clients to attend to for now, nothing to do. He looked at the time: Two hours and a half and he would be free. He sighed and rested his arms on the counter, getting ready to wait.

When, finally, his shift ended, Benny headed home and sighed relieved once he was inside. He looked through the fridge and ate some leftovers from the day before. When he finished, he sat on the couch to rest for a bit, and texted Dean:

_If you're still up to it, I can go over there now.- BL_

_Definitely. If you want to, I mean. It's up to you. - DW_

Benny nodded at the screen and ten minutes later he was knocking on his cousin's door. When Elizabeth opened the door he smiled at her and kissed her on the cheek. He asked her how Dean had been doing all morning, then they spoke about personal matters for a couple more minutes and then he went up the stairs to the second floor and knocked on Dean's door.

There was some noise on the other side, and a couple seconds later Dean was opening the door with a wide smile on his face.

“Hey, man” he greeted excitedly. One moment later he frowned once he had gotten a good look at Benny. “You look tired.”

“That's the thing with having a job that makes you deal with people all morning and having had little sleep” he explained idly with a shrug. “So, how has your morning gone?”

When Dean had woken up that morning he messily threw on some clothes and headed downstairs, smiling brightly at Elizabeth when she showed him to his breakfast. He gave her a quiet thanks and eagerly sat at the table, scarfing it all down without any regard to manners.

He was still a bit hungry when he finished the plate, but didn't dare bother anyone by asking for more. He got back to his room and fell on the bed, getting the remote and turning the TV on. He flipped through the channels but got bored quickly. That was when he picked up his phone and asked Benny if the boat offer was still up.

When he got the answer, he sat there unsure of what to do in the meantime. He spent a couple more minutes flipping channels, but didn't find anything interesring. He went downstairs and found Elizabeth, approaching her carefully, not wanting to bother her.

She gave him a couple books he might like and he took them to his room and read to keep himself entertained while he waited. When he got Benny's message he jumped to his phone and quickly confirmed that, yes, he was still interested. Being honest, he was really excited about it. He had read after that until he opened the door to Benny.

“I was fine” he replied with a little shrug. “You were right about the food, man. And the bed is so comfortable” he added excitedly, which earned him a smile from Benny. "Are you sure you're up to going out on your boat though? I don't blame you if you'd rather go home and sleep."

Benny shook his head. “Nah, I'd rather go on the boat, I told you I love that piece of metal. I sleep better there than at home anyway. You want to go now?”

“Yeah, that'd be awesome. Do I need to bring anything with me?” Dean asked, already reaching for his shoes.

“Not really. I got stuff for fishing, swimsuits, or you can just laze around. Well, it's a good place for reading, so you could bring a book” Benny added, noticing the books Dean had on his bed. “What are you reading, by the way?”

Dean picked up one of the books. ”I tried to read some of Tom Sawyer, but I didn't like it much, so I tried this one.” He held it up so Benny could see it. “It's Carrie, by Stephen King. I like it a lot better.”

“You don't like Tom Sawyer?” Benny said after making an indignant noise. “You just made an enemy out of me, brother” he said, but grinned to show Dean he was only joking. “Carrie's good too, though. Anyway, shall we get going?”

Dean nodded and grabbed his book. “I guess Tom Sawyer wasn't bad, but it was kinda hard for me to read” he admitted as he followed Benny out. He looked Benny up and down. “I don't think I can fit in your swim trunks, man” he added quickly changing the subject.

“I guess you're right” Benny agreed. He made no comment on Dean having problems reading, still afraid of causing a violent reaction in the boy.

“We could stop by Walmart or something like that so I could get some my size?”

"So swimming it is, right? Of course we can." They got on the truck and Benny drove until he stopped in front of a small shop. He got his wallet out and handed Dean some money. “Go for them, I'll stay here.”

Dean hesitantly took the money and paused for a second. "Promise you'll stay right here?" he asked, hand holding tight to the door.

"What's the point in going away?" Benny asked back, with his eyebrow raising. "You'd just go back to my cousin's with new trunks."

“I dunno” Dean shrugged. “I'll be right back.”

He got out of the car and entered the shop. Soon he came out, having found and bought some navy and white stripped boxers in his size, and he sighed in relief when he saw Benny's truck was still there. He came back in and gave Benny the change.

“Thank you.”

“I've got a good paycheck” Benny replied, dismissing it. “It won't take more than ten minutes to get there.”

They didn't say anything after that. Dean started humming quietly along the radio when Benny turned it on, looking at the scenery through the windows.

“I prefer the ladies, if that makes you feel better” Benny said a couple minutes later, out of nowhere.

“I'm sure every married man that's paid me tells himself the same thing” Dean replied with a derisive huff. “Anyway, I wasn't worried about that.”

Benny ignored Dean and continued:

"I'm also currently trying to get back with my ex, Andrea. She works at that store and things are a bit rocky between us right now, that's why I didn't want to go in."

As he finished speaking, the truck stopped at the dock.

Dean smirked naughtily at Benny as he grabbed his things and hopped out.

“Is she hot?”

Of course, he already knew the answer to that question; guys like Benny didn't have to end up with anything less than a perfect 10. Not that some of them didn't sometimes, as he had seen, but they didn't have to.

“You've already seen her. She was working at the counter, I saw from the street. So, yeah, she's hot” Benny answered with a somewhat mischievous grin. “She wasn't quite so much when we first hooked up, when we were sixteen. But adulthood has served her right.”

“She was pretty hot, yeah” Dean replied with a smile as he followed Benny. “Really pretty eyes, too” he added. “Where am I supposed to change, by the way?”

“There's a cabin in the boat” Benny replied as he got his keys from his pocket and opened a small shed, next to a couple others, inside which there was the boat. It was small, but more than enough for two people.

Dean thanked him with a smile as he stepped inside the cabin and locked the door behind him. He stripped off his clothes and tore the tags off his new trunks before putting them on, and while he did he felt the boat start to move. Then he stepped back out onto the deck and smiled brightly when he felt how the shadow was left behind and the sun hit his skin.

“Beautiful day, huh?”

“Yeah, it is” Benny agreed smiling just as brightly, handing the rudder. In a couple minutes they were well inside the lake, the boat moving gently due to the waves, and Benny turned the boat's engine off.

“Some fish in here, but nothing dangerous. Go on” he said, gesturing to the water with his head. He pulled a deck chair from the cabin and got comfortable in it.

Dean grinned widely and ran, jumping off the side of the boat and doing a cannonball into the water, making a big splash. When he resurfaced he laughed, shaking his wet hair out of his face.

"You're not gonna swim?"

“Maybe later” Benny replied with a shout, crossing his arms behind his head and closing his eyes, relaxed and content. It was nice having someone else there.

While he took a short nap, Dean swam around for a while longer, but eventually he climbed back on the boat and laid out on the sunny deck, face up. He stole glances at Benny every now and then, appreciating his physique in the good light.

After a while, he saw Benny open his eyes and move, stretching his muscles and yawning loudly. He shot a look at Dean and smiled at him.

“So, Dean, do you feel like fishing? Or do you still want to get me in the water?”

Dean sat up, smiling mischievously. "Get in the water. We can play Marco Polo?" he suggested, giving Benny his most charming smile.

"Good for me, if you want to" Benny replied after a moment. It had been quite a long time since the last time he played anything like that, and he was a little surprised by Dean's request.

He entered the cabin and a minute later he came out only on his swimsuit, unaware of Dean's attempts not to stare at his newly exposed skin. Calmer than Dean before, he went to the stairs and climbed down to the cool water, after which Dean jumped in beside him, and laughed when he came up and saw him all wet.

“You wanna be Marco or Polo?”

Benny shrugged, or at least did the closest thing he could while floating on his back. “Marco? I don't really care.”

“Okay, close your eyes then” Dean replied as he swam away from him, but careful not to get too far from the boat.

Benny did as he was told with an amused and somewhat wry grin on his lips.

“Marco.”

“Polo!”

And the game began. Dean was surprised by the speed at which Benny was capable to swim, due to having spent a good part of his life on the water, but Dean managed to elude him. Benny chased him for what could have been 20 minutes, frustrated but also laughing like he hadn't in a long time.

Eventually, Benny managed to touch Dean's shoulder, and he let out a cry of victory as he quickly wrapped his arms tightly around the boy's body. Immediately, Dean went tense and made a surprised sound. He quickly elbowed Benny in the stomach and wrestled out of his arms, rushing to get away.

When he was a meter and a half away, he stopped and turned, his face gone pale.

“Shit. Fuck, I'm sorry. Are you OK?”

“Ouch” Benny said slowly, hands over the spot where he had been hit and sightly hunched. He recovered quickly and gave Dean a somewhat pained grin. “Yeah, I'm OK. Impressive hit, by the way.”

“Sorry, I'm sorry... You grabbed me from behind, and it freaked me out, sorry” Dean continued apologizing, his worry obvious on his face.

“I said it's OK, Dean” Benny assured raising his hands. “It took me by surprise, that's all. I'm resistent, see? Muscle shield” he added, punching his stomach gently. “Won't do it again, I promise.”

“Okay” Dean accepted with a nod, biting his lip.

There was a stretch of uncomfortable silence before Dean smiled softly.

“That was pretty fun before that though, right? You were laughing.”

“Yeah, I was. So were you” Benny pointed out, returning a smile just as soft. There was a small shine on his eyes.

“How about we get back on the boat? Wanna dry off and warm up in the sun.”

“Was about to suggest it myself.”

Benny swam towards the stairs and climbed up. Once he was on the boat he stretched his arm to help Dean up, which Dean gladly took. Maybe he let the touch linger a bit longer than he should have, but who could blame him? Benny's hands were thick and strong, and just the thought of what they might be able to do made him weak in the knees...

But he shouldn't think about that. Especially not when they were lacking so many clothes.

Benny went inside his cabin and came back with two large towels. He handed Dean one and spread his out on the boat's floor and lied on it, on his back and with his arms crossed behind his head.

"I think I feel like taking another nap.”

“Okay, so take one” Dean replied after drying his hair off and laying his towel beside Benny's. “I can wake you up whenever you want, or if you look like you're burning or something.” He shrugged, turning over on his stomach and resting his head on his folded arms.

"If it's been an hour then wake me up." Benny pointed inside the cabin. "The fishing stuff's in there if you get bored, hard to miss."

Then he yawned and he closed his eyes. In less than five minutes he was snoring softly. Dean read until the time Benny had told him had passed, and then came closer to him and shook his shoulder. Benny muttered something on his sleep and wrapped his arm around Dean's loosely. Dean chuckled.

“Benny. Hey, Benny, time to get up.”

Benny opened his eyes slowly, and when he realized he was clinging to Dean he let go with a sheepish smile. He yawned again and looked at the sun.

“Guess it's time to get going back, isn't it?”

“Yeah. Can we stop and eat somewhere on the way back? I'm starving. And I can pay for my own" he assured.

"Sure thing."

Benny changed clothes and led the boat inside its shed while Dean did the same. They hopped off the boat, Dean grinning.

"Thanks for takin' me out, man."

"I did it only because I never have anyone who wants to go with me" Benny replied cheekily with a wink. "It was fun, wasn't it? It'd be good to do it again.”

Dean nodded excitedly, glad that Benny had had as much fun as he had. And if he blushed at Benny's wink, he would never admit it.

“Now, were you saying about eating somewhere?"

“There's a couple places here, both with local food only” Benny explained as they went back to the truck. “If you want anything else you got to go somewhere else, which implies drving for an hour, or cook it yourself. I don't think either of us feels like it right now, so is local good for you?”

“I'm not sure what local food is, but I'm not picky.”

There was one restaurant on the way to Elizabeth's, sa that was where they went, arriving a couple minutes later. Dean stepped inside and his shoulders relaxed visibly at the welcoming smell.

“Wow, it smells really good in here.”

Benny grimmed at him and led Dean to a small table. The atmosphere was calm, warm and pleasant. When the waiter came, Benny ordered a large beer, while Dean ordered water. Water was free.

Dean also flashed the waiter, who was rather cute, an extra charming smile, the Dean Winchester trademarked one. Benny noticed it, and for a second the thought of what would happen if Dean tried to make him the same offer he had made Benny the night before crossed his mind. He forced it out and hid it with a smile.

He started telling Dean about every dish, what they had of how they were made, while Dean listened carefully enjoying the sound of Benny's voice, thick and warm and inviting just like the rest of him. Seeing him talk about something he so clearly was interested in made him even more appealing.

Anyone watching them could've seen the stars in Dean's eyes a mile away. The question was if Benny did.

Truth was, Benny did see them, but didn't want to. He supposed it was safe to assume that Dean wouldn't explode at the tiniest mistake anymore, and in fact had some interest in Benny, if he was reading the younger man the right way. And it wasn't like Dean was an unpleasant person, and if Benny had allowed himself to think about it he would also find him quite easy on the eyes.

The problem was that he was young, and obviously hadn't had much kindness in his life; Benny worried that Dean mistook this affection he seemed to be developing, due to gratitude mostly, for something different. Benny also felt that if he tried any move all he would be doing would be taking advantage of the boy, and as far as he had seen what Dean needed was someone who didn't want to take advantage of him in any sense.

Plus, there was the fact that he wasn't over Andrea, and didn't plan to be.

He decided his food and asked Dean if he had decided his, with a smile on his lips. Truth was, it was being dangerously easy to warm up to that boy.

Dean finally decided on a dish he wasn't too sure how to pronounce, telling Benny with a grin. It was nice, having commpany for once, and he thought about how Benny hadn't filled their silences with too many questions, which he appreciated.

Especially when he didn't ask about the scars that covered Dean's torso and, mostly, his back, when they had been on the boat earlier. He knew that must have been hard.

They talked a bit while they waited for the waiter. At one point, Benny commented that he thought Dean was smart, to which Dean replied with a wink and a flirtation. Benny smirked despite himself; it was somewhat worrying, but he had to admit that Dean's flirting was charming on its own way, if a bit crude. And he reminded himself that he had no responsibility or authority over Dean: If he wanted to flirt, then he was free to do so, inappropriate as it was.

“Holy shit, this is awesome” Dean commented when he tasted his food and started digging faster into the dish. He hummed, content, a fairly lewd noise which had the slightest of blushes appear on Benny's cheeks.

“It's good” he conceded, “but it's best homemade.”

“It gets better than this?” Dean asked in disbelief, pointing at his dish for emphasis.

“Here, let me see.” Benny reached across the table and took some of Dean's food. He tasted it carefully and then said: “Yeah, it does. I could do better than this, if I wanted to.”

“I guess it runs in the family, huh?” Dean commented impressed. “Elizabeth did some really good breakfast this morning. Could've eaten another plate, but I didn't want to bother her or seem like a mooch.”

"She wouldn't have minded, you know. She's nice, if you had asked her for more she would've done it gladly. And she told me earlier that you're being a nice guest."

Dean smiled sheepishly. "She did?" he asked, eating more of his food. He liked Elizabeth, she was very nice, and he appreciated that she let him stay despite knowing his situation.

"Yeah, she did" Benny confirmed grinning. "She said you were very polite and nice. She also commented that she thinks you're quite handsome" he added with a playful wink.

Dean ducked his head to hide his shy smile. He wasn't used to those kind of compliments.

"That's nice of her to say. She's awful pretty herself." He paused. "Not that I'm interested like that in your cousin. But, you know, she is pretty."

“Hey, is that a blush?" Benny asked playfully, leaning forward and widening his grin. "You know, she's only a few years older than you are, and I'm not her guardian in any way. There'd be no problem with me if you were interested.”

"I am not blushing” Dean lied, even though the evidence was right on his face. "I don't..." He tried to think of how to word it without seeming insensitive. "I think she's great. She's really nice and pretty and just a good person. But she's just a little too, uh... Put-together for me, I guess? I think we'd be way too different to date."

Benny thought about it as he chewed on his food.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. You're the one who gets to decide, so it's your call."

Dean nodded, silent for a moment with the only sound that of their eating.

"Well, while we're on a similar subject, what about your girl? Andrea, right? Tell me about her."

A smile appeared on Benny's lips. It was genuine, but if someone looked attentively enough, a hint of bitterness could be seen there.

"Guess it's fair, huh?" he muttered quietly . "Well, what to say about Andrea? We've known each other since I was 15, and I fell for her in a single day. She's incredibly smart and educated, and she's self-confident, doesn't let anything stop her; she certainly doesn't intend to stay here working in the shop. She's gorgeous, too, and she knows how to read me like an open book; I'm almost a toy in her hands. She's incredibly talented at a lot of things. And she's completely wonderful."

It was obvious to Dean that Benny was head-over-heels for this girl, even if they weren't together anymore. He'd be lying if he said he wasn't at least a little jealous, but he supposed Benny probably deserved someone much better than him anyway.

“So what happened between you guys?” he asked carefully.

The bitterness on Benny's smile became more evident. He looked down and took some more food to his mouth violently.

"I could do you some homemade food, if you want. I enjoy cooking" he said, a certain roughness in his voice.

Dean understood that swerve in the conversation very clearly and decided to drop the subject.

"Yeah, okay. That would be really nice."

For almost a minute, Benny's gaze remained locked on his food, and then he sighed.

“Sorry about that. It's just a sore spot, not your fault at all. But yeah, how about you come around my place tomorrow so you can try my cooking, hm?”

“Yeah, I'd like that” Dean nodded with a smile. “And it's OK, you know. I understand not wanting to talk about stuff.”

Benny sent him a grateful smile which actually went up to his eyes. In comfortable silence, they finished up their food.

"So, do you want dessert or do you want to go already?"

Dean's eyes brightened immediately at the mention of dessert.

“Do they have pie?” he asked, already looking for any dessert counter that might be around, making Benny laugh.

"Aha. There's apple pie, peach pie, strawberry pie, any pie you can think of, basically," the other answered with an amused grin.

However, Dean's excited expression froze and then died when he counted the money in his head. He multiplied the tax and included the tip, and frowned when he found it wouldn't be enough.

“Uh. Maybe next time” he said, trying to sound neutral.

Benny nodded after a moment. He called the waiter and a few minutes later he came back with the bill. Benny looked at it and got his wallet.

“How do we do it, do we split it? How much did you have?”

“Same 14 dollars” Dean said quietly. It was a little embarrassing, but at least Benny wouldn't have to ask where he got more money, since he didn't have any.

“That's little more than half of this, Dean” Benny pointed out. He paused for a moment and then continued in a soft voice. “And I wouldn't want you to not have anything. Look, I meant it when I said I have a good paycheck, so I can afford paying all of this.”

Dean blushed a dark shade of red, covering his face with his hands, elbows resting on the table.

“I'm sorry” he said, unable to look back at Benny and see that same look that bordered on pity on his eyes. He could hear that same pity on his voice, too, and it made him sick. “Fuck. Fuck.”

“Don't be sorry, Dean. Tell me, is it in any way your choice to be in a situation like this?” Benny asked calmly as he filled the bill. Dean shook his head. “I thought so. So don't be sorry about something that's not your fault, OK?”

Dean didn't reply, only ran his hands through his hair and kept his eyes on the table. He didn't understand how Benny could be so nice to him.

Benny stood and smiled faintly. “C'mon, kid, let's go, I'll take you to Elizabeth's. There's something I want to talk to you about.”

Dean stood too and followed Benny out. Once they were seated on the car, he raised his eyebrow at him.

“What do you want to talk about?” he prompted, hoping it was something positive, or even something trivial. He didn't want to hear any sort of admonishment from Benny in that moment.

Benny didn't start the engine; instead, he licked his lips slowly and then turned to face Dean, looking at him thoughtfully.

“Your stay at Elizabeth's is paid and you don't owe her anything, and right now we're in the middle of the tourist season. Lizzie's very capable, but she's young and she's taking care of the place almost on her own, and she meant what she said about liking you, I could tell. So I'm thinking, why don't you help her take care of all of it and earn some money, uh? Yesterday you said no one would want to hire you; I would like to differ.”

He tried not to show that he was somewhat nervous: Not only because he genuinely thought Elizabeth could use help, but Dean could use helping her too. Benny was sure that earning money in a honest way could do wonders to both Dean's wallet and psyche.

Dean looked at Benny for a moment. He really couldn't understand why he, and Elizabeth too, were being so nice to him. They'd already proven they didn't want anything from him, although there wasn't much to want in the first place. And Dean just absolutely couldn't wrap his head around it.

But getting the job really did sound nice. He licked his lips and bit the bottom one in thought for a minute before looking back at the man.

“If I took the job, would Elizabeth let me stay? Past the week that's paid, I mean.”

A little relieved smiled appeared on Benny's face. “If you prove yourself capable of providing good help, then I can't think of any reason she wouldn't. You two may need to rearrange things a bit about rooms and that, but I wouldn't expect trouble. So, are you gonna take it?”

“Yeah, I'd love to” Dean said, nodding with a wide smile. “I've never really worked a real job though, so I might need some help at first” he explained, hands twisting excitedly in his lap.

“I'm sure she'll be happy to show you” Benny replied, starting to drive with a smile. The truth was that he found Dean's excitement very endearing. “But being inexperienced doesn't mean I don't expect you to do your best. Elizabeth's doing you a huge favor with this” he warned, but trying to keep a friendly voice.

"Yeah. Yeah, of course. I understand that” Dean answered nodding quickly. “I promise I'll work really hard and be really nice to all the guests" he said, grinning excitedly again.

In under a minute Benny was parking in front of Elizabeth's house and looked at Dean.

"Here we are. You're good to go in on your own and tell her yourself, or you want me to go with you?"

"I can tell her" Dean replied, opening the door and hopping out. "I'll see you tomorrow, yeah? You said you were gonna cook for me."

"Yeah, I did. Gonna give you some proper traditional food, promise you're gonna love it." He reached out and squeezed Dean's nape gently. "Have a good night, kid."

He saw the way Dean blushed sightly and patted Benny's hand before he went outside, waving at Benny from the door. He watched until Dean disappeared inside the building, and then, humming to himself, drove home.

He went through the routine of brushing his teeth and showering mechanically, and then lied on his bed. His good mood had gone, and now there was a thoughtful, and somewhat sorrowful, expression on his face.

He spent almost ten minutes looking at the screen of his phone, biting his lip and repeatedly going back and forth to the call screen. Finally, with a sigh, he made a call and pressed the phone to his ear, his gaze fixed on the ceiling.

“Hello?” he said hesitantly. “Andrea. It's good to hear your voice.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a very short one, but it was best like that from a narrative point of view. The next one will be back to being longer!

 

Elizabeth heard the front door opening and went to the hall, smiling brightly at Dean when she saw him.

“Hello, Dean. How was your day?”

“It was good, thank you” he replied, grinning back and thankful for her friendliness. “Benny and I had a good time at the lake. He, huh, he brought up that I might be able to get a job here?” he asked unsurely after a pause.

She nodded. “Yeah, we talked about it this afternoon before he went up to get you. He said that you'd be willing to get a job here and that you needed it, he didn't go into details. I take it he talked to you about it himself, so, are you interested in it?”

“Yeah, it'd be great” Dean confirmed with a nod. Then he added smiling widely, “and I swear I'll work real hard. And, em, just to make sure, if I start working here I'll be able to stay, right? I could move to another room to not be in the way or something like that.”

“Sure. We have a couple rooms for personal guests, we don't have those too often so you can go there with no problem. And of course you'll work hard.” She approached Dean and pinched Dean's arms, winking at him teasingly. “Looks like you've got something in there, so better put it to use don't you think? Come on, I'll show you the new room. It's upstairs, next to mine.”

A light blush appeared on Dean's cheeks as he followed her. He wasn't sure how he should feel about his room being so close to hers, but what he was sure about was that he didn't mind. She was very pretty, he couldn't help noticing. That had to be a family thing.

Soon, after stopping for one moment on his previous room to get the few things he had, Dean stepped into the new one and smiled widely: It was a little bigger than the guest room he'd been using, and the bathroom was a little nicer too.

“Oh, wow. I could definitely get used to this.”

“Well, you _can_ , since it looks like it's gonna be yours.” She offered him her hand. “Welcome into business sir” she said jokingly.

Dean took the offered hand and shook it politely and laughing. He thought her skin was so very soft against his own.

“Your duties will be helping me making and serving breakfast, keeping the house nice and tidy, cleaning rooms once the guests are gone, that kind of things.”

“Sounds great. Although you might have to show me how to do some of that stuff.”

“Gladly. Any help will be great, really, so even if you don't know how to do it yet I'm grateful. It'll be nice to have you around” she said patting his shoulder gently.

"Yeah, well, it'll be nice to be around such a pretty face" Dean replied with a cheeky wink. He wasn't really sure what kind of risk he was taking, but he felt good about it.

Elizabeth blushed a little and looked down, but just when Dean feared he had made a mistake she looked up and grinned at him just as cheekily.

"Likewise, Dean. You look like a model" she replied, winking back at him and biting her lower lip to stop a laugh from coming out.

"A model, huh? Well, I'm flattered” he said, raising his eyebrows and giving her his most charming smile. “If you aren't careful, you might have this model falling in love with you” he said leaning towards her and widening his smile as much as he could.

“Well mister model, that'd make me most happy.” Elizabeth pulled her finger over Dean's lips, locked gazes with him, and then pushed his face away with a laugh. “You sure go fast, Romeo. But how about you get one night's sleep before you continue pursuing my love, hm?”

Dean laughed too as he stepped back, raising his hands in defeat. “You break my heart, Elizabeth. But I will not give up so easily.” His arms fell down and he looked fondly at the young woman. He couldn't believe just how easy it was to talk to her and joke. He briefly wondered if that joking could eventually lead to something else. “Have a good night, Elizabeth.”

“Likewise, Dean” she replied. She smiled at him one last time and closed the door behind her.

Dean turned around and inspected his new room, grinning wildly. The bed looked just as comfortable as the one on the other room. He took a quick shower, still almost unable to believe how good it was, and soon covered himself with the blankets and slept just as good as he had the night before.

-0-o-0-o-0- 

“ _Benny_ ” said Andrea's voice on the other side of the call.

“Andrea” Benny replied softly. “It's good to hear your voice.”

Benny waited for her to say anything, but if she was going to then she was taking a long time to do so. Benny rushed to fill the silence.

“Huh, so how are you doing?”

He heard a little sigh from the other end of the line. “ _Benny... I appreciate you asking, but you can't keep doing this, okay? I hate see you hurting and I know this is hard for you. It's hard for me too. But the late night phone calls have to stop._ ”

“Aw, c'mon darling, don't be like that” Benny replied, utterly failing at making his voice carefree. “I haven't called you for two whole weeks now. It's just that today I was talking to a friend about you and, you know, I started thinking. I needed to listen to your voice, I guess.”

“ _Was it that boy that came into the store today? I saw him get in your truck_.”

“Yeah” Benny confirmed after a soft hum. “I met him last night in the truck stop. He's in a pretty bad place and I'm trying to help him. But what about you? What have you been doing?”

There was a long silence before Andrea answered. “ _I've been picking things up. I'm moving next week_ ” she explained quietly, as if she didn't want to hear the answer she would get but knew it was coming anyway.

Benny almost let the phone drop to the floor as his eyes widened and his heart skipped a beat. It took him almost a minute to be able to talk again. He wanted to protest, scream at her. Beg.

“Is that so?” was the quiet reply that came out instead. “Would it do me any good to tell you again that I'm sorry? Andrea, you know I won't let us end like this. We've been together for almost ten years, all of that can't just disappear.”

“ _We're not together anymore, Benny. You know that as well as I do. We ended things_.” There was another sigh. “ _I ended things, Benny, months ago. I know it's been hard on you. It's been hard on me, too._ ”

"You can't do this to me” Benny said roughly, almost angry. “And I know you don't want to do it to yourself either. We both made mistakes, mostly me. We've come to a rough patch, so what? All couples have those, specially when they've been together for as long as we have. We can put this behind us.”

“ _Don't try to speak for me, Benny. It was never about our mistakes. I know what I'm thinking and I know what I want_.”

"I mean it, Andrea. I'm sorry and it was my fault, and I promise you I can do better. I will do better. But if you're so sure about that, then hang up" Benny dared, his voice shaking. "Go ahead, cut me off."

“ _Benny, it wasn't just your fault_ ” she said gently.

Benny laughed bitterly. He covered his eyes with his hand and he felt tears fall down his face.

"It wasn't? Come on Andrea, I'm not too bright but don't try to make me believe that. If it wasn't for what I did we'd be sleeping together right now."

" _That's a reason, but it wasn't the reason. Do you understand what I'm saying? We both made mistakes then, but we could have worked past that if there wasn't a bigger problem_ .”

"And what would that be? Do you mean that you don't love me anymore, Andrea? Because if that's what you're saying, then I must congratulate you; you're an excellent actress. Not that I didn't know that already, you've always been good at everything."

" _Benny, would you let me talk? Please?_ " she asked, a hint of frustration clear in her voice. " _I do love you. I really, really do. But we were drifting, Benny, couldn't you feel it? We are getting older and becoming different people, and we just don't fit together like the perfect jigsaw pieces we were anymore. We want different things, we're different people than we used to be._ "

The tears were drying up now, and Benny was just staring blakly at the ceiling.

"But that's not fair, Andrea, it's not fair. You just said you love me, I love you, and that's all that should matter. You want different things, you want to leave town? Alright, I'm willing to go with you. There's nothing to really keep me here. I  _want_ to go with you."

" _I know. I know you do, Benny_ ” Andrea said. In her voice, Benny could hear that she was the one tearing up now. “ _I know you would follow me to the end of the earth and off the edge, but... This is the end of the line_ ."

A shaky, desperate laugh came out of Benny's chest. "What am I supposed to do from now on, huh? I don't think I can function without you anymore."

" _Oh, Benny, you're much stronger than you give yourself credit for. You know that, right? You're a good, kind man. And I'm sure you'll find happiness. You have all my best wishes, okay?_ "

"You're a wonderful woman too, Andrea" Benny muttered quietly, his voice barely above a whisper. "I- I hope that you, that you can also find happiness. You deserve it. And, if- if you ever change your mind, you know what my number is."

Then, before he changed his mind, Benny finished the call; he didn't think he would be able to listen to anything else. He closed the phone and roughly threw it to the floor.

He covered his face with both hands, and quiet tears started falling from his eyes again. That was how he fell asleep.

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this update was a little slow! Author Marium has been travelling with varying wifi capabilities, and I've been adjusting to life in college, not to mention actually moving into the dorm. But I hope you like this one!
> 
> Note: Grab the tissues, folks. The middle gets a little rough.

When Dean woke up the next morning, it was to the sound of Elizabeth pounding on his door.

“Get ready!” she said on the other side. “We have to be downstairs in twenty minutes. You're gonna help me make breakfast.”

Dean got up with just minimal grumbling, looking around for his clothes.

“I'll be down there in a while, just give me a few minutes, okay?” he yelled as he put them on.

There was a hum on the other side that sounded affirmative. Dean spent a couple minutes on the bathroom, washing his face and getting the sleep off, and fixed his clothes a bit. Once he was done he went downstairs into the kitchen.

“Good morning, my princess” he greeted with a cheeky smile and a wink when he walked in. He blew a kiss at her.

“There's stuff for us in that cupboard” Elizabeth said after rolling her eyes, completely ignoring him and pointing at it. “After that you're gonna tell the guests what we have this morning, which is in here,” she explained giving him a short menu with a few things written on it, “and you're gonna write down what they want. Then you'll help me with the cooking and bringing it to them, don't worry, there's not many guests at a time in this business, it's not a hotel. They'll leave shortly after and then we have to tidy up.”

Dean nodded, taking all the information in. Then she flashed him a little, somewhat amused smile.

“And then you'll be free to go to my cousin. You're spending the day with him again, right?”

“Yeah, he said he'd gonna cook for me today” he said proudly. “What time do you want me to come back?”

"Just early enough to be able to wake up tomorrow" the woman replied as she started making coffee. "You two seem to be getting along good, huh?" she asked, her smile gaining a mischevous edge.

"Yeah, we're like... Friends" Dean said with a nod, the word bringing a bright, broad smile to his face. "He's really nice. Nobody's ever been as nice to me as you guys have" he admitted quietly. "Not since I was a baby, anyway."

That made Elizabeth frown at him, concerned.

"Dean, you know that Benny's coming to care about you very fast, right? If you were there when we talked about you, he's very eager to help you. If there's anything you want to talk about, I'm sure he'd be happy to listen. So would I."

“No, it's fine. I'm fine” he repeated quietly. His eyes went quickly from Eliabeth to the door. “I'm gonna go take orders now.”

Elizabeth watched him leave and sighed. Then she saw that in his hurry to leave, he hadn't had any breakfast. She sighed again and started making something for him to eat when he came back.

Dean came back a few minutes later, his mood improved after having made friendly conversation with a few customers as he took their orders. He handed them to Elizabeth.

"Here you go."

Elizabeth nodded, but pointed at the table before looking at them.

“That's for you, hurry up and eat it. I want you to see how all of this is made.” She started getting the instruments and ingredients. “Let's make a delicious breakfast, shall we?”

Dean gulped down the food as fast as he could and then rolled up his sleeves as he approached the woman, watching carefullly and helping when he could.

Once everything was done and the dishes were clean, Dean, smiling and satisfied, proud even, with himself, went to his new room and pulled out his phone.

_Hey, Benny! We still hanging out today? - DW_

He didn't get an immediate answer, but he wasn't expecting it either; Benny was at work. So while he waited, he watched TV for a few minutes and then picked up his book. However, when an hour had passed and he still got no response, he started to worry a bit.

Ten minutes later was when the answer finally came.

_If you want - BL_

Dean frowned, taken aback by the tone of the reply.

_If you don't want to, that's okay - DW_

_No, it's OK. But maybe you could come to my place on your own? I need to do some stuff - BL_

Dean sighed in relief. For a moment there he'd really thought Benny would blow him off. He considered for a moment before typing again.

_Your place is what, like, half a mile down the road? It's a nice day, I can walk down there :) - DW_

_Yeah, it is. Sorry for not picking you up, I promise I'll take you to Elizabeth's later. Thanks for understanding. You can come by in about an hour - BL_

_It's okay! Like I said, it's a nice day. And an hour sounds good. I seriously need a shower - DW_

Dean was smiling when he set the phone aside, relieved that Benny hadn't told him to leave him alone. He really was eager to go to his place. He sat there for a few moments and then entered the shower.

-0-o-0-o-0-

Benny was awake long before his alarm sounded. He wasn't sure if he had slept at all, to be honest, one hour at most: He had spent the night lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling blankly, some tears falling from his eyes every now and then.

He let the alarm sound when it was time to wake up, and didn't move until it had sounded three times. Slowly, apathetic, he got out of bed after having rejected the idea of just staying in it all day. He absent-mindedly put some clothes on and, after a brief stop in the bathroom to pee, headed directly to the café. He didn't bother with breakfast or brushing his teeth.

His mood showed on his face during work; he was still as apathetic as he had been when he got up. He spoke to the costumers roughly and dryly, didn't even try to fake a smile like he usually did. He was somewhat pale and there were heavy bags under his tired eyes. He was hungry, but at the same time he felt like eating would make him throw up.

When he got Dean's text, he snorted and didn't answer. Only forty five minutes later did it occur to him that maybe it would be good to answer Dean. They boy seemed to be doing better, but he probably still needed a lot of validation. Then it took him almost half an hour to actually pick the phone and type

_If you want - BL_

_If you don't want to, that's okay - DW_

Benny looked at the screen, blinked a few times as he took the words in. It would be easy, to just tell Dean no, and spend the rest of the day wallowing in self pity. It wasn't like he was in the mood to be good company anyway.

But a little voice in his head told him that perhaps seeing Dean would be good for him, help him snap out of that mood. And besides, he had had a breakup; Dean was just getting out of a situation in which offering a stranger a blowjob for a bit of money was the usual. Dean needed his company much more than he needed to be alone.

_No, it's OK. But maybe you could come to my place on your own? I need to do some stuff - BL_

_Your place is what, like, half a mile down the road? It's a nice day, I can walk down there :) - DW_

_Yeah, it is. Sorry for not picking you up, I promise I'll take you to Elizabeth's later. Thanks for understanding. You can come by in about an hour - BL_

_It's okay! Like I said, it's a nice day. And an hour sounds good. I seriously need a shower - DW_

Benny smiled tiredly but genuinely at the screen. Thinking of Dean helped him feel less bad about himself; if the boy, who had it much worse, could keep being positive, then so could Benny.

When his shift ended, he headed home. The first thing he did was get a shower and clean himself up; he didn't need to look at the mirror to know he looked terrible, and honestly he didn't want to. Then he brushed his teeth, and after that he went to the kitchen, picking things and getting them ready.

-0-o-0-o-0-

Dean let Elizabeth know where he was headed and animatedly started going down the road. Ten minutes later he found Benny's house when he saw his truck in the driveway. He went up to the door and knocked on it firmly.

When Benny opened the door the first thing Dean saw were the heavy bags under his eyes and the way his expression was tired and somehow forced. However, the smile he gave Dean as he let him in was rather genuine.

"Hi, chief. How was your day?"

"It was fine. Helped Elizabeth with breakfast this morning" Dean said, giving him a worried look. "Are you okay? You don't look like you feel too great..."

"I read 'till too late last night and I didn't get enough sleep, that's all" Benny lied smoothly, waving his hand dismissively. "So your first day was good? I want details."

"Yeah, it was great. There's not much to tell, though. I just took orders and Elizabeth showed me how to cook breakfast and then I helped her clean dishes and stuff. And I got some tips from some people, which was cool."

"That's a good start, you'll get better at it with time. I'm sure you'll be great” Benny said with a smile. “For my part it was just another boring morning" he commented with a fake chuckle. "I'm gonna start cooking now, you can get comfortable on the living room, watch TV if you want."

Dean smiled gratefully and went into the living room, taking off his shoes and setting them by the door before he settled on the couch. He turned on the TV and flipped through the channels, grinning when he saw that Dr. Sexy was on.

“Dr Sexy?” Benny asked with a raised eyebrow and an amused smile, peeking through the door. He chuckled when Dean just shrugged and went back to the kitchen.

“This thing will be ready in about half an hour” he shouted from there a few minutes later. Dean called back to let him know he had heard, his eyes not moving from the screen. He loved the show, but his chances to actually watch it were pretty rare.

Half an hour later the food was ready. Benny set the table and brought the food to it, smiling at it and satisfied. He was positive Dean would love it.

“Food's ready, if you want to eat now.”

Dean turned the TV off and stepped into the kitchen. When he saw the food, his eyes went wide.

“Oh, wow... It looks amazing. It smells great too.”

He saw Benny's smile grow wider, although he still felt it was somehow weak. Regardless, it almost made the effect of the bags under his eyes disappear.

“Save your opinion for when you've actually tasted it” the man said as he sat down. “Go ahead, suit yourself.”

Dean didn't need to be told twice. He sat and immediately dug in, moaning at the taste. He didn't realize how sexual it sounded, and he didn't realize how Benny's cheeks colored lightly in response.

“So, good?” he asked bashfully, looking down at his own food but smiling.

"Hell yeah” Dean replied enthusiastically. “God, this is fuckin' amazing."

"I'm glad. Told you nothing beats homemade. Truth is, it's been a long time since I bothered cooking something good, it's nice putting effort into the food again. Helps you getting your mind off everything else."

Dean grinned and paused for a moment to actually chew what he was putting in his mouth.

"Did you have a nice night last night?"

Any improvement in Benny's mood caused by Dean's presence was wiped off along with the smile on his face. It took him a few seconds to reassemble his face.

"Just one more night" he said, trying for carefree. "Reading and sleeping."

"Benny..." Dean said with a frown, voice quieter now. "What happened, man? Is everything okay? If you don't wanna tell me, that's okay, but I can tell that's not true so don't lie to me."

"I called Andrea” Benny replied as his visibly forced smile got a bitter hint. “She finally convinced me to give up." He made a stop and took food to his mouth tensely. "Sweet, isn't it? Ten years of relationship gone to shit."

"Oh" Dean replied awkwardly, not sure what to say. He'd never had to console many people and wasn't good at it. "I'm sorry, man. That sucks." He paused. "You wanna get wasted?"

"No, I don't think so” Benny replied, his expression not going any less tense. “Drinking's what fucked me up in the first place, I don't wanna discover what happens next time I get drunk." His fist was tensed around his fork, his knuckles gone white.

“I can make sure you don't do anything stupid.”

Benny sighed and brought his hand to his face, massaging his brow.

"Look, you can't drink yet. I'm not gonna make you drink just because I feel like shit. Why don't you just finish your food, huh?"

"Nobody said I had to drink too" the other pointed out quietly, eating some more.

Benny sighed again, but after that he chuckled tiredly.

"Don't insist. I don't want to drink, really; I'm in a very bad mood and I don't want to risk doing anything stupid. But Dean? I appreciate it, really."

"Is there anything that would make you feel better? Anything I can do to help?"

"Other than giving me time to get over it? Nah, I don't think so" Benny said with a shrug. "I'll be fine, really."

He leaned forward, licking his lips hesitantly. He wanted to ask, but thought that maybe he was overstepping.

"And now, why don't you tell me something about you?"

  
Dean's eyebrows drew together and his eyes narrowed suspiciously and he leaned back a few inches.

"Like what?" he asked, voice quiet and rough. He was always extremely hesitant to share anything too personal about himself.

So no answer yet, then. Benny leaned back again and waved his hand.

"Nothing, kid, nothing. Forget I said that." He stood up and collected his plate. "Stay here, I'm gonna get dessert."

"Okay, awesome. What kinda dessert is it?" Dean inquired, his smile quickly returning at the prospect of something sweet.

"Pecan pie" Benny informed from the kitchen. A moment later he came back with a dish and put it next to Dean's plate. "Hope you like it too."

"Oh, man. I love pie" he said, digging in and humming happily, nearly vibrating from excitement. "Wow. This is... Wow. Not as good as my mom's was, but really really good" he commented, not even thinking about what he had just said.

Benny's eyes sparkled. He had two choices: he could pursue that lead, or he could ignore it and let Dean be at peace. Any other day, he might have taken the second option, but today, he was sad, angry and bitter beneath his calm exterior. He had told Dean something about himself; he felt he was owed at least a little bit of info about Dean.

"Oh, so your mom used to make pie for you?" he asked with his most friendly voice, trying to make Dean know that he didn't mean to make him uncomfortable.

"Huh?" Dean looked up from his pie and his smile faltered a bit. "Oh. Yeah, she did. She had me help her a lot of the time too. I mean, in the ways that I could. Pouring stuff in the mixing bowl and all that.".

"Oh, so you helped your mom cooking? That's sweet” Benny commented smiling widely. “I bet you were an adorable kid."

He could push, Benny thought, ask more. But he had seen the way Dean's smile faltered, and he had no right to take his frustration out on the boy. He should leave it like it was.

Dean shrugged a little shyly. "I don't really know. I've only got one picture" he said, looking down at his lap and twisting his hands together.

"One picture?” Benny asked before he could stop himself. “You mean that you don't remember it?"

Dean licked his lips. His mouth suddenly felt too dry.

"I-I remember helping her cooking. Just... Just once. I don't..." He shook his head. "I don't even remember what it was, it's just... Random flashes of memory. Nothing solid. I don't really know if I was a cute kid. Cause I've only got the one picture of my family" he explained, choking a bit on the last word. It was one he used so rarely.

"Dean, shit, I'm sorry" Benny said, leaning forward and taking Dean's hand in his. His face showed sadness and regret. "I'm sorry for asking, I have no right. You don't have to tell me anything, alright?"

Dean pulled his hand away and looked down, nodding quietly. He knew if he saw the look on Benny's face he might start crying, and he wouldn't have that. Not in front of anyone.

"It's fine. Just... Eat your pie."

Benny nodded and starting doing so in the deadest of silences. Damn, what did he do now? How did he get Dean's mind on something else? He had probably ruined what little trust he had built between the two of them. Benny needed to say something, quickly.

"It was my fault," he started, first hesitantly but his voice getting stronger as he spoke. "That Andrea broke up with me. We had a fight, something petty, I don't even remember what it was. I got drunk and when I went to see her she was spending the night with a friend. I thought she was cheating on me, so I went and cheated on her with the first person I could find.”

“She found out the next morning. The look on her face is gonna be engraved in my mind forever. Then she went and cheated on me too, which I don't blame her for. And after that, everything sort of fell apart, all because I was a stupid drunk." He looked at Dean. "And that's all there is about it, what I didn't want to tell you. There is nothing else I have to hide."

Benny didn't know if his words had had any effect, if he had distracted Dean, or if he had made it worse, He hoped he hadn't. He waited for Dean's response tensely.

Dean looked up, blinking at Benny. He wasn't sure why Benny was telling him all this, but it made him feel like Benny trusted him. And that was something he would hold on to dearly.

He wasn't sure how long it was before he spoke again, but before he knew it, words were pouring out of his mouth, words that he hadn't shared in a very long time.

"I was 4. When my family died, I mean. There was a fire, it started in my baby brother's nursery. My mom went in to save him, but a beam fell on her. So my dad went in, got my baby brother, and brought him to me, told me to get outside and keep him safe. But he didn't come with me cause he wanted to go try and save Mom. He... He ran back in and after a minute I could..." He shuddered at the memory, hot tears rolling down his cheeks.

"I could hear him screaming" he said, his voice very quiet. "That was about when the fire truck showed up, but it was too late. They were dead. Then the paramedics came to me and my little brother and brought us to the truck. They took him from me and tried some things, but he was gone too." He paused, wiping some of the wetness from his face. "Smoke inhalation. He was six months old." Dean looked down and started to shake.

"So then I got thrown into the system. Foster care. And I turned 18 in January, so I was finally old enough to go out on my own. Even if that meant I was homeless with no money, it sounded a hell of a lot better than staying where I was at."

"Damn, Dean" Benny whispered. He could feel a stinging on his eyes. He had no words to say, he couldn't think of a single thing to say that could comfort the man. So if words failed him, then action would have to do.

He stood and went around the table until he stood next to Dean. He intended to hug Dean, comfort him. He hesitated for a second, but then did it; he kneeled and pulled Dean into a hug.

"Shhh, it's OK, Dean" he whispered gently. "Let it out."

Dean didn't even have to consider, just sunk into Benny's arms and wept. It had been a very long time since someone held him, and he'd completely forgotten how much better it made him feel. He clung tightly to him.

Benny let him weep, whispering comforting words in his ear. He started massaging his back and rocking forth and back gently. He didn't know or care how much time he spent like that.

Eventually, Dean settled down, sniffling and burying his face in Benny's shoulder and balling his hands in the back of his shirt.

"Sorry..." he murmured quietly.

Benny kept stroking Dean's hair gently, slowly. "I don't see anything for you to be sorry about, Dean.”

"Thanks, Benny" Dean said, his voice just louder than a whisper. "Nobody's ever really done this for me. Not since my mom."

"Well, now you got me" Benny said gently but firmly. "I'm not going anywhere, and neither are you." He separated a little and patted Dean's cheek. "Come on, why don't you go wash your face?" he asked with a little smile. "I'll pick all of this up. We can do anything you want later."

Dean gave him a weak smile and nodded.

"Okay. Where's your bathroom?" he asked, standing and offering his hand down to Benny to help him up.

“Upstairs, go to the right, at the end of the hallway. Huh, take your time" he said awkwardly.

Dean nodded and made his way up the stairs, taking a minute to pull himself together and splash his face with some cold water. When he came back downstairs, he sat and made himself comfortable in the couch.

Benny joined him a couple minutes later. He smiled somewhat hesitantly at Dean. _Talk about something_ , he told himself, _get him out of his own head_.

"So, what would you like? A movie, a show, going for a walk?"

Dean shrugged, looking over at the coffee table.

“We could play a card game. Do you feel like it?" he suggested. He desperately needed to put his attention into something.

"Yeah, I do" Benny answered quickly. "What do you wanna play?” he asked, leaning back on his seat. He crossed his arms and his sleeves slid up, showing them. Benny didn't seem aware of this.

Dean definitely was. His eyes were drawn to Benny's arms and he licked his lips, shaking his head before he could be caught.

“Right. What about... Never have I ever?” he asked, saying the first thing that came to his mind. Although that wasn't completely true: The first thing that he thought were card games, but he didn't know how to play any without cheating. And he didn't want to cheat playing with Benny.

Benny looked at him for a second and grinned amused, but nodded.

“Wait here then, I'll be right back.”

He went to the kitchen and returned shortly with a beer pack. He passed one to Dean and got comfortable again.

"I'm not going to let you drink to the point of being drunk" he warned. “The moment you get tipsy this is over.”

Dean grinned and nodded in agreement, taking one of the beers and cracking it open, ready to use when he inevitably had to drink.

"Okay. You start.”

Playing the game, Dean found out that Benny had had a threesome. And had had sex outside. And had been a voyeur. And had had phone sex. Every time it was Dean's turn, Benny took a sip and his blush kept getting brighter and brighter.

"Ten years of relationship gave plenty of time to try all sort of things", he muttered quietly under Dean's questioning gaze.

For his part, once Benny started going into sexual territory too, Dean started taking sips too. Benny cheerfully told him that there was no sort of judging from his part.

“Right” Benny said on his turn. “So... never have I ever wanted to sleep with a friends's relative.”

For the first time since the game began, Dean blushed brightly, looking away as he took a quick sip of his beer and cleared his throat. He knew Benny was smart enough to figure out that body language, but hopefully he wouldn't be too upset.

"Hey, relax Dean, I said no judging from me" Benny said carefreely. "Unless, of course, it is Elizabeth" he added jokingly, with a teasing smirk.

And then he saw the way Dean reddened further.

"Oh, it is Elizabeth" he said, surprised. For a few moments he didn't know what to do.

“It's just-” Dean started nervously, almost wincing. “Last time we were flirting, it was mostly a game you know. But my mind started wandering, and well, she's hot- I mean she's pretty, and well-”

With every word he said, his blush got brighter and he sank further into his seat.

“Don't worry, man” Benny rushed to say nervously. “I told you last night, I'd have no problem if you and she, huh...”

“I mean, even if something happened... I don't think it would lead to anything serious, you know” Dean commented awkwardly.

Benny remained quiet; he couldn't thing of a single thing to say.

He realized, with mild horror, that despite it being true that he would be mostly OK with it, there was a pang of something he recognized as jealousy in him at the thought of the possibility. He had been the one to take Dean into town and take care of him, and he felt somewhat possessive of him.

He struggled to shake off that unwanted thought. _He's young and he's had it tough,_ he told himself, _you're disgusting for even thinking about it and he doesn't want you in any way. You just broke up with Andrea and aren't thinking straight_.

But despite his efforts, the idea of a naked Dean refused to leave his mind: It wasn't hard, he had seen the boy in swimsuit the day before, and his body was certainly something to be seen... His hands became tight fists on his knees, knuckles going white, his gaze stayed down as he cursed himself.

Dean looked at Benny worriedly, scooting away from him a little. He'd learned from experience that the signs Benny was showing usually ended in a violent outburst.

“Benny?" he said quietly. "Man, are you okay? You're scaring me."

The words broke Benny out of his thoughts. He shook his head, forced his body to relax, and put a smile on his face when he looked up at Dean again.

"Yeah, I'm okay" he assured. "No need to be scared from me, ever, you hear me? It's just that, well, Elizabeth is my cousin, more like my little sister actually. I know she's a grown up and she can choose and if she chose you it'd be okay, but it's still hard sometimes. I, huh, I'd be glad if it was you."

The part where Dean mentioned he wouldn't go for something serious hadn't been registered by his brain at all.

“Um, huh... Never have I ever been part of an orgy?” he said, trying to leave the matter behind.

Benny opened his eyes comically. The game, right, he had completely forgotten. The gulp he took from his beer was much larger than necessary; after what he had just realized, he needed it.

"More times than I can count" he said with an hesitant laugh, trying to lighten the mood too,

Dean laughed genuinely, head falling back.

"Oh my god, that was a total guess. Jesus, okay..." He took a moment to breathe. "So does that mean you've been with guys before...?"

"I told you I prefer women. That means I like guys too, very much” Benny answered giving him a lopsided grin. “So yeah, I've been with plenty of men. Andrea liked to watch me" he added with a laugh.

Dean blushed, feeling a bit of heat stirring in his gut at the thought. He adjusted himself a bit so that even in the unfortunate circumstance that he did get a boner, Benny probably wouldn't be able to see it.

"That's..." He cleared his throat. "Wow."

Benny wasn't sure he liked the direction the conversation was going towards. It was getting awkward.

"You're bi too, right? I mean, you said you thought about sleeping with my cousin, but the night we met you offered me, well... that" he said, going brightly red and unable to bring himself to say it.

"Yeah, I'm bi” Dean confirmed with a chuckle and a nod. “I'm only 18, so I haven't gotten too wild yet, but..." He shrugged. "Thankfully, just about everything I did for money was pretty tame."

"There is nothing to be thankful for about that" said Benny then, his voice becoming far stronger and resolute. "You should have never had to go throught that, and I'm gonna make damn sure you never have to again" he promised.

Dean paused. "I've gotta stay thankful for somethin to stay positive. I think I'm allowed to be thankful that things weren't worse" he said, his voice getting a little dry. "But thanks. I wasn't planning on doing it again anytime soon."

Benny sort of crumbled at that. He hadn't thought about it from that point of view. From Dean's point of view.

"I'm sorry" he muttered. "I'm acting as if I actually knew anything about how you feel, but I don't. I have no idea. I just, huh... Just let me know if you think I'm overstepping in that, alright?" he asked. rubbing his nape awkwardly.

"I will” Dean assured with a soft smile. “And Benny? I really do appreciate it. It's nice to know someone cares about what I'm doing. About what happens to me. Anyway, it's your turn now."

"Yeah, right. I forgot again. So, never have I ever, I don't know, stolen a car?"

Dean shook his head.

"Nah, never stolen a car. Um. Never have I ever... Completed high school" he said, in that moment just trying to find something that he knew would get Benny to drink.

Benny's grip on his beer bottle tightened to the point that his knuckles were white again. He swallowed all that was left of it in one go.

"We're gonna work on that" he promised, and his voice left no room for any arguments.

"Ugh, do we have to?” Dean groaned. “I can't pay for GED classes, and I'm probably not smart enough to pass the test” he whined.

"Yes you are. And yes we have" Benny replied firmly but relaxedly. Before Dean could reply, he spoke again.

"Never have I ever wanted to fuck someone older than me" he said carefully. If he was being honest with himself, that question had a very clear, non-innocent, non-teasing purpose.

If he was honest with himself, which he wasn't.

Dean blushed again and took his beer, taking a longer swig this time. He was silent, afraid if he said anything Benny would start asking questions. And he didn't want Benny to freak out and stop hanging out with him. That would be the worst thing for him in that moment.

Benny looked at Dean, considering. Dean's body language told him that maybe- No, no no no. He wasn't going that way, he didn't want to. Even thinking about it was wrong, deeply so.

"Hmm, I understand. A mature body can push a few buttons, huh?" he said, trying to sound joking. He moved his bottle. "This one is empty already. Wanna keep playing or do you want to do anything else?"

He needed something else, anything else, immediately. The beer was already affecting him, he thought when he realized he had been looking at Dean's lips for far too long.

Benny's stare didn't go unnoticed. Dean raised an eyebrow.

"Do I have something on my mouth?" he asked, looking down. There was a tiny thought that said maybe Benny just wanted to kiss him... But he made that train of thought roll along the best that he could. Benny probably just saw him as some obnoxious kid, and there was no way he'd ever be interested in anyone as fucked up as Dean was.

Benny shook his head. "No, there isn't. I was just lost in my thoughts. I, huh, I'll get those in the fridge" he said as he picked the remaining beers as well as the empty bottles.

"Do you want the TV now?" he asked when he came back.

"Sure. What do you wanna watch?" he asked, sitting criss-cross on the couch. "Cause I'm not picky."

“Neither am I” Benny replied as he let himself fall into the couch next to Dean, separated enough to not touch him. “Just look around Netflix, see if anything catches your eye." He stayed silent for a moment and then added: "I think there's something about batman around there."

"Awesome” Dean said with a bright smile. “But huh... I dunno how to get to Netflix. I've never had it before."

"Here, like this" Benny said, doing it and showing Dean how to. He looked for Batman and put it on. He went to close the curtains, giving the room a lot of darkness, and went back to the couch.

"Aw, man. Batman Begins is the best." Dean said, grinning excitedly. At his side, Benny grinned too just from watching him. "You ever seen it before?”

"Nah, I haven't. But I bet it's gonna be awesome." He let himself relax and his hand fell to the couch, between him and Dean. Dean quickly glanced at it before returning to the screen. Soon, he was immersed in it.

At a certain point, he looked at Benny's hand again, which had unconsciously slid closer to him. He slid his so their fingers were touching, and let Benny take the next move from there.

Benny tensed when he felt his skin contact Dean's. He looked at their hands, then at Dean. The boy didn't seem bothered at all. Or maybe he just didn't care, Benny thought. He bit his lip nervously. What the hell was happening to him? He wasn't this guy, or so he wanted to tell himself.

Nevertheless, he slid his hand up again. It was over Dean's now, and nothing else was happening, not today, not ever.

Dean blushed a little, but smiled as he watched the screen. So maybe Benny was interested. That was the best news he'd ever heard. He kind of wanted to lean on Benny, to cuddle with him, but he didn't want to push his luck.

But then he started to think, to doubt Benny's intentions. He'd just come out of a 10 years relationship the night before and now he was sort of holding hands with someone he'd met less than a week before. And Dean would definitely not be Benny's rebound. As much as he wanted Benny's romantic (and, to be perfectly honest, sexual) attention, he couldn't have it be something passing. As a way to get over Andrea.

He slowly drew his hand out from under Benny's hand into his lap.

Benny hadn't given himself much hope, so when Dean's hand retreated he couldn't feel too disappointed, not that he even knew for sure what he was hoping for. Sighing internally, he retreated his hand too without a comment and drew his attention back to the screen.

Dean could feel the sag in Benny's posture and it broke his heart. He couldn't let Benny think he was completely rejecting him, even if the conversation that was coming would be awfully awkward. He sighed and turned his head.

"I'm not... I don't really..." He shook his head, licking his lips as he tried to piece together the words in his mind. "You just came out of a 10 year relationship. Just last night, and I know that's gotta be hard. And I... I'm not saying no, because I really, really, want to say yes. God, I've never wanted to say yes so bad in my life. But I can't be a rebound. I won't be."

Benny looked at Dean with his mouth sightly open. To be honest, he hadn't thought that there was anything going on outside his own head. Now that he knew it was real, he scolded himself for making any move at all.

"Of course, you're right" he agreed. "You don't deserve that, it's not fair to you, and to be honest I wouldn't have considered any of this yesterday. It wouldn't do any good, not to me, not to you." He licked his lips and then continued.

"And, while I'd like to say yes to you too, I don't think you really want this, Dean. You said before that no one has treated you any good before. And I think that any attraction you think you feel for me is just actually gratitude. So no, I don't think this can or should go anywhere. Forgive me for, huh, for even trying."

Dean narrowed his eyes at Benny, jaw clenching. This was Benny's problem.

"Why do you keep assuming you know how I feel? Why do you keep telling me how I feel?" He huffed, standing from the couch and reaching for his shoes. "It's fucking ridiculous. You're just like every other fucking high-and-mighty adult, you know? And who does that? Fucking jerking me around on a string like that, huh? You made a move on me, man. And that's fine, it was nice. But then when I say I'm interested back you say 'oh, nevermind, I didn't really plan on that going anywhere and I didn't want it to either'."

He huffed again, wiping away some wetness from the corner of his eye. "So yeah. Fuck you too. I'm leaving" he said, heading for the door without looking back at Benny.

Benny panicked. He stood and moved quickly.

"No, Dean, wait!". He ran and put himself between Dean and the door. "Look, I'm sorry. You're right, I'm a jerk. But I really am very confused about you, I- I don't know how you feel, and I'm afraid that I'm taking advantage of you. You said it yourself, plenty of people have tried to. And it is jerkish, high-and-mighty, but I don't know how to do better."

Dean sighed, dragging a hand down his face.

"I don't know either, Benny. I just... I don't think that either of us are in a good enough place to do this right now. I don't know when we will be either." He paused. "I've never even been in a relationship, so I don't know how anything is supposed to work. We could... Give it a week, I guess? Without seeing each other? Do you think that would help you get, like, perspective or something?"

Benny nodded slowly and his gaze flicked from Dean to the floor and to Dean again.

"I like you, Dean, I really do. But I realized it, that I like you in that way, about an hour ago, and I don't think I can make a good decision right now. I think a few days can help us think this through."

He stepped aside and opened the door. "If, well, if you decide you wanna give this a shot, you know how to find me."

Dean nodded, leaning forward and hugging Benny tightly.

"I'll let you know, I promise" he said, letting him go and patting his shoulder. "Um. Do you think you could take me back to the bed and breakfast though? I don't really wanna walk back in the dark" he said a little sheepishly.

"Oh. True, it's getting dark already." Benny stayed silent for a moment, and then he laughed out loud, letting all the tension from the afternoon finally go out. "If this was a movie the scene would be ruined."

Dean laughed too as he followed Benny to the truck and hopped inside.

“If this were a movie, we would've fucked or I would've run home in the rain" he said, smiling over at Benny. "I think this is probably better for us."

Benny hummed in agreement. The comment had made some of the tension leave, but there was still some awkwardness as he silently drove the truck. A couple minutes later he parked in front of the bed and breakfast. He scratched his neck.

"So, I guess we'll see each other sometime, right?"

"Yeah, we will” Dean confirmed with a nod. “In a week, okay? Call me in a week" He repeated, hopping out of the truck and waving at Benny as he went inside. He already knew it was going to be hard for him to be away from Benny for that long, but it was the best thing for them to do.

Benny watched Dean's figure leave. He sighed tiredly, wondering what exactly was happening. He drove back, and when he got home he got a shower and brushed his teeth. He threw himself in bed, letting his mind wander. And his mind wandered towards Dean and his naked body. Groaning, Benny turned and forced his mind somewhere else, but he wasn't successful. He thought of Dean until he fell asleep.

Dean had the same problem, but he definitely didn't have any problem taking care of it in the shower before he went to sleep.

The rest of the week passed slowly, but thankfully, he had a new job and a new life in the building to keep his mind busy.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter! Please comment any thoughts :)

Benny had been thinking a lot about Andrea during the week, but each day it hurt him less and less. He realized that he had finally accepted that it was over, and even though it still made his chest ache, that made him be able to move forward.

 

He also thought about Dean, wondering what the young man would be doing. He thought about what they had said to each other and what was to come. His job gave him too much time to think about too many things, he thought as he wished he had more things to do to keep his mind busy.

 

He had been counting the days, and finally the week came to an end. That afternoon, he sat on his couch and his fingers played with his phone for some minutes. Finally, he took a deep breath and dialed. The answer was immediate.

 

“ _Benny, hi_ ” said Dean, somewhat awkwardly, on the other side without having to ask who it was.

 

“Hi to you too” Benny replied, just as awkwardly. There was a brief silence. “So, it's been a week.”

 

“ _Yeah, it has. Um, a long week_ ” Dean chuckled nervously. “ _Have you been, you know, thinking?_ ”

 

“I have. And I would like to talk to you. Is it fine if I go over there now?”

 

“ _Yeah, sure. I don't have to do anything right now, so that would be great. I'm in in the guest room now, next to Elizabeth's._ ”

 

“Right, I'll be there in a couple minutes then.”

 

Benny hung up and rushed outside pathetically quickly. Five minutes later he was walking into his cousin's house. He nodded at her, she smirked knowingly at him, and he went up the stairs. He stopped for a second in front of Dean's door, but then he knocked.

 

Dean scrambled over to the door and, too, took a moment and a deep breath before opening, and smiled brightly at the man on the other side.

 

“Hey! Come on in, make yourself comfortable” he offered as he stepped away to let Benny in.

 

Smiling back, Benny did what he was told and sat on a chair and Dean sat on the bed. There was a silence, not completely uncomfortable. Benny's fingers played nervously over his knee.

 

“So, yeah, I've been thinking” he finally said to break the silence. “I guess you have, too.”

 

“Yeah. Kinda hard not to with all the free time I've had” he replied with a shrug.

 

“Same here. Not enough customers at the cafe” Benny said with a soft chuckle.  He paused for another brief moment. “So here it is: I'm still not completely over Andrea, but I'm almost there. I think I just need a couple more days. And, well, I'm still attracted to you” he added as a blush appeared on his cheeks. “And I can tell you it's not just to forget her, if you want, I, um, I would like to give this a shot.”

 

Dean positively beamed at those words.

 

“You never mentioned being attracted to me” he teased, tapping his sock-clad feet on the carpet excitedly. “I've been thinking too. I never thought that what I felt for you was just gratitude, but I did some introspection anyway just to not fuck anything up. And I was right. Not that I'm not grateful for everything you've done for me, but that's not why I... Why I like you.”

 

He struggled with the words; he had never been good at feelings, and now that he had to put them into words he found he had a hard time doing so. He licked his lips slowly.

 

“I also was attracted to you from the beginning, that's a given. So, yeah, I really wanna try this.”

 

Benny showed him a smile; it was small, not wide, but still Dean saw so much emotion on it. He stood and walked to Dean and, slowly and hesitantly, raised his hand to cup Dean's cheek. Then he leaned forward and put a small kiss on Dean's forehead. After that, he went down and merely brushed his lips against the other's before pressing further.

 

At first Dean froze and his eyes went wide, but quickly he kissed Benny back, eyes falling closed at the feeling of the other's lips against his own; they were warm, if a little chapped, but they were perfect, because they were Benny's.

 

After a short while, Benny moved away, flushed red. He smiled at Dean as he put his other hand on Dean's cheek.

 

“Dean, I really don't want to ruin this, but I need you to tell you something. I want you to know exactly what it is that I feel for you. There are some things you won't like, and I plan on putting them behind, but I think you should know.”

 

Dean's eyebrows furrowed a bit and he nodded. "Okay, go ahead" he prompted, motioning idly with his hand for Benny to continue. Benny bit his lower lip before he did so.

 

“Look, I know you're 18, you're of age, but I feel protective of you. Not that I think you can't take care of yourself, but you still need a little help. The tourism season won't last forever and then you'll be with no job again, and you're gonna need Lizzie and me to help you, just 'till you're fully settled in, huh? And maybe before we get you to professional teaching we should go over a few things. I hope you're OK with that.”

 

Dean nodded, a thoughtful look on his face.

 

"I'm fine with most of that but having you help me in academics" he replied. "I'll be fine, I know enough. Even if I didn't, I don't want you to think I'm stupid.”

 

“That's OK with me, then” Benny answered with a nod. “I just thought you could use some help on that regard, since you said you didn't finish. And hey, Dean? I would never think you're stupid” he added with a smile.

 

“Thanks, Benny” Dean said with a soft smile. Then he scooted closer to him.

 

“So, now that that's outta the way... What should we do?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

 

Benny blushed a bit but grinned as he put his hands on Dean's hips and leaned closer. “Well, I don't think we should move too fast, but that doesn't mean we can't start to know each other, if that's OK with you.”

 

"Do you think I would've just offered if it wasn't?" Dean inquired raising an eyebrow. “Gonna have to tell me what you mean by 'know each other', though. I don't wanna overstep any boundaries.”

 

"Oh, you know" Benny said as he ran his hands up and down Dean's sides. "Making out, maybe leaving some hickeys. This" he said as his hand found its way under Dean's shirt and ran up his back. "Let's keep our pants on for now."

 

“Sure, I can do that.” Dean hummed and nodded, already leaning into Benny and kissing slowly along his jaw. “I love your beard. Been dying to touch it.”

 

That got a chuckle out of Benny and he looked up to give Dean better access. Meanwhile, his hands went down Dean's back and he caressed his ass briefly before going up again, and he started feeling his front, stopping on his nipples.

 

Dean let out a quiet gasp and a breathy chuckle, but he didn't stop exploring Benny's body with his hands and kissing his jaw. “Sorry. Sensitive there.”

 

“Valuable information” the other commented as he pinched them not too gently. The he moved and pushed Dean gently against the wall. He kissed his lips, his ear, and kissed his way down his jaw to his chin, which he nibbled softly. “Been wanting to touch you too, since I realized I wanted you.”

 

Dean laughed happily as he settled his hands on Benny's waist and, carefully, slid them up his shirt. He wasn't surprised when he was met with firm muscles with a little bit of softer padding on top. He squeezed his side experimentally, trying to see if he was ticklish, and Benny went still for a second as he tried to fight a laugh.

 

“Having a good time, aren't we?” he muttered against Dean's neck. The younger man felt his knees go weak when Benny licked up his neck and hummed happily.

 

Benny nibbled on the skin and then sucked hard. His hand slipped under Dean's shirt and started playing with his nipples as he pressed his crotch against Dean's. Dean's breath hitched.

 

“Mmmm... so good, baby” Benny moaned. Then he stopped and moved a few inches away, frowning a little. “Do you mind me calling you that? Baby? Baby boy?”

 

Dean considered for a moment. "Uh... I dunno. Try it for a minute, lemme see if I like it."

 

“It's a kink I've got” Benny explained against Dean's earshell. “I got many, as you'll find out. But I want you to know that I'm never gonna force you to do anything you don't want, baby.”

 

"Yeah, I know. Just try it for a while” Dean encouraged. “Wanna hear you call me that.”

 

"Will do, baby boy. My beautiful, brilliant boy" Benny said, pressing his forehead against Dean's and brushing their lips together. He paused and then added, not too sure and watching carefully Dean's face, "Daddy's gorgeous boy."

 

The words sent a shiver down Dean's spine and he felt heat pooling in the pit of his stomach.

 

"Yeah, I definitely like that. A lot. Only in sexy situations though" he clarified, nosing at Benny's jaw.

 

"Having you nearby makes the situation sexy enough, I think” Benny replied teasingly and wiggling his eyebrows. He licked Dean's lip and stepped back with a chuckle. “But I really don't think we should get too much into this right now.”

 

Dean whined, pouting at Benny with his bottom lip sticking out. "Why not?" he almost whimpered, but kept his distance.

 

"Well, in the first place, there are guests in the house. In the second place, this is my cousin's house, I'd never hear the end of it if she finds out." He kissed Dean once more. "I think my place is a better choice. When we're more used to each other" he reminded.

 

Dean huffed and crossed his arms, but he admitted Benny had a point. He offered him a shy smile.

 

“Then cuddle with me. Cuddling's OK, right?”

 

"It's more than OK, baby" Benny answered, beaming. He took Dean's hands and walked towards the bed. He fell on it dragging the young man down with him. He kicked his shoes off and laid on the bed, wrapping his arms tightly around Dean and kissing his forehead.

 

Dean was still smiling and let out a little laugh as he snuggled closer to Benny. “Kinda awkward. I'm still hard.”

 

“It's not bothering me” Benny replied laughing too. “Not yet, but in some time that libido's gonna be mighty useful to us.”

 

“You have no idea what you're in for. You've unleashed a monster, you know" he teased. "We haven't even done anything and I've had..." Dean took a moment to count. "I've had 12 orgasms because of you."

 

Benny blinked two times, then he realized what Dean meant. Once more, his face became brightly red.

 

"Oh, huh, that's, I mean, that..." he stuttered nervously. "Me too" he admitted.

 

"Oh, yeah?” Dean chuckled, resting his head on the pillow next to Benny and looking up at him. “What'd you think about?”

 

"You completely naked, lying on your back on my bed. Running my hands over your chest, playing with your hole and your dick, sucking your fingers, that sort of thing. What about you?"

 

"Mm, couple different things. Mostly you just taking me out on the boat again. We go in the little cabin and you take your time with me, licking me open and then stretching me out with your thick fingers. Then you fuck me, nice and slow." Dean paused for a moment. "It's not that I don't like hard and fast too, but that's all I've ever gotten, really, you know? No one's ever done it slow, caring about me.” Dean was stuttering now, blushing and unable to meet Benny's eyes, unable to get his mouth to stop. “It's silly… nevermind.”

 

Benny wrapped his arms around Dean tighter. “Not at all” he said, kissing his forehead. Dean sighed contently and closed his eyes for a moment. They stayed in silence for a couple minutes and then Benny spoke again.

 

“Yeah, that's gonna happen. I'll take you on the boat and I'm gonna lick your ass for hours and make you come a few times. Then I'll make you come a couple more times with my fingers. And only then will I fuck you, so slow it'll last hours. I'll take the whole night making you moan my name again and again. After that I'll give one hour to rest and I'll fuck you on the lake's shore.”

 

Dean's face was bright and heated, and he reached down to gasp his hardening cock.

 

“Benny... you're not helping” he groaned, palming himself.  “I'm gonna have to take a cold shower.”

 

Benny eyed the bulge in Dean's pants and smirked naughtily. His hand went to Dean's crotch, along Dean's, and he started to squeeze and massage.

 

“I said that the pants stay on...  But I think that can be bended a little. “Use the pillow to keep quiet if you need to. Now, baby, keep telling me what you want me to do.”

 

Dean shook his head and his hand went over Benny's and led it in the way that felt best.

 

“I like it when you tell me. Your voice is so sexy and I like your ideas.” He pressed his hips into Benny's and groaned quietly.

 

“Let's see... Like I said, I'd be eating you out for hours, getting my tongue in and out, again and again. You'd have beard burns all over the place, and my drool would fall down your thighs. It'd be so wet we wouldn't even need lube. You'd be completely covered in drool and semen by the time we ended.”

 

The image of what Benny said appeared vividly on Dean's mind. He turned his head to muffle his groan.

 

“And then your fingers” he reminded, bucking his hips. “Those thick fucking fingers.”

 

He took Benny's free hand and brought it to his mouth. He sucked one digit into his mouth and hummed low in his throat. Benny grunted and his massaging of Dean's crotch became faster and harder.

 

“Yeah, my fingers. I'll make you come from them a few times. And when I fuck you, I'll have my fingers in your mouth and you'll lick them so good, like you're doing now. Damn, Dean, so fucking good.”

 

Dean moaned loudly into the pillow. And then there was a knock at the door.

 

He jumped away from Benny and looked at him with wide eyes.

 

“Dean? I need your help, buddy” said Elizabeth's voice at the other side of the door. Quickly, Dean scrambled from the bed readjusting his crotch and fixing his hair before opening the door just a smidgen to see Elizabeth.

 

"Yeah. Hi. What's up?"

 

He could almost feel the tension coming from Benny and saw out of the corner of his eye how he readjusted himself so his hard-on wasn't too visible and sat trying to look as innocent as he could.

 

Despite Dean's own efforts to look innocent as he smiled at her, Elizabeth raised an eyebrow at him.

 

“Is that a hickey on your neck?” she inquired, smirking as she pushed the door open and peeked knowingly at Benny. “Having a good time, cousin?”

 

"I'm a grown up and so is he” Benny said in a gruff mutter, blushing brightly and not saying anything else.

 

“Whatever, B” she replied waving her hand dismissively. “Anyways, I really do need your help, Dean. One of the guests has some seriously heavy luggage, and I can't quite lift it. So splash your face with cold water or something and get downstairs."

 

“Go ahead, I'll be here reading or something” Benny said after Elizabeth had left, not before giving him one last mocking look. Dean sighed as he entered the bathroom to make himself presentable, and kissed Benny's forehead before heading downstairs.

 

Fifteen minutes later he came back to find Benny lying on the bed with a book in front of him.

 

“God, I think they packed freaking rocks” he groaned as he let himself fall next to the other man. “What are you reading?”

 

"Huckleberry Finn" Benny answered, not looking away from the book. He moved to give Dean more room to get comfortable and surrounded his shoulders with his free hand, his fingers idly caressing the young man's head.

 

Dean hummed, content and comfortable in Benny's arms. Safe. He cuddled into him and nuzzled his cheek.

 

“Isn't that Tom Sawyer's friend?”

 

“Mhm. It's one of my favorites. What are you reading?”

 

"Still Carrie” Dean admitted, reaching for said book on the nightstand. “It's pretty good so far.”

 

Benny hummed in agreement and turned his face to kiss Dean's temple. Dean stayed like that for a while, lying beside Benny, until a few minutes later he spoke again.

 

“Hey, Benny. Can I show you something?”

 

“Whatever you want.”

 

Dean got up and went to his dresser. Carefully, he opened the top drawer and took out a box, holding it very delicately, like he feared it might break just by holding it.

 

“This is very serious, okay? I've never showed this to anyone before.”

 

Benny set the book aside and sat up, going serious too. He nodded.

 

Dean went slowly to the bed and sat beside Benny, and gently opened the box. A few soft notes started to play and a little figure of an angel spun in the middle of it. He opened a small drawer beneath the main compartment and pulled out a picture, the colors slightly faded, the edges gone dull with age.

 

The picture showed his family; his mother, his father, his brother and himself. They were sitting on the front steps of their house, Mary holding Sam in a blanket with John at her side and Dean in his lap, leaning over to look at the baby.

 

Dean saw a soft smile on Benny's lips, but he also saw the sorrow in his eyes.

 

“I was right” the man muttered softly, “you were an adorable kid.”

 

He remained looking at the picture and the angel for a few minutes. His hand was on Dean's shoulder and he caressed gently. “They look like a great family” he finally commented. “Thank you, Dean.”

 

Dean nodded silently, and took another moment to look at the picture before putting everything back in the dresser.

 

“We should go to your house” he said sitting on Benny's lap. “So we can have fun without getting interrupted.”

 

Benny nodded without hesitating. He felt like he couldn't say no to Dean about anything right now.

 

"Let's go, then.”

 

They went downstairs. Dean waved at Elizabeth while Benny endured her raised eyebrow and smirk.

 

“So, let's see if I got this right” Dean said when the truck started moving. “Your closest neighbor is Elizabeth. Half a mile down the road.”

 

“You're gonna be able to be loud as you want” Benny promised as an answer, looking at him with a smirk. When they arrived he hopped out and went to open Dean's door, bowing and smirking teasingly.

 

“Such a gentleman” Dean commented as he rolled his eyes, but he smiled when he took Benny's hand. “C'mon big guy, take me inside and I'll let you do anything to me. And I mean anything, I'm pretty kinky.”

 

“I remind you I have 10 more years of experience than you. 'Anything' might be too much for you” Benny replied amused as he closed the door behind him. He made a gesture to beckon Dean closer. “Come here, baby boy.”

 

“Anything for you, daddy.” Dean obeyed immediately, stepping closer and smirking widely.

 

Benny grinned back, a naughty edge to it. Suddenly, he bent down and put his arms behind Dean's knees, lifting him like a bride. Dean hummed, impressed and content as Benny kissed him slow and lazy.

 

"Let daddy take you to bed, huh?"

 

“What're we gonna do, daddy?"

 

“Well, we both got work tomorrow morning, so either I take you there after we're done or we wake up early. Either way, we can't take too long. But you know what? I can do amazing things in a very short time.”

 

As he spoke lowly, he took Dean upstairs. He didn't feel ashamed by the mess his bedroom was. He put Dean on the bed and rushed to climb up with him, pressing their bodies together and kissing him heatedly as the young man moaned against his lips and wrapped his legs around his waist.

 

Benny moved onto his knees to take his shirt off. He passed his hand over Dean's chest, down his stomach to the hem of his shirt and yanked it off. He leaned and moaned as he eagerly sucked at Dean's neck, while Dean trailed his hands down his back to feel his skin.

 

Benny kissed his way down to Dean's chest. He breathed over his left nipple, teasingly, and then dragged his tongue slowly over it. He closed his mouth around it and began to suck and tease with his teeth while his hand took care of the other one, rolling and pinching.

“Fuck...” Dean whined quietly, fingers carding through Benny's short hair. Sometimes he almost forgot just how sensitive his nipples were. The people that paid him for sex had certainly never bothered paying any attention to them.

 

"You like that, boy?” Benny asked and immediately, before getting an answer, closed his mouth around the other nipple and gave it the same treatment, the moan he got from Dean stopping any reply he might get. After a while, he paused for a second and then bit down hard.

 

“Shit” Dean cried out, half in surprise, half in pleasure. Benny laughed against his skin. He looked down to watch Benny and felt his dick twitch at the sight, poking Benny's stomach, and Benny laughed more.

 

Benny looked up at Dean and stared into his eyes, and raising his eyebrows kissed his way down Dean's stomach until he was mouthing at Dean's clothed crotch. Dean moaned again, biting his lower lip as he watched Benny.

 

“N-next time, we're turning tables, okay?”

 

“Not gonna complain about that. Not that I'm complaining about this either" Benny replied, teasing over the jeans and smirking at Dean's reactions. He opened Dean's belt and pulled his pants down. He massaged the bulge on his boxers.

 

“You think my mouth will be enough?” he asked innocently.

 

“Yeah, of course” Dean said quickly, his hips bucking up a little. “As long as I get to return the favor” he added with a wink.

 

“Not complaining” Benny repeated in a low hum. Slowly, he took Dean's boxers down and took hold of his hard dick. Also slowly, he licked from base to tip, then put the head in his mouth and circled it with his tongue. Dean let out a shaky breath, reaching down to grasp Benny's hair.

 

Benny hummed, pleased. He sucked about half of Dean's dick into his mouth, while with one hand he pumped what didn't go into his mouth and with the other fondled his balls.

 

“Touch your nipples” he muttered huskily before going back to work, moaning and sending vibrations through Dean. Among moans of his own, Dean did as he was told, gently rolling his nipples between his fingers and tugging on the nubs.

 

"Shit, Benny.... You're pretty good at this."

 

Benny got Dean out of his mouth to dedicate him a cocky smile, then licked from tip to base, from base to tip and down again. He closed his mouth around one ball and rolled it gently, and did the same with the other before swallowing Dean down again, to the base this time, his nose meeting Dean's pubic hair and his throat relaxing to accommodate Dean. He put his hands on Dean's hips to stop him when he tried to buck up.

 

“I- I see now why ten years more of experience are important” Dean gasped shakily.

 

Benny started moving his head, almost until Dean was almost fully out of his mouth and then all the way down. He did the same repeatedly, quicker and quicker, using his tongue to caress the underside of Dean's length.

 

“Benny, I'm gonna... Gonna come” Dean moaned only a minute later, when he felt the familiar curling of heat in the pit of his stomach.

 

Benny nodded. He moved away a few inches and started pumping Dean quick and hard. He opened his mouth wide so Dean's dick hit his tongue with every stroke. When Dean moaned loudly and orgasmed his load ended up in Benny's mouth. Seeing him moan delighted as he swallowed down all he could was no less erotic than anything else he'd done to Dean. Benny licked his lips to collect what was there and swallowed Dean's length once more. Dean whined a bit, having gone sensitive.

 

“Your turn, big guy” he said, still catching his breath.

 

“Not so fast” Benny chuckled. He went up to kiss Dean deeply, hungrily. He rolled onto his back putting Dean on top of him, surrounding him with his harms and deepening the kiss even more. Dean smiled against his lips and kissed back happily.

 

He couldn't remember the last time he'd felt so content and safe.

 

Benny's hands caressed Dean's back up and down, squeezing his ass every now and then. His kisses became less heated and instead grew calmer, but still just as loving. He kissed along Dean's jawline to his ear.

 

"And now, how about you take care of daddy, huh?"

 

“Of course” Dean hummed, sitting up so his ass was on Benny's still-clothed crotch. He rolled his hips slowly, smirking down at Benny.

 

"Does this feel good, Daddy?"

 

Benny groaned and threw his head back. "It does, baby, a lot" he said as his hands went to Dean's hips. Dean grinned and continued to roll his hips slowly.

 

"Do you want me to keep doing this? Or do you wanna finish in my mouth?"

 

"I- I'd like your mouth" Benny answered with a moan. "I want to send my load down your throat."

 

Dean nodded and rolled his hips one more time, painfully slow, before he crawled off of Benny's lap and shimmied down the bed until his face was even with his crotch. He nuzzled his bulge for a moment, blowing hot air through the fabric of his jeans.

 

"That's it, boy" Benny said hoarsely as his hand went to Dean's hair, caressing it tenderly. "Show me your best."

 

 

Dean hummed quietly in acknowledgment as he unzipped and unbuttoned Benny's jeans, pulling them down just enough to showcase his boxers. He pulled those down too, and went slack-jawed when he saw Benny's cock. It was long and thick, and Dean wanted nothing more than to taste it.

 

He licked his lips as he wrapped one hand around his cock to keep it steady and tongued at the head, licking into the slit with a hum. Immediately Benny fisted his hand in Dean's hair, grunting softly his approval. He closed his eyes and breathed slowly, trying to not lose control and thrust into Dean's mouth.

 

Dean sensed it and rolled his eyes, taking his mouth away from Benny's cock.

 

"You can fuck my mouth if you want, I ain't gonna break" he said, slowly pumping Benny in his hand while he waited for his answer.

 

Without saying a word, both of Benny's hands were on Dean's head, keeping it still, and Benny's hips bucked up as the man moaned. Dean was surprised at the suddenness of the action, but he quickly settled into the rhythm as Benny repeated the motion over and over again, relaxing his throat and moaning around his length.

 

"So good, Dean, so good and beautiful" Benny praised. He kept the rhythm for a while, moaning loudly and tightening his hold on Dean's hair. Eventually, his movements became erratic as he gritted his teeth.

 

"Gonna come now" he warned, "if you don't want to swallow then move now."

 

Dean didn't move an inch, just sucked on Benny's cock with a deep moan. He couldn't wait to find out what Benny tasted like.

 

Benny came with a groan. His hips stilled and a first load was shot into Dean's mouth, some of it hitting his lips and chin. A second later the second load came and did the same.

 

Benny exhaled heavily as his hips fell to the mattress and his hands fell from Dean's hair. After he caught his breath, he said: "That was damn great."

 

“You really think so?” Dean asked with a proud smile, licking the come off his lips.

 

"Of course" Benny answered, beaming. Then he beckoned Dean closer. "Come up here, let me kiss you."

 

"Can't argue with that." Dean replied with a grin a he complied, crawling up next to him and curling into Benny as he rolled onto his side, kissing Dean slowly and lazily. He caressed his cheek.

 

"So, did you like it?"

 

“Yeah, it was great" Dean said nuzzling into Benny's jaw. "We should do it again sometime."

 

"We're definitely going to" Benny replied, nuzzling Dean too. They stayed like that for a few minutes until Benny broke the silence.

 

"What's it gonna be, you sleep here and I take you there early in the morning, or do I take you now? Either way, I think we should get cleaned before we get too comfortable."

 

"Wanna stay here” Dean said against Benny's skin. “And I wanna take a bath in that giant-ass jacuzzi bath tub in your bathroom. I saw it the other day. Is that okay?"

 

"Of course it is. Stay here, I'll go get it ready."

 

Benny kissed Dean's forehead and stood, disappearing into the hall. A few minutes later, he came back and picked Dean up just like he had before. He carried him to the bathroom and gently put him in the warm water, joining him soon after.

 

He poured some soap on his hands and starting rubbing it on Dean's skin. Dean beamed at him as he moved closer, relishing that he was being taken care of for once. Pampered, even. It was something he could hardly wrap his head around.

 

"Thank you" he muttered quietly.

"I enjoy doing it" Benny whispered against his ear, then kissed it gently. "If you allow me, I'm gonna pamper you a lot.”

 

"Never been pampered before" Dean said quietly as he blushed a little. "But I think I like it" he added with a laugh.

Benny hummed, a sound that seemed content, and kept soaping Dean up and then washed it off. He got behind Dean and surrounded him with his arms, lazily lying in the water. Dean made himself comfortable in the other's arms, turning his head to catch his mouth in a quick kiss.

 

For a while they stayed like that; Benny was perfectly content, relaxed and happy and feeling Dean's body between his arms, against his chest. He couldn't think of anything more perfect.

 

Eventually, he muttered against Dean's ear, "Not that I don't like this, but how about we start thinking about going to bed? It's getting late.”

 

Dean hummed in agreement. "Mmmh, yeah. My eyes are gettin' pretty heavy".

 

He moved so Benny could get out from behind him. Benny dried himself with a towel and handed another one to Dean, after which he went to his bedroom for some clean clothes.

 

“You want me to give you clothes or yours will do?”

 

"I wanna wear yours" Dean said without hesitation.

 

In the end Benny found a few things that might fit Dean and brought them to him; a t-shirt, sweatpants and boxers. When Dean put them on, he noticed how they smelled like Benny and smiled.

 

Benny set the alarm and got under the blankets, removing them from the other side of the bed and beckoning Dean to his side with a warm smile. Dean crawled under the covers and cuddled next to Benny as the other's arms immediately wrapped around him.

 

“I've had a nice time today.”

 

“Me too, Dean” Benny replied contently, pressing Dean closer and closing his eyes. He yawned loudly.

Only a couple minutes later Dean was asleep, snoring softly against Benny's shoulder. Benny smiled at him and leaned to brush his lips against Dean's one more time before closing his eyes. Within minutes, he was asleep too.

 

At one point of the night, Dean bolted upright from his sleep, making a fairly loud, distressed sound. Not quite a scream, but something close. The sound woke Benny up; he looked around, confused and still half-asleep, not sure of what was happening, until his eyes set on Dean.

 

He was sweating and shaking, and his eyes darted around the dark room helplessly.

 

“Dean, hey Dean” he called softly, sitting up and putting a hand on his shoulder. “Calm down.”

 

However, Dean quickly moved away from the man's hand, panting and nearly falling off the bed in the process. But his eyes finally focused on Benny's face and he recognized him. He scrambled back towards him and buried his face in his chest.

 

"It's OK, it's OK" Benny repeated again and again in a mutter against Dean's hair, embracing him and rocking him gently.

 

Eventually, Dean's breathing evened out but he continued to cling to Benny, letting him hold him close. He didn't want to let go.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Benny asked quietly when he felt Dean calm down, if not completely, at least mostly. "Or do you want me to forget it?"

 

Dean shook his head. It wasn't a proper answer, but he couldn't bring himself to speak at that moment. His hold on Benny tightened.

 

"That's OK" Benny told him softly, and he just kept caressing him and kissing his head, comforting him as much as he could. Slowly, Dean drifted back to sleep in Benny's arms. He started snoring softly again, but he still kept clinging to Benny's shirt.

Benny sighed, worried but at the same time relieved that Dean had gone back to sleep. Careful not to wake the younger man, he put him on his side again and put the covers over him. He got comfortable again and closed his eyes, putting his arm around Dean and pulling him closer before he, too, went back to sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beep beep, new chapter coming through

Dean groaned sleepily when Benny's alarm went off. He turned over and pulled the covers over his head, unwilling to get up. At his side Benny yawned loudly as he reached his arm out to the alarm, thankfully turning it off. He looked at the wrapped package beside him.

 

"Dean" he called softly, "if you're not feeling alright I can call Lizzie and tell her you can't go. I'm sure she'll understand; she too knows you've had it very hard."

 

Dean took a moment to answer, scooting closer to Benny, still buried under the covers.

 

“Wanna stay here" he murmured. "Only if you're sure Elizabeth won't mind."

 

"Of course she won't" Benny assured firmly. "Just give me a moment to call her."

 

He took the phone and went out of the room. He endured Lizzie's complains about being called so early, then her teasing comments about Dean wanting to stay with him, and after that he told her what had happened that night. Elizabeth left all teasing behind and said that Dean should take some time if he needed.

 

“She doesn't mind” Benny confirmed, walking back into the room. He crawled back into the bed and curled up behind Dean.

 

Dean nodded silently and turned to pull Benny closer. “Come sleep. You're warm. Want you close.”

 

Benny was dying to do two things: One was to ask what exactly it was that Dean had dreamed about, what had affected him so much, but he had promised himself he wouldn't push Dean to tell him anything he wasn't ready to tell.

 

He wouldn't do that, so he did the other thing he was dying to do: Stay with Dean and comfort him. He made himself comfortable behind him and surrounded him with his arms, kissing the back of his neck.

 

Dean squirmed a little in his arms, turning around so he was facing Benny instead. He snuggled up to the other man and relaxed.

 

"Don't you have to work today?"

 

“I got almost an hour 'til I need to get moving” Benny replied. “I can stay here with you.”

 

Dean remained silent for a few moments. “Can I stay here while you're gone?”

 

“'Course you can, baby.” He paused for a second and then added: “But I was thinking that maybe you'd like to come to the café? There's really good food there which will cost less 'cause I work there, it's a nice place, good to read, and since only the first hour and a half is busy I can take you here or to Lizzie's afterwards, if you want. What do you say?”

 

Dean didn't answer until almost a minute had passed, biting his lip as he thought.

 

“Okay. Only if I can have pie and coffee for breakfast” he answered, a soft smile appearing on his face. “And I can finally pay it for myself” he added, obviously excited. 

 

Benny grinned down at him, relieved that Dean had agreed. He didn't want to leave him alone for too long, since he was still visibly affected by whatever dream he'd had.

 

“Yeah, you can. You're an adult.”

 

Dean nodded and showed him a proud smile, which one second after took a mischievous turn. “Thought I was your baby boy?”

 

“And you are” Benny confirmed, voice somewhat husky and changing his posture to a more predatory one. “But only for me, my baby boy. You're an adult to the rest of the world. And besides, I'm proud that you have achieved that” he added, nuzzling him softly.

 

“Good. I don't think this would work otherwise.”

 

"Look, Dean, I'm sorry about all that condescending shit. It was awful strange at first, I didn't know what to do about you, what I wanted. But I mean it, I don't see you as a helpless kid. I don't think I could be with someone I don't fully respect, and I'm with you now, am I not?”

 

As he spoke a soft smile appeared on Dean's face.

 

“I know, and I forgive you.” He cuddled into Benny again and sighed. “We still got an hour, right?”

 

Benny nodded and kissed Dean's forehead, covering them with the blankets. Soon enough, Dean fell in a peaceful sleep, while Benny spent the hour looking at the other's face, thinking about how, in less than two weeks, he had found his way so deep in Benny's life.

 

He gently woke the other man up an hour later, by kissing his lips. Dean mumbled, but after a yawn he was ready to get up.

 

It took them a few minutes to get ready to leave. They talked a bit while they got dressed, and Benny promised that the next time Dean was over he'd have a toothbrush for him. Dean borrowed Benny's copy of _Carrie_ and then they were on their way.

 

“So what do you do at the dinner?” Dean asked once they were in the truck.

 

"I'm at the counter. You know, smile at clients, take their orders, tell the cooks what people want, wait tables and cook sometimes. Nothing too stressful, or interesting for that matter."

 

"I bet you look really cute in an apron though" Dean said, smiling cheekily at him.

 

Benny winked at him and hummed. There were already a few workers in the café when they arrived, but it'd be half an hour until clients started coming in. Dean tentatively scanned the people, a bit mistrustful, as Benny introduced them to him.

 

Benny sat Dean in a private corner and a couple minutes later came to him with a hot coffee, a big portion of pecan pie and a wide smile. “Half price, just for you.”

 

Dean pulled out his wallet and paid as he beamed at him.

 

“Thanks, sir, enjoy it. People are gonna come in soon, so I'll get behind the counter. Call me if you need anything.”

 

Dean nodded. Benny patted his shoulder and went to his place. As he read his book, ate his pie and drank his coffee, Dean watched as Benny put on his most welcoming smile when the first, freshly awoken customers came in demanding caffeine, and took their orders. Every now and then he looked at Dean and their eyes met.

 

Dean went to the counter a while later, when he finished his coffee, and presented the empty mug. “Can I have some more coffee, please?”

 

“Of course, sir” Benny answered with a teasing smile as he poured more of the hot liquid on the mug. “How's it going? You good here?”

 

“I'm fine. The pie was really good.”

 

“Told you we had good stuff here.” Benny grinned proudly. “I'm on the kitchen later, making stuff for the afternoon. You want me to make anything for you?”

 

Dean thought for a moment. “How about cherry pie? If that’s okay.”

 

“More than okay. I'll make you more cherry pie than you can eat.”

 

Dean grinned happily and leaned to peck Benny on the lips. It surprised Benny, and he thought that Dean probably wasn't thinking about what the general public in a tiny town in Louisiana might think about two guys kissing, but a second later he kissed back. Sure, it might get him some nasty looks, but he had never hidden and he didn't get too much trouble. And he was in no way ashamed of Dean.

 

Then Dean went back to reading his book. If the client that came after that was disgusted in any way, at least she was good at hiding it. There were a couple grimaces sent Dean's way, but the man didn't seem bothered by them. Benny did, and he had to remind himself that doing something about it could cost him his job. At least Dean didn't look like he minded, which was the important part.

 

Still, he kept an eye on him, just in case someone decided glaring wasn't enough. He sighed. Two more hours and they could leave.

 

After another hour, Dean got up again to go say hi to Benny and stretch his legs. Then the little bell above the door rang and Dean turned around to look. As soon as he did, his eyes widened and his head whipped back towards Benny.

 

“Benny, I need to hide” he whispered weakly as he hunched his shoulders in an attempt to make himself smaller.

 

Benny blinked, confused and taken completely by surprise. It took a moment for him to link the person coming in to Dean's sudden change. He suppressed his immediate impulse to ask _why_ and nodded, indicating Dean to get behind the counter as he eyed the newcomer, who was looking around and hadn't seen Dean.

 

“Guys? Dean's gonna be here for a while” he said as he opened the kitchen door. Dean quickly stepped in and went to an empty corner, where he couldn't be seen if someone looked through the window. “Treat him good.”

 

Dean waved half-heartedly to the staff and sank to the floor, knees pulled up to his chest as he nervously chewed on his thumbnail.

 

Benny looked at Dean, completely at a loss about what to do and worried sick. He felt the urge to go to him and offer him the support he could, but he was needed outside. After asking a friend to keep an eye on him and looking at him one last time, he turned around and went out.

 

The man, the one who had scared the shit out of Dean, was waiting at the counter.

 

“Morning” Benny greeted carefully, trying to not let his voice give anything away. “What can I get you?”

The man gave him a predatory smile, lips curling up at the side. He made an order in a calm manner and looked over Benny's shoulder,

 

“I think I saw a familiar face slip back there. Is there a Dean Winchester here?”

 

"Dean Winchester, you say?" Benny mused as he wrote down the order and passed it to the kitchen through a window. "Doesn't ring a bell, I'm afraid. Friend of yours?” he asked, his face completely neutral.

 

“Mmm, something like that” the man replied, sliding his credit card across the counter. “I fostered him once upon a time. Good kid."

 

Benny's professional smile almost fell as a shiver ran down his spine. This man gave him the chills, and although he didn't want to know why exactly Dean had reacted that way, he feared the idea in his mind was too accurate.

 

“You're sure you don't know who I'm talking about?” the man insisted, grinning again. “He may be going by a different name. Tall, light brown hair, freckles... Plush, perfect lips? Legs that bow just right?”

“If I have seen him then I've forgotten” Benny replied, his voice harsher than regular.

 

Neither of them said anything else, and a couple minutes later the man was walking out of the place with his order. Benny quickly took care of a couple more customers and then went to the kitchen, kneeling next to Dean.

 

“He's gone now.”

Dean nodded silently, but made no move to get up. Benny sighed and caressed his cheek gently.

 

“My shift ends in forty minutes. I can ask someone to take the kitchen for me today and take you home after that. Can you wait for that?”

 

After a moment of thinking, Dean nodded without saying a single word. Benny squeezed his shoulder and kissed his forehead before going out again.

 

Time passed much slower than usual. All his thoughts were centered on the kitchen, wondering how Dean was doing and wishing he could be at his side. He barely managed to put attention in his clients.

 

“I can't cook today” he told the staff when the wait was over. “I'll do double turn tomorrow.”

 

They nodded and Benny smiled grateful at them. Then he turned to Dean.

 

“OK, how about we go now, huh?”

 

Dean still remained silent as he got up, went to grab his book and walked with his head hanging low, and didn't speak either when they got in the truck. Benny sent him a concerned gaze, suppressing his desire to ask.

 

“Do you want my place or Lizzie's? You know I'm always happy to have you with me.”

 

“Your place” Dean finally said, voice just a hoarse whisper.

 

Benny didn't try to speak to him while he drove, nor when they got there. Once he closed the door, he gently turned Dean around and cupped his face, leaning in to gently brush their lips together, but Dean shook his head and pushed him away.

 

“I don't want to kiss right now. Sorry. I just... It's not you, I promise.”

 

“You don't have to apologize” Benny assured, stepping back and angry at himself for that little hint of hurt in his chest. “What do you want to do? I can make lunch, if you're hungry.”

 

“Thanks, but I'm not hungry. I'm gonna go lie down, maybe take a nap.”

 

Dean went upstairs, looking exhausted. While he slept, Benny was in the living room, alert in case Dean needed him. He tried to read, but gave up about ten minutes later; he was unable to focus on it, too worried, mind turning around about the guy at the café. He hoped he decided to leave soon.

 

An hour and a half later, Dean went back downstairs, looking as if he had slept very little. He made himself comfortable on the couch, beside Benny. Benny smiled at him, but said nothing; he still didn't understand Dean completely, but he knew that if he needed comfort he'd say so, so he went back to his book waiting for Dean to talk.

 

For a few minutes they remained like that, but then Dean grabbed Benny's book and set it aside, proceeding to bury his face in his shoulder. Benny pressed his face to Dean's hair and rubbed his hands up and down Dean's arms and back, offering the comfort he could, letting him know he was there.

 

A while later, Dean wasn't sure how long, he pulled away.

"I don't think you could understand how bad he is, Benny. I really don't."

 

"I don't care how bad he is" Benny replied, still caressing soothingly, "'cause he's not going anywhere near you. I'll beat it into him if I have to. You think he has come here just for you, or is it a coincidence?"

 

Dean sighed tiredly and shrugged. “It's hard to say with him, but if I had to guess, he found some way of tracking me. I dunno. It's..." He shook his head. “That day we were on the lake, you didn't pay any attention to the scars on my back, did you?"

 

"I noticed them, but you weren't too open to tell me anything back then, so I didn't ask." Benny's hand traced one of those scars over Dean's shirt. "He did them, didn't he?"

 

His voice seemed calm, but the anger underneath it was almost palpable. Regardless, his touch on Dean remained completely gentle.

 

"He said he fostered you once. Dean, how..." Benny's voice failed him and he had to take a few breaths before continuing. "How old were you?"

 

Dean's jaw tightened for a moment before he spoke. He looked away from Benny, unable to meet his eyes.

 

“10.”

 

Benny went completely still and his hands became fists against Dean's body, his teeth gritted, all his body tense. For a couple minutes he remained silent.

 

"I'm going to kill him" he said eventually, his voice barely above a whisper. "If he's still in town, I swear I'm going to kill him with my own hands."

 

Dean looked at Benny, surprised. He had never seen anything but kindness in him before.

 

“I can't say I would stop you if you tried. He probably is still in town; he's got some way of knowing roughly where I am. He won't leave until he finds me or gets some hint I'm somewhere else.”

 

"Dean, I want you to tell me if he even looks at you, you hear me? The littlest thing and you come to me."  He put his hand on Dean's head, caressing it gently, and bit his lip nervously. "Dean, you know I don't want you to tell me anything you don't feel you are ready to tell, but I think it would be good if I knew what happened. Were you with him until you were of age? Only for a time?"

 

"About three years” Dean started, his voice relatively strong. “I got there just after I'd turned 9, and then I left when I was about to turn 12."

 

Benny didn't stop the comforting, soothing motions for a second as he listened. He felt the urge to go find the man and strangle him.

 

"If he's still after you, then how did you leave? If the system took you away because he was abusing you, then why isn't he in jail?"

 

Dean shook his head. “No one knew he was abusing me. It was something else... I don't remember, and no one explained it to me either. I was just glad I got out of his house.”

 

“And since you're of age now, law isn't gonna protect you” Benny mused thoughtfully. Then he shook his head. “Don't worry, Dean, he's never putting his hands on you again. I swear.”

 

Dean hummed. He just stayed like that, protected in Benny's arms, for a while. The next time he spoke, he said, “Can we watch Dr. Sexy?”

 

Benny chuckled a bit and gently pushed Dean away. He put the TV on, and remembering the last time they had watched it together, he pointedly put his hand over Dean's. He raised it to his lips and kissed it, earning him a smile from the young man.

 

It was good to see Dean relax, Benny thought as he relaxed too. Yeah, that guy was a problem, but they could afford to forget him for a while. Dean needed it. By the time the episode ended, Dean was so occupied being frustrated with it to worry about anything else. Benny laughed and pulled him into a hug, teasing.

 

Dean took advantage of his position to kiss slowly under Benny's jaw, humming quietly. “Wanna have some fun, daddy?”

 

“Daddy always wants to have fun with his baby boy” Benny replied immediately, running his hands down Dean's back and squeezing his ass. “How far do you want to go?”

 

“How far do _you_ want to go?”

 

“Well, my boy” Benny grunted, “today, daddy's gonna eat you out.”

 

-0-o-0-o-0-

 

“Hey, handsome” Dean said as he slipped in the shower behind Benny. The marks of beardburn on his asscheeks were still bright red, as were the marks from when Benny had spanked him. He couldn't help noticing that Benny's ass was still a bit shiny from Dean's spit, the water not having washed it away completely.

 

Benny rolled his eyes. "Sorry, beautiful, I'd love you to go at it again, but I'm afraid my cousin might try to behead me for kidnapping her new employee this long.”

 

He finished washing the soap off and stepped out, grabbing a towel. “Get yourself properly clean while I get you some clothes.”

 

Dean pouted a little but did as Benny had asked. As he started soaping up, he started to sing too, Benny laughed on the other side before he started to sing along.

 

“You sing nice” Dean commented as he dried himself a couple minutes later, smiling at Benny with a shine on his eyes.

 

Benny blushed and looked away a bit. “You sing better” he muttered.

 

“But yours is deep and sweet. It's like honey, if it was a sound.”

 

Benny's blush became more intense, lips in a thin line, and said nothing. Dean laughed softly and let the matter rest.

 

“You good to work tomorrow, right?” Benny asked, suddenly concerned. It took a moment for Dean to answer.

 

“As long as he's not there I can deal with it” he finally said, and finished putting his clothes on.

 

“If he shows up, you tell Lizzie and then call me.”

 

“Yeah, OK” Dean replied, swallowing thickly. His hands twisted nervously. “What... What if he gets me secluded?”

 

Benny stepped forward and cupped his face, gently caressing his cheeks.

 

“He won't” he stated firmly. “Me and Lizzie will keep an eye on you, and if he tries coming in we'll kick him out. He'll have to leave sometime, right?”

 

Dean shook his head. “You don't know him, Benny. You don't know how he works."

 

"You're making him sound like he's a mob boss or something” Benny huffed. “Dean, last time you were with him, you were a kid and couldn't protect yourself. Now you're an adult, and you've got me. I will beat him if that's what it takes.”

 

Dean scowled and pulled Benny's hands away.

 

"I know what I'm fucking talking about, Benny. Don't try to belittle me."

 

 "I'm not belittling you, Dean” Benny replied, his expression mirroring Dean's. “But I need you to realize that you're not powerless against him. If you don't believe that yourself, then there's little we can do."

 

Dean turned around and crossed his arms, taking another moment before speaking.

 

“He wants me to hurt him. It's what he wants. That I... Become him.”

 

Benny blinked at him, surprised and confused.

 

“He wants what?” he inquired, not sure he had understood. “You mean he's a masochist?”

 

“No, not like that” Dean said shaking his head. ”He wants me to become like him. He wants to... Corrupt me. Wants me to enjoy hurting other people. And he won't care if that person's him. He'd probably prefer it, really, cause I'd be giving him attention."

 

Benny could feel his stomach turn as a very unpleasant feeling settled on it. His lips became a thin line.

 

"How is that psycho not in an asylum? Or jail?" He balled his hands into fists. "I mean it, if I see him again I'll beat him until he cannot even talk.”

 

"I don't want you to get in trouble, Benny. You could get arrested. And if you got arrested you get fired and everything crumbles down.” He sighed, tired. “Listen, if I see him I'll tell Lizzie and call you, but don't do anything rash.”

 

Benny sneered. No way he was going to stand aside, but he thought it'd be sensible to let the matter drop for now. He sighed tiredly; he wanted to protect Dean, protect him from everything, but neither it was completely possible nor Dean would appreciate it.

 

“Let's just get going, shall we?”

 

The ride was silent. When they parked, Benny reached for Dean's hand and squeezed it, smiling encouragingly at him. “Want me to go inside with you?”

 

“I told you, I'll be fine. I'll call you if he shows up.”

 

He hopped out of the car. Benny didn't look away until he was inside. Then he sighed and started driving away.

 

Inside, the first thing Dean did was to go see Elizabeth.

 

“Hey” he greeted, giving her a tired, weak smile. “Sorry I was gone today. Just a little under the weather.”

 

“It's alright, I didn't have trouble” she assured, smiling sweetly at him. “Benny told me you weren't feeling good. Hope you feel better soon.”

 

Dean nodded slowly. He licked his lips, and a moment later he leaned over the table. When he spoke, he did so in a whisper.

 

“Has anyone named Alastair checked in?”

 

“Why, yes, this afternoon. He got a room for three days. Why, anything wrong?”

 

Dean paled immediately. He suddenly felt dizzy and he felt like his vision became less clear. He anxiously looked around, making sure he wasn't nearby. He took a deep breath; he knew he could trust her.

 

“He abused me when I was little” he explained shakily. “I don't know what to do.”

 

“He what?!” Elizabeth whispered, eyes widening and going pale too. “He went upstairs and I think he's still there” she explained, eyes nervously going to the stairs. “I'm sorry, Dean. His room is the one next to yours. I didn't know.”

 

Dean went so tense he was rigid. He nodded almost mechanically, swallowing dryly.

 

“Um, OK. Right. I... Can I stay in your room with you? I'll sleep on the floor, I don't care. I... I just don't want to be alone, please. Or, or maybe If it's OK Benny can stay with me in my room? Because... It's just that... He is...”

 

Dean realized he was rambling by that point. He was so afraid he was shaking, and he hated Alastair for being able to make him feel like a defenseless child again.

 

Elizabeth tried to calm him down, assuring him that he wouldn't be alone. She didn't success too much, but Dean appreciated her effort, and was thankful when she got the phone and called Benny. 'Benny, come here. That Alastair guy is here', she said as soon as he picked up.

 

“He's on his way” she informed Dean after finishing the call. “He swore he would skin him if he tried to touch you.”

 

Dean chuckled humorlessly, his smile looking more like a grimace, but at least some color was coming back to his face.

 

“Can I stay with you while he-”

 

Dean's words stopped Dean when he heard steps. He slowly turned around and saw the man from his nightmares walking in. Their eyes met Dean's blood ran cold. A malicious, delighted smirk slowly made its way to Alastair's face. His eyes shone as he walked closer.

 

“My, my... Look who's here.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry! This chapter has taken far too long, but many things have been happenning on our lives. We hope you can forgive us and enjoy :)

Alastair's hand reached out for Dean, and since the boy was too scared to react, shaking and frozen where he stood, he didn't move. The hand settled on his cheek and caressed with something akin to tenderness.

“It's been a while since I saw you. I missed you, Dean.”

“L-leave me alone” Dean demanded as he stepped back, his voice shaky and quiet, with much less conviction than he'd hoped to have.

“Aw, but Dean, we have so much to catch up on.” Alastair tilted his head sightly, his grin becoming amused and mocking. He spared Elizabeth a quick glance. “Why don't we go somewhere more private?”

“No. There's nothing you can't tell me r-right here.”

Dean glanced at Elizabeth briefly, looking for help, but the woman had her hands over his mouth, staring in shock.

When Alastair stepped forward, his chest almost touched Dean's. He raised an eyebrow.

"My, Dean. It almost looks like you aren't glad to see me. What's wrong, have you forgotten all the fun we had?"

The fear almost made tears rise to Dean's eyes, but he wouldn't let Alastair see him cry; he took a moment and composed himself. He pushed Alastair away by his shoulders. He felt that, if he needed to, he could take the man on a fight. He was certaily hoping it didn't get to that, and wasn't completely sure he'd get his body to move, but he thought he could.

“Fuck off.”

“My, Dean, that's rude” Alastair commented, eyebrows up, interested as much as surprised. “When did you vocabulary become so crude? And since when are you so unpolite? Has there been any negative influence around you lately?"

“I can't really think of a more negative influence than you. And I can say whatever the fuck I want.”

"Calm down there, boy. You know how much I love you, I can't help but worry about you."

Dean scoffed derisively. He felt like spitting in the other's face. “You can think you love me in yout own sick, disgusting way. But you don't know a single thing about what real love is.”

“And I guess you do, then?”

Alastair didn't even try to deny it. Dean knew for a fact that he was fully aware of how sick his thing for the younger man was, and he just didn't give a shit about it. His hands closed around Dean's wrist, pressing hard enough to hurt.

"Tell me, when have you learned? In the less than two weeks that you have been here?" he asked, his voice amused and mocking.

Dean's mouth opened and closed, his eyebrows furrowed as he looked away. He wasn't sure Benny loved him, and he wasn't sure he loved Benny either. But he knew they cared about each other, and that was something he cherished and held very close to his heart. But was is love? Would it ever be? Dean didn't know.

Because Alastair was right. He didn't know much more than the other man did.

“See?” the older man asked, raising his chin in satisfaction. “You speak of things you don't understand. That man at the café before? You're screwing him, right? There's no other reason he'd bother to hide you."

"We're dating." Dean corrected, tone biting. "It's not just sex."

"'It's not just sex', of course. So you two _are_ screwing, and just like I said, less than two weeks. Maybe he does have some sort of fondness for you, but at the end of the day you're nothing more than a fuckhole. That's how people are, Dean, you should know that by now."

No sound came out of Dean's mouth, even though he tried to speak. He took a step back.

Alastair was repeating all what the little voices in his head he kept pushing away said. He tried to deny it, but... Benny had never actually taken him on a date, a proper date, had he?

_He pretended to care, but he just wanted in Dean's pants,_ Dean's mind said. _He was nice so Dean would trust him. He wanted to go slow so Dean would be fooled._ It made so much more sense seeing it that way.

“No” he said, shaking his head. “No. You're wrong. Benny cares about me.”

Just in the moment Alastair was going to reply, Benny rushed in through the door. Elizabeth, who hadn't been able to make herself step in, sighed in relief.

Benny saw Alastair and growled, stepping towards him.

“Get away from him unless you wanna lose all your skin, you sick bastard.”

The grip on Dean's wrist looseden, but the man didn't let go as he faced Benny.

"Oh, Dean. I see now where that bad influence came from." He smirked mickingly at Benny. "Am I supposed to be scared?”

“You're assaulting him right now” the other grunted through gritted teeth. “I'm sure law wouldn't mind if I forced you to leave him alone, and believe me, I can make that hurt."

After a second of gauging Benny, how angry he was and how strong he looked, Alastair pulled his hands away casually, but didn't step away.

"We're just having a nice little conversation."

"I'm afraid the conversation's over.

Benny stepped forward and put himself between the two men. After shoving Alastair away, he took Dean's hand and headed to the stairs. Dean pulled his hand away but followed.

"Come on, Dean, I'll sleep with you tonight."

"Remember what we talked about, Dean" Alastair called after him on his way up the steps.

The sound of a door being violently closed came from upstairs. Only Alastair and Elizabeth were left.

Elizabeth was honestly scared of this man; not only his exchange with Dean, but everything about him screamed danger.

“You- you should leave as soon as possible” she stuttered nervously.

"I paid for three nights, so I'll be staying for three nights, dear” Alastair stated calmly. He gave her a cold, contemptuous smile and then turned around, going up the stairs and closing himself in his room.

Elizabeth looked at the direction in which he had left, tense but a hint more relaxed than before. She sighed, relieved she wasn't seeing him anymore.

She was angry, mostly at herself. She hadn't been able to react when Dean needed help, nor had she been able to stand up to the man. It was true that he had paid three nights, but that was her house, and she couldn't let him do whatever he wanted.

And yet, she couldn't help but think that whatever he wanted was precisely what he was going to do.

-0-o-0-o-0-

Inside his room, Dean was shaking like a leaf, unsure of what to do with himself. He wrapped his arms around himself, but that didn't help. Benny occupied himself getting ready for bed, giving himself some moments to calm down; he was frowning and tense and he didn't think that seeing him angry was what Dean needed right now.

When he was done, he approached Dean and placed his hand on his shoulder.

"Dean, listen to me. I am here, Elizabeth is here, and there are other guests. People in town are starting to know you. He can do nothing to you, alright?"

However, Dean swatted his hand away and stepped back, looking to the floor.

"You don't really care about me" he said quietly but firmly, and in his head, Alastair's voice overlapped with his own words. "You just... You pretend to care so you can use me. You just... You just want to fuck me and then leave me."

The pained grimace that Benny's face became showed that if Dean had punched him it in the stomach, it wouldn't hurt more. He knew he had gotten Dean to believe him, but now...

“Don't say that, Dean" he asked, his voice shaking a little. "I don't know why you'd say that, but it's not true. I care about you."

"How am I supposed to know? How... He was right, wasn't he? There's no reason you're any different than anybody else. Cause I don't know the first thing about love."

"Dean, please, listen to me" Benny pleaded, taking a hesitant step ahead, "I care about you. Don't say that you don't know about love, because I know you care about me too."

“I don't know if it's love. How am I supposed to know? I...”

Dean knew he was grasping at straws. He just didn't know what to feel, what to believe. He was afraid and scared that what Alastair had said was true. But after a few moments, his shoulders slowly sagged and he stepped forward, leaning against Benny's shoulder and clinging to him. Benny pressed his lips to his head, hushing soothingly, and closed his arms around him.

“Tell me, Dean, what do you feel when you're with me?”

“...I feel safe. Safe and happy” Dean answered after a few moments of calming down. “Like I never ever wanna leave your side.” There was another pause. “I feel like I'm at home, like you're the home I never had.”

Benny separated a bit, just enough so he could look at Dean's eyes and smile gently.

“Sounds like love to me. That's what I feel when I'm with you, too. I want to be with you and see you happy.”

Dean's eyes were big, hopeful, and maybe a little wet. “Really?”

“Of course.” Benny's answer was a bit nervous. It was a big thing he was saying, after all. “Look, there's a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone. I love Lizzie but I'm not in love with her, you know? And I, um, I do love you, I'm happy when you're happy and I love spending time with you. And I'm in love with you. I... I don't know how far it goes just yet. But it's only a matter of time until I'm completely at your feet. I'll get there. I _want_ to get there.”

Slowly, Dean's expression was replaced by a hesitant, soft smile. The thought of Benny being in love with him, loving him, made him feel warm and happy. He tried to say the same words, but they wouldn't come out of his mouth.

“I'm sorry about that. I should've known that you're not like he said.”

“Don't be sorry.” Benny shook his head. “He's done a lot of harm to you, I'd be surprised if you could just shrug him off. But promise me you'll think about this, OK? He's only lying.”

Dean nodded, smiling at him once more, and dragged his hands over his face to wipe away any hint of tears. He shred off all of his clothes except his boxers and crawled under the covers of the bed.

“Cuddle with me.”

Benny nodded and soon joined Dean under the covers. He opened his arms invitingly and Deam scooted into the embrace, burying his face in his chest and breathing his scent in. There was something soothing about it.

"Do you have to work tomorrow?"

Benny hummed a yes, and Dean remained silent for a few moments before talking again.

"I don't know what to do. Alastair's here and he's not gonna leave easily, but Lizzie probably needs my help. I can't just stay in my room until he's gone, you know?"

“I feel he might try to corner you here if you did” Benny commented, biting his lip thoughfully. “Would someone else's presence stop him from attempting anything?”

Dean scoffed at that. "You saw what he was doing in front of Lizzie. It wouldn't stop him. And even then, there are so many free corners and rooms that he'd still probably be able to get me alone pretty easily." He sighed tiredly, going closer into Benny's chest. "I could carry a weapon, but I doubt Lizzie would appreciate it.”

"I'm still willing to beat him to a bloody mess" Benny offered, with only a little hint oh humor on his otherwise completely serious voice.

"I'd do it myself if it wasn't what he wanted. I'll let you do it if he tries to hurt me, huh? Hurt me bad.”

“He already has, Dean, and he hasn't paid for it.”

Benny spoke quietly. He was pressing Dean tight against his body, as if he needed to make sure he was OK, and his hands combed gently through his hair. He sighed tiredly after some moments.

“I'm not gonna let you deal with him tomorrow, and I'm afraid he might try to hurt Lizzie if she does. We need to call the police.”

"They won't arrest him for anything now, not anything that will keep him for more than a few months. If they don't let him go with a warning, that is. I can't prove now anything of what he did to me, and even then the statute of limitations would nearly be out by now. I want a restraining order, but we won't get that done in a single day.”

“This is Lizzie's house. She lets people stay here for money, but she doesn't have to. We can force him to take his money back and leave us alone. You'll stay here or you'll be with me until the order is done. And I have a couple buddies on the police station, too, could get them to speed the process up. I was drinking with them the night I left my number on that truck stop.”

Dean chuckled a bit, along with Benny, as he remembered just how they had met. Afterwards he fell silent for a couple minutes as he thought about Benny's proposal. Then he nodded.

“That would work, yeah.”

“We'll do it tomorrow morning, then. I'll call the café and tell them I'll be a little late.”

Dean nodded again, curling into Benny. The man authomatically tightened his grip and they both shut their eyes. Benny yawned.

“Sounds good...” He paused. “I'm tired.”

“Sleep, Dean. I got you.”

Within minutes, Dean's breathing had evened out, indicating he had fallen asleep. Benny kept stroking his hair lovingly, and he only let his hold loosen a little bit when, a little while later, he fell asleep too.

Through all the night, he didn't remove his arms from around the younger man.

-0-o-0-o-0-

“You have to kick him out, Lizzie” was Benny's greeting the next morning, as he walked into the kitchen. Dean had gone to a corner, too absorbed and away to hear their words.

The purse of Elizabeth's lips deepened when she heard those words. She didn't look away from the breakfast she was cooking when she spoke. “I'm not good at handling conflict, Benny. He's not gonna go just because I tell him. I don't know how to deal with this.”

She paused, took a deep breath before finishing.

“I couldn't even step in to help Dean when he needed it. I didn't do anything.”

“Hey, Lizzie” Benny replied, making his voice much nicer than it had been a moment ago. He stepped closer to her. “He's a scary man, and that was quite the situation. I don't think many would've been able to react, Dean definitely seems to think that.”

“Maybe, but that doesn't make me any better to handle this. Definitely not gonna intimidate him with my looks.”

“Well, you can't let him intimidate you, either” Benny pointed out leaning a bit towards her. “This is your place and he has no power to stop you from kicking him out if you want to. If he refuses to leave either we call the police or I beat it into him.”

The was a silence in the conversation. Elizabeth kept working on breakfast, although some of the tension of her body was gone, and Benny watched her waiting for a reaction. Eventually she stopped her hands and nodded, directing a little smile at her cousin.

“You're right. He can't force me to let him stay. I'll tell him to go away when he comes down.”

“That's my girl!” Benny kissed her forehead. “I don't want you to face him alone, though. I'll be with you. I'm not gonna let him do anything to you.”

“I know you won't.”

She sent him out to the dining room, where he watched over Dean once he got functioning. He went in and out a couple times, carrying breakfast and making small talk with the clients. He seemed more relaxed now, but his gaze, just like Benny's, went to the door often. Any moment now Alastair would come down.

And one of the times Dean came in, Alastair was there. He froze for a second, eyes going wide. He shook his head a little and went right back in into the kitchen, a second later being replaced in the room by Elizabeth, who went directly to Alastair and said firmly:

“Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to gather your things and leave."

The tall man raised an eyebrow as the corners of his lips turner upwards into a slight sneer.

"Why would I do that? You got my money, I get a room. It's not that hard to understand."

“You can have your money back for the other two nights you paid, but this is my property and I'm asking you to leave. Your presence is upsetting to my employee and myself.”

“You're asking me that, but I'm asking you to reconsider. I will give you more money, if that's what you want.”

"I don't remember saying this was negotiable. I don't want your money, I want you to get your things and find somewhere else to stay” she repeated, standing as tall as she could. "If there's a problem, I can call the police."

“Oh, alright, alright” the man answered, waving his hand and not looking the least bit concerned. “No need to be dramatic. But you're gonna allowe me breakfast at least, or is my presence so disgusting it'd make people sick?”

Looking around, Elizabeth found some of the patrons staring. She didn't want to make any more of a scene than she already had, but she didn't want him to stay around Dean either. She thought for a moment.

"You can have breakfast, but you leave immediately after that."

“Got it, got it, no need to repeat.”

The woman nodded, satisfied, and gave him her back. She thumbed up at Benny on her way back to the kitchen, and he smiled brightly and proudly at her. After that, Benny inspected Alastair carefully for a little while, ignoring the man's sneer in his direction. Eventually he stood up and walked up to his table, sitting in front of him.

“Can I help you?” Alastair inquired, voice showing a hint of irritation.

Benny flashed a hating smile at him. “Just wanted to let you know you shouldn't get your hopes up planning to do anything. Dean's going to fill a restraintment order."

Alastair blinked at Benny, sightly in disbelief. “He wouldn't do that” he stated.

Benny's grin took a menacing hint as he leaned towards him."Maybe he's stronger than you think. Maybe he just needed a little support to realize you have no power over him."

"And who's giving him that support, hm? You? Your cousin? Dean's a resourceful boy, you must know, having lived his life the way he has. Surely you can see he's using you?”

Benny's expression was unchanging as he shifted and leaned back, crossing his arms.

“Sorry, man, but that won't do the trick with me. You may have gotten Dean to doubt, but you literally have no efect on me other than nausea. Why would I believe any word of what you say? He's taken nothing I haven't willingly offered first."

"Of course he hasn't, he's not dumb and won't let you realize he's using you. You're an easy target and needy people like Dean can see it a mile away."

Benny snorted and shook his head. "I told you, not gonna work. He's not using me, and you know what? I wouldn't care if he was.”

Alastair rolled his eyes and sneered. And then, out of the corner of his eye, he saw Dean slipping out of the room and going upstairs. He mantained his expression controled and kept his attention on Benny.

"Very well, then, if that's what you want to believe. Don't worry, I will leave this place soon. It's not like I've been treated brilliantly.”

He stood up with one mocking look at Benny and walked out of the room. He lost no time gathering his things – he always had them ready to move fast – and then he approached the door of what he knew was Dean's room. He opened it just one second before Dean did it from the inside.

Dean's breath hitched and his eyes widened, but he only made a gesture of stepping back before he made himself firm and glared at the man's eyes.

“You're supposed to be leaving, asshole."

"I am leaving, kid” Alastair replied unconcerned as he invited himself in, looking around. “I just thought I'd have a little chat with my boy before that.”

Dean stayed behind, glaring furiously "Get out of my room."

"Come on Dean, we're alone now" Alastair replied, giving him a smile that was like a shark's. "We can talk plainly; I know some things about you that you don't want them to know, right? So give me five minutes with you. Five minutes of just talking; that's all I'm asking for. For now."

“You could tell Benny anything, and he wouldn't care.” Dean's voice was strong, but there was a slight shaking in his hands as Alastair's words brought a particular memory back to his mind. “I don't care, so get out.”

"Is that so?" Alastair mutteres, walking up to him and almost reaching out to caress Dean's cheek, but dropped his hand before touching him. "Are you telling me you don't remember what first drew my attention to you? What made me realize we are the same? Don't lie to yourself, kid, you know it better than I do.”

Dean's blood ran cold and his shaking worsened, and he hated how Alastair's face showed that disgusting triumphant smile. He swallowed around the lump in his throat.

“Five minutes, not a second more. If you come any closer to me I'll run and have Benny beat you to death.”

Alastair's grin widened triumphantly and he nodded at him in a mockery of gratitude. He turned around and started looking through Dean's things.

“It might not even be that long. I just need...”

The man found what he was searching: He saw Dean's box on a shelf, opened it and, before Dean could react, he took something from it. He slowly turned around and showed the other his price: The picture of Dean's family before the fire.

“That's all I need for now, my child. Don't worry, it's gonna be around. As long as I am, I mean.”

Dean made a panicked gesture to go get it, but froze in his movements as soon as he saw Alastair ready to break the pic in half. He cringed when just the littlest inch started to tear.

“No! No, please, no. I'll do anything, just don't take it. Alastair, I'm asking you.”

"You will indeed do whatever I want, and right now what I want is you to move aside.”

Dean complied. Seeing that he was being obedient, Alastair took the box itself and put it with his things. He made a motion to pet Dean on his way out, but changed his mind.

“See? Just like I said. Less than five minutes and I haven't touched you. Have a good day, kiddo.”

The door closed on Dean's face. He was pale and numb, and only reacted a couple minutes later, sitting on the bed almost mechanically, eyes blank. He hunched, hid his face on his hands, and after a moment of shaking the first tear ran down his face.

 


	8. Chapter 8

Benny looked up when he felt Dean approaching. His smile died on his lips, replaced with concern when he saw Dean's face, lost and almost broken, eyes slightly red from having cried.   
  
“Dean? What is it?”   
  
“I... Benny, he took it. He took it. Alastair took my picture, and everything in my box. He has it.”   
  
The younger man sat heavily on a chair next to Benny's. He looked lost, and Benny's eyes widened, his fists shook with rage and hate.   
  
“What?” he hissed, and a second later he stood up. “He went into your room? I'm going to find him and I'm going to kill him, and you'll have it back. How did he get in? Why didn't you come to me immediately?”   
  
"He just stepped in while I was on my way out” Dean explained, looking away. “I tried to make him leave, but he... He threatened me.”   
  
He had been about to tell him exactly what he had been threatened with, but just bit his lip and shook his head. No way he was telling Benny, ever. He sighed heavily.   
  
"I just want my picture back and box that. I need them, Benny.”   
  
“Don't worry, you'll have them” the other assured, bending down to kiss the top Dean's head. “We'll catch him and get them, then we'll go for the restraining order.”   
  
Dean nodded weakly and Benny smiled feebly at him. He went to tell Elizabeth where they were going and there he and Dean were off.   
  
Other than Alastair having told Dean he'd be nearby, they had no clue where he might have gone.

They first headed to a motel twenty minutes out of town, but they had no luck there. By the time they had checked the third option, Dean started to get anxious.   
  
“What if he does something to them?” he mused weakly to himself, biting his lower lip.   
  
“Did he say something when he took them?”   
  
“He just said that I'd do anything he wanted as long as he had them.”   
  
“Well, it clearly ain't working, is it? Didn't he say anything else, what he wanted, any threat? Even just implicit?”   
  
“No.” Dean shook his head weakly and got lost on the sight out the window. “But I'm sure he has a plan, he always does. He's like that.”   
  
A low, angry grunt came from Benny, his fingers turning white around the wheel. “It's not gonna work, in any case, whatever it is. We'll get rid of him and it'll be like he had never come. I promise.”   
  
The conversation died after that.   
  
An hour and a half later, Benny was parking his truck again. They had checked every motel and any other place someone might stay at in town and surrounding it, but they had come up with nothing. The older man's lips were turned into a tight, angry line, while Dean seemed disappointed but not surprised. Defeated.   
  
“I have no idea where he could be, Dean. I'm sorry.”   
  
“It's not your fault, Benny. It's... someone had to be lying. He said he'd be nearby, and if he said so then it's true.”   
  
Benny sighed deeply. “Well, at least we can still get the order done, and then we'll take care of the rest. I phoned Victor this morning and it can be done this afternoon.” He patted Dean's leg in a comforting gesture and smiled a little at him. “I'll leave you at Lizzie's and then I can get a couple hours of work done. I'll come for you later, alright?”   
  
“Yeah, of course. Sorry for wasting your day” he whispered before leaning to kiss Benny's cheek. The other shifted a little to make their lips meet in a sweet kiss, and squeezed the back of Dean's neck. He rested his forehead against Dean's.   
  
“Hey, look at me, this wasn't wasted, and you got nothing to apologize for. Now go inside and rest for a while, relax a bit.”   
  
Dean shrugged a bit, as if he was only half-accepting Benny's words. He got out of the truck and headed to the bed and breakfast.   
  
Benny followed him with his eyes, a tight feeling of oppression in his chest. But what could he do except what they had talked about? With a frustrated grunt, he drove to the café and busied his mind with work.   
  
-0-o-0-o-0-   
  
Dean silently went upstairs to his room. Relax. He snorted, how was he expected to do that?   
  
He tried to empty his mind and use his nervous energy tidying him room, but after a while there was nothing else to do. So he did push-ups, sit-ups, anything he could think of to do in the space he had in the room. And when he was completely worn out, he took a shower.   
  
He found his phone ringing when he came out of it. He frowned a bit when he saw the number wasn't one he recognized, but he ended up answering.   
  
“Hello?"   
  
"Hello, kid" Alastair's voice drawled on the other side. The grin could be heard in his voice. "How has your morning gone?"   
  
Dean's breathing hitched, his stomach dropped. He would know that voice anywhere, it haunted him in his dreams.   
  
"How'd you get this number?"   
  
"Please, Deano, I've had it for a long time, since you got it. I didn't use it because that'd make you run faster, but now that I have the only things that matter to you with me, I guess that's not a danger, is it?”   
  
Dean huffed, full of hate, not saying anything for a long moment. "What do you want me to do?" he said quietly, voice just above a whisper.   
  
"I guess that depends on what you are willing to do. I suppose it will help to tell you that there's a lighter next to your mom's face right now?"   
  
"Anything!" Dean said quickly. "I'll do anything you want! Just please, please don't do anything to that picture. I'm begging you.”   
  
There was a pleased hum on the other side. "I knew I raised you to be a reasonable boy. How about we begin with not filling that order? After all, if you do, I'm afraid I'll be forced to leave with all of your things, and you'll never see them again. Neither of us want that, now do we?”   
  
"I swear. No restraining order, promise” Dean babbled. Pacing anxiously in his room, running a hand through his hair. “Is that it?”   
  
"I think that's enough for now. But that doesn't mean we gotta stop talking just yet." There was a brief pause on Alastair's words. "Dean? Hearing your voice so desperate after those years is doing things to me. Can you guess what?"   
  
“I have a pretty good idea” Dean replied dryly. He shuddered at the thought and wanted to hang up desperately, but he was afraid to do anything that might make Alastair angry. He didn't want anything to happen to his things.   
  
"I bet you do." The man's voice was gleeful "You have anything to say to that? Or would you rather wait until we are together again?"   
  
"I... I have a boyfriend..."   
  
Dean's voice was feeble, knowing his words meant nothing to the other man. He didn't care about anything but what he wanted, and Dean was already so afraid of what Alastair had in mind. It could be so many things, and each of them was the worst.   
  
"So? He isn't there with you right now, right? Or is he?”   
  
"No, he went to work."   
  
“Tell me, what kind of things does he do to you?"   
  
Dean bit his nail. "I don't really think it's your business what we do."   
  
"Back to rudeness again, Dean? Disappointing. Especially since it seemed like you had told him about the things we did. How come he gets in on the secrets and I don't?”   
  
"I didn't tell him about the... Sex stuff” Dean replied, pausing on the word sex, as if he was struggling not to call it something else “I just said you gave me the scars on my back."   
  
"Well, that's already something he knows about us. I want to know some of what he does to you Tell me, boy."   
  
Dean swallowed heavily. He didn't want to. He didn't want to share what he and Benny had had together, and specially, not to Alastair. But he was scared of upsetting the man and the consequences that'd have. He only doubted for a second.   
  
"We haven't gone all the way" he said, voice hoarse. "Just a blowjob and a rimjob each."   
  
"Oh, you haven't? That's adorable" Alastair cooed. During the call there had been a soft sound on the other side. It picked up now, and Dean thought he would be sick, but he didn't know what he could do but wait for the other to speak again.   
  
“Look, Deano, I'd love to stay and torment you for a little more, more, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to leave you there now.”   
  
“Good.”   
  
“I love you too. Remember, no order, nothing burned, huh?"   
  
"Yeah. Yeah, no order. Cross my heart" Dean said, nodding and anxiously running a hand through his hair.   
  
"Good boy, I'm proud of you. We'll talk again." Alastair drawled, then, with a smirk, hang up.   
  
The call ended then. The man looked at the screen of the phone for a few moments, then threw it on the bed. He paced his room up and down a few times, then run back to the phone and called Benny as fast as he could.   
  
"Dean" Benny greeted when he answered. His voice sounded mildly concerned. "I just got out of work. Anything happened?"   
  
"Yeah. Benny, he called me, told me that if I file that restraining order he'd burn the picture and run away with the rest." Dean explained quickly and nervously, biting down on his finger. "He said some other stuff too, but that's the most important.”   
  
There was silence on the other side for a second. Benny's voice sounded barely-controlled when he spoke, oozing anger. "I'll be right there. Wait five minutes."   
  
"You don't have to come if you're busy..."   
  
"Dean, I just told you that I'm out of work. I want to go there. Dean, I want to be with you now, really."   
  
"Okay, then come over. But- nevermind."   
  
Dean hung up before Benny could ask him what he'd been going to say. He felt bad for just hanging up on him, specially when he had sounded so concerned, but he was too much of a mess in the moment to really care about it.   
  
Little more than five minutes later, there was a knock on the door.   
  
"Dean, I'm coming in” Benny warned from the other side before carefully coming inside, inspecting his boyfriend's state before closing the door behind him. Dean watched him, but was unable to offer him a smile.   
  
“Hey.”   
  
“Hey” the older man greeted back, sitting in the bed beside him. He attempted to put his hand over Dean's, but the other pulled his hand away instinctively, roughly. He seemed to realize what he'd done just after he did it.   
  
“I'm sorry, it's just... It's been a long few days, and I don't really feel like being touched right now. Sorry.”   
  
Benny nodded, understanding, and left the bed to sit in a chair instead, giving Dean his space. Although his face didn't show it, he was a little hurt, not because Dean didn't want his touch, but because he couldn't comfort him. Not with words, not with his presence. He was as good as not there for Dean.   
  
“I think that he was touching himself. While we were on the phone.”   
  
Dean's words were quiet, and Benny felt a disgusted shudder run down his spine. He fisted his hands and, once more, he felt the urge to fucking kill the man and feed his body to wild animals. He took a deep breath, forcing himself to calm down so his voice wouldn't shake too much with anger when he next spoke.   
  
"Dean, did he force you to... you know, talk to him?"   
  
"He... Sorta. Not quite. He said that hearing me so desperate did 'things' to him. You know, hard. And then he wanted to know what you and I had done together.” His eyes stuck back blankly in the middle distance, as if he was trying to detach himself from what he was saying. “I didn't wanna tell him, but he would burn the picture if I didn't. So I had to."   
  
As he listened, Benny gritted his teeth and even started shaking with anger. He once again forced himself to breathe deeply and calm down. He hated it, not being able to do anything for Dean, not even knowing what could he tell him to make him feel better.   
  
"Dean, I'm sorry. I wish none of this was happening. The order was the best shot, but if he has your things... Unless you're willing to risk it?”   
  
A wide-eyed look from Dean told him all he needed to know. He shook his head, defeated.   
  
“Fuck, Dean, I don't know what to do. I just don't know. I'm sorry."   
  
“Benny, you got nothing to apologize for. There's nothing to be done, you can't apologize for not having any ideas when there's none to be had.”   
  
"Well, I'm not going to just sit here and watch that bastard ruin everything for the man I love either" Benny replied a bit too roughly. "Didn't he say anything that could help us locate him? Anything? There's gotta be something.”   
  
“Same as before” Dean answered with a shake of his head. “He'd be nearby, and that's all.”   
  
“If he's nearby after all, then we can find him, I must have missed something. I'm gonna go look for him again, alright?”   
  
“That won't do any good, Benny. Even if we find him, he's not gonna give my things back, he'll rather break them, just to see the look on my face. I'm not willing to risk that, ever. I don't want to go hunting him, I just want to sleep.”   
  
Benny looked like he was about to protest, but he cut himself and grunted a little, nodding reluctantly. “Alright, then. I'll leave you to sleep.”   
  
He was going to go give Dean a soft kiss goodbye, but he remembered Dean didn't want him touching him. So, with a sigh, he went to the door and closed it behind him after sending Dean one last concerned look.   
  
Afterwards, Dean stripped down to his underwear and put on a clean t-shirt before turning off the lights and crawling under the covers. Trying to keep his thoughts away from what was happening proved to be fruitless, and he could do nothing but shed a few tears into the bed until he fell asleep.   
  
Before that, though, he heard Benny talk to Elizabeth downstairs. Even from there he could feel the frustration and impotence coming off him. A few moments later, he heard the door being almost banged shut. The same happened to the door of the man's truck. Dean thought Benny's anger at the whole situation even in the sound his vehicle's engine made. He could do nothing but sigh and try to ignore the pain in his chest.   
  
-0-o-0-o-0-   
  
Dean woke up early in the morning, at 4 o'clock. He felt like he hadn't slept at all, and even more tired than before he fell asleep. He didn't get up, but he didn't try to fall asleep either, instead staring at the ceiling for a while, deep in thought.   
  
Half an hour later, he was ready to go. He left a note on his door for Elizabeth, saying he'd be visiting Benny and be back soon – a blatant lie. He slipped out the front door, he started walking down the road, heading to the first motel he and Benny had checked the day before.   
  
It was two and a half miles away, but as far as Dean was concerned it could be a state away. Once he reached the parking lot, he spent a few minutes looking at the cars. He then circled the building and got to the other side, the one that he and Benny hadn't seen when they came. There, it only took him a few moments to locate Alastair's car.   
  
He took a deep breath when he did, but his step was sure when he went to the door it was parked in front of. He banged loudly on it.   
  
He heard some grunting on the inside. A few moments later, the doorknob turned and the door opened, revealing a cranky-looking Alastair wearing nothing but his boxers. However, the crankiness and sleepiness faded from his face as soon as he saw who was on the other side, replaced by delight.   
  
“Dean, my dear boy.”   
  
His grin was met with a blank expression. “Just tell me what I need to do to get my things. Please.”   
  
"Of course, of course. Come in, why don't you?"   
  
As he spoke, Alastair reached out and grabbed Dean's wrist in an iron grip. He pulled him inside and closed the door after him.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

Dean was forced to sit on the bed, and a second after Alastair sat right next to him, their bodies so close they were touching, and Alastair's arm over Dean's shoulder. The younger man shivered with discomfort, which only made the other grin wider, and looked away.

“Just tell me what I have to do for you to give me my things back.”

By the time he finished speaking, Alastair was massaging Dean's shoulder, a light, gentle touch that was reminiscent of one not so gentle not that long ago. Dean's shivering worsened.

“If I'm not mistaken, you said you were willing to do anything for them, didn't you?”

The words were said right next to Dean's ear. He closed his eyes, breathed deeply and nodded slowly. He was still shaking, from fear, from having that man beside him once again, but he couldn't go. He didn't know what else he could do.

Alastair let go of Dean, only a few inches, and shrugged as if he didn't really care about it all.

“Steal from that Benny guy. Make sure he catches you.”

Dean opened his eyes and blinked at Alastair. He gritted his teeth but nodded.

“Alright, whatever you say. What do you want me to steal?”

"Money, if possible, but it doesn't really matter. I just want him to know that you were using him."

“And then you'll give me my things back?" Dean inquired after a brief pause, urgency clear in his voice.

"Then I'll wait for him to scream at you that he doesn't want to see you ever again, insult you, hurt you even. Then you'll have to come with me, because there'll be no one to protect you. And when we're finally back home you can have your things. What do you think?"

"I'm not going anywhere with you." Dean was now firmer than he had been this whole time. "I won't go."

"So you think he'll still protect you after catching you stealing from him? After he realizes you have been using him? I don't, to be honest" Alastair drawled, amused, as if he was struggling to not laugh at the whole situation. "And I repeat it, no one else is going to protect you. You'll be coming with me. And don't forget that I still have your things hidden. I've been looking at it, you father's face is particularly infuriating. I'd love to burn it off."

“Don't” Dean said immediately. “Please don't. I'll go, okay? Just... I'll go.”

“Good boy” Alastair practically purred, pleased. “I don't expect anything less than exact detail of how he reacts, hm?”

Dean nodded and stood up. He couldn't get to the door fast enough, and he slammed it shut behind him as soon as he could, blocking the sound of Alastair's light chuckle. He was met with the cold morning air, but he could breathe out there better than he could inside.

If only the thought of what he was going to do didn't send horrified shivers down his spine.

He started walking all the way down to Benny's house. From the motel that was three and a half miles. Once he was there, he let himself in with the spare key Benny had given him, knowing that the man would be gone to work, since it was about 11:00 am. But if he wasn't wrong about his schedule, he'd be back soon.

He sighed, starting to look around for somewhere Benny might keep money or anything valuable. By the time he found some cash, the older man was bound to be home any minute. It probably didn't make his act very believable, having some tears running down his cheeks, but he couldn't help himself. Benny was the best thing that had happened to him, after all, and he was about to break it.

Indeed, about five minutes later, he heard Benny parking his truck outside, and immediately after, the key turning in the lock and the door opening. Dean steeled himself and out a few bills in his pocket, then his hands back on the drawer, ready to be caught red-handed.

He heard a sudden halt in Benny's movements downstairs, probably having heard something. Next he took slow steps up the stairs, stopping right in front of his room, where Dean was. A second later, the door opened.

His scowl faded into confusion and surprise as soon as he saw who was there. “Dean? What are you doing here?”

“I-I...”

He turned around, money in hand, and trying hard to keep himself composed. Benny's eyes went from his distressed face, to the money in his hand, to the bills sticking out of his pockets, and back to his face. He started to speak, but stopped himself before saying anything. He licked his lips, staying silent for a few moments.

“Dean, what are you doing here?” he repeated his question in a much quieter tone.

Dean looked away from Benny, not able to look at him. He was quiet for a long moment. “Taking your money.”

"I can see that" the other replied dryly. "Care to tell me why?"

Dean swallowed thickly, looking back at Benny. He had to options now, and he didn't have a clue which one to choose. But to continue and finish breaking what he had built with Benny... he couldn't do it. He just didn't have it in himself.

"Alastair told me to. He wanted you to see me stealing from you so you'd think I was using you all along.”

For a second, Benny didn't say anything, carefully studying Dean's face, and he feared the worst. But his eyes seemed to soften a bit when they went through the faint traces of tears on his cheeks.

“He blackmailed you?”

“Yeah” Dean nodded. “He wanted me to steal from you and make you angry. Then you'd yell at me something like 'I never want to see you again', so I'd have to go with him 'cause no one'd be protecting me, and then he'd give me my things. I don't know what to do, Benny, I'm sorry.”

It had taken him a bit of effort, but once he started talking he couldn't stop. Benny's face remained serious, but soon enough in broke down into compassion and he stepped towards Dean.

“Dean, Dean, you should have come straight to me” he said as he put his hands on Dean's shoulders gently. “Don't worry, Dean, it's OK. I'm not gonna lie and say I don't care, but I understand he put you in a difficult choice, didn't he?”

Instead of answering, Dean took the money from his pocket and threw it back on Benny's dresser, along with the money in his hand.

“I gotta find out where he's hiding them, Benny. I can't go with him.”

“And you won't” Benny assured, as he stepped back to collect the money and put it away safely. “You know where he is, then.”

"Yeah, that first motel. Yesterday I thought the owner was kinda acting weird, so I went back to check this morning."

"If we know where he is, then we just go there, force him to give your things back, get the order ready and get rid off him for once. No need for more complication."

"He hid my stuff, Benny” Dean huffed frustrated. “If we wanted to find it, we'd probably have to fucking torture it out of him."

"Not an ugly prospect" Benny replied easily.

"I know it's what he deserves, but I won't let you stoop to his level. Either of us."

Benny didn't look too pleased, but nonetheless nodded. "Well, then we'll make him believe this worked, that I've kicked you out. Convince him to show you your things, and then I come in before he can do anything. That okay with you?”

"Okay, I'll trick him” Dean nodded after thinking about it for a moment. “I'm gonna need three favors from you, though."

Benny sat on the bed and crossed his arms, looking attentively at the younger man. "Go ahead, I'm listening."

“Look, Alastair's a nasty son of a bitch, he's a bastard, but he's also smart. He's not gonna be easy to fool." Dean paced a little in front of Benny, slightly nervous.

"To make this believable, I'm gonna need two things, and an extra thing for me to get out safe. First, I'm gonna need to borrow some of that money to show him that I did what he asked. To keep me safe I'll need a weapon. A knife, gun, I don't really care. Something. And the last thing.... You're not gonna like it."

"I don't like having you near him at all" the man grunted in reply. "But if you wanna do it, I guess it's the best chance we have to get everything, you and your things. I'm willing to give you money, and I wouldn't have let you go in without a weapon. Go on."

"I need you to punch me in the face. Just once. He doesn't know you well enough to know you'd never hit me, and it'll just make him feel more validated and right. I need his pride to be inflated so he won't notice something off."

Benny blinked at him. "No" he stated simply.

Dean huffed and rolled his eyes. "If you don't do it, I'll just get somebody else to. Just one good lick to the side of my face, I'll be fine, c'mon."

"Dean" Benny started, standing up and raising his hands, "think about it. I couldn't hit you, you got away from me. If I had put my hands on you, I would have taken the money back."

"Good point” Dean admitted. “He needs to know you caught me, though, so I'll leave the money. Punch me."

"You're very fast" Benny went on, voice firm, "and you already know this house. Dean, take the money."

“Fine, I'll just go ask someone else.”

“Damn, Dean, come back” Benny cursed, since the other had started walking out of the room. He went to him and pulled his shoulder. “You win, I'll do it. But know that I hate it.”

Dean turned and nodded. “I know. And thank you. I'm ready when you are.”

Benny grunted again. He gritted his teeth, closed his fist and raised it, but he stopped himself just before the hit connected. He breathed deeply and tried again, with the same outcome. He cursed and turned around, walking a few steps away.

"Fuck. Just give me a moment, man."

Dean's expression froze and slowly became a slightly sad one. He sighed, hating himself a little for having to ask this of Benny. “Yeah, that's okay. Take your time.”

A minute later, Benny turned back to Dean. His lips were pursed tightly and his eyes hardened. Without any warning, his fist moved directly to Dean's face, hitting just hard enough to leave a bruise in a few minutes. Dean staggered back, bringing his hand to the point where Benny's punch had connected.

Before he had even finished striking, Benny was already moving forward to catch Dean. He held his face gently, inspecting the hitted zone attentively.

“I'm fine, Benny” Dean assured. “I'm sorry for asking you that.”

"Well, it's gonna bruise” Benny commented dryly, ignoring Dean. “But not too much. Don't expect me to do it again.”

“I won't ask you, I promise” Dean assured shaking his head. He allowed Benny to inspect his face for a few more moments. He decided it was better not to say that he was fine, because he'd had a lot worse. “It's no big deal, alright? I’ll be fine.”

Benny tried to smile weakly at him, but didn't quite manage to. “Alright. But let me worry about you like the big sap I am, please.”

“Right. You can always make it up to me later if you feel bad” Dean said, smiling and giving Benny a quick kiss, winking at him afterwards. “Now, do you have a gun or something I can take?”

Benny nodded and reluctantly let go of Dean. He turned to a drawer, and opening it revealed the gun he had warned Dean about back when they first met. It took a second of hesitation, but he handed it to Dean, who took it carefully.

"Don't worry, I know how to use it” the younger man said to soothe Benny. He offered to show Benny how he took it apart and put it back together in front of him to show him he knew what he was doing and where the safety was, and Benny agreed that's make him feel better.

Dean went to the kitchen, followed by Benny, who watched him attentively, and admittedly impressed, as he unloaded the gun and took the pieces apart, laying them out neatly on the table. Once that was done, he started putting it back together with ease and reloaded it. Next he held up the gun and turned it to the side, clicking the safety off and back on again.

Benny commented that it did indeed calm him down, seeing Dean do that. What he didn't say, but Dean felt nonetheless, was that he was wondering where exactly Dean had learned all of that.

Dean smirked and leaned forward to kiss Benny gently. Then he pulled away and stuck the gun in the back of his jeans, palming it to make sure it was safe.

“I...” He licked his lips, looking down and back up at Benny-He took a deep breath. “I love you.”

Benny's eyes widened for a fraction of second. It was the first time Dean said that, with those exact words. A moment later, he was grinning widely, and held Dean's face lovingly as he leaned to press their lips together again.

“I'll be back before you know it, okay?” Dean assured when they parted, reaching for Benny's hand and squeezing. “You stay here. I don't want you near him.”

“None of that bullshit, Dean” Benny replied firmly, huffing and shaking his head. “I'm gonna go with you. I'll stay far away enough for him not to notice me, but if things go bad I'll be in in a second. I'm not gonna change my mind.”

Dean started to argue, but Benny grunted and glared at him. Dean could only hold his gaze for a few moments before giving in and nodding with a sigh. He followed Benny out to the truck, and hopped into the passenger's seat.

“I'm nervous.”

“So am I” Benny replied, failing to smile at him reassuringly. “But it will go alright. You've got a gun, I'm gonna be nearby and I think he's too smug to expect any kind of trick. Although, of course, I'd rather you not do it at all. But you're resolute, aren't you?”

“I am” Dean answered firmly, although he had to take deep, calming breaths the whole ride.

The truck stopped when they were more or less five minutes away from the motel. Dean was supposed to get down there and walk the rest of the way, so Alastair wouldn't detect Benny, who would follow in a couple minutes. However, the older man didn't unlock the doors, but kept looking silently at the road, knuckles white.

"Dean, if he finds out... Will he hurt you? Really hurt you?"

“He might. It's hard to say with him.”

A long silence followed. Benny swallowed hard, still looking up ahead.

"You know what? Forget this. It's stupid, we'll just call the police and tell them he stole from you. It might take a couple hours, but no one will be in danger that way. I don't care what you think, Dean, he's not immune to law.”

"He doesn't care if I get my stuff back or not, Benny. If we call the police he'll never tell anyone where he put it. I have to do this."

"You don't” Benny almost shouted. His hand made its way to Dean's wrist. His grip was tight at first, but he loosened it after realizing that. “He'll have to tell them, Dean."

Dean narrowed his eyes and almost snarled. “I don't think you get it. He won't tell them. He doesn't have to, either. He has the right to remain silent, plead the 5th, whatever. And even if it wasn't the case, he'd rather go to prison than giving up to me. It's how he is.”

"Well, then, you gonna have to do without those things, Dean. I just... I can't allow you to go in there with him. I just can't.”

“Benny, stop that. It's not your call” Dean grunted, leaning to Benny and staring at him in the eye, not looking away for a second. Benny held his gaze, gritting his teeth. Tension filled the car, and for a minute neither did anything but challenge each other with their gaze.

Eventually, though, Benny gave in, or he saw something in Dean's eyes that made him change his mind. He sighed, looked back to the road, knuckles white and almost shaking with frustration.

“Just be careful” he muttered, barely audible. “Please, Dean, promise me that.”

Dean nodded, eyes softening a bit. “I will.”

He got down the vehicle then, after having kissed Benny gently. He had to even out his breathing as he walked, telling himself that everything would be fine. Soon after, he was out of Benny's sight.

Some minutes later, Benny started the engine and got the car moving again. He got in the parking lot, ignoring the couple people there, and headed to the door Dean had told him was Alastair's. He got out of his truck and contemplated it for a few minutes.

He shook his head and suppressed the need to slam in right then. Instead, he leaned against his truck, arms crossed, eyes fixed on the door. He waited for any indication that he might be needed inside, and hoped he didn't eventually regret any of this.


	10. Chapter 10

"I did what you asked."

Dean's voice was firm, but his eyes were directed anywhere in the room but at Alastair, and his hands were shuffled awkwardly into his pocket, as if he didn't know what to do with them. The other man, looking at him with interest, approached him and pulled one hand out of his pocket, inspecting the bruise there.

"How did he react?"

"Punched me, told me to get out. I didn't get out with the money."

“How does it feel, kid?” The smile on Alastair's lips was cruel and gave away just how blissed he felt. Dean squirmed but did nothing as Alastair snaked his arm around him and rested his chin on his head.

"Hurts” was the muttered answer.

"You should have known he didn't really care about you. He wouldn't have hurt you, if he did."

"You're right."

Dean knew those were two words that Alastair liked to hear very much. He was further reminded of that when the man's grin grew wider.

“I'm always right, kid. You should know that by now."

"I know. But I really thought he cared about me” Dean whispered lowly. It might have been sadness, it might have been sheer fear. As far as Alastair was concerned, Dean was going to let him believe it was both.

Alastair nodded and took them to the bed, making Dean sit down beside him. Dean tried to keep some space between them, but the arm around his shoulders wouldn't let him go too far away.

"What are you going to do now, Dean?" Alastair inquired in his sing-song tone.

“I don't know. I don't know what I can do.”

"You know, there's no one who will fight for you right now” the man lisped gleefully. “And here you are, in a closed room with me. Tell me, what would stop me from taking you back?"

There was a couple beats between the question and the answer. Despite his hesitance, Dean's voice was quiet, but firm.

“I could."

Alastair sneered and raised his eyebrow, his eyes positively shining with amusement. "You will stop me? Then why are you here at all?"

“I-!”

Dean wanted to scream at Alastair, beat him, tell him that he had no power over him anymore. He shook his head and clenched his fists, forcing himself to calm down. Alastair still had his things in his power, after all, and he wouldn't let a little bit of taunting stop him from recovering them.

"I... I could, if I wanted to. But if you give me my things, I'll do whatever you want. I promise."

Alastair narrowed his eyes, noticing something off Dean. It had been a long time since he had had Dean in his power, but he had never been one to give up easily, and what he had seen in the last few days showed him that he had become firmer, stronger. Whatever was on Dean's mind, it definitely didn't match his words. He didn't let his face show his thoughts, though, and he tightened his grip around Dean's shoulders.

"Can I see my things before we go?” Dean insisted after a few seconds of tense silence.

"I did say that once we got home, didn't I? I can't have you taking it and running away."

Dean laughed a little bitterly, nearly proud of his acting skills. "And go where? I just think it's fair that I should know you actually have them before we go. I just want to see them."

Alastair stood then, walked away a few steps. He turned back to Dean, who was just thankful not to have the man's arm over him anymore. "You actually think I would get rid of them? My instrument against you? You're smarter than that, kid. But fair is fair. Here you go"

He put his hand inside his pocket and it came out with a picture between his fingers. Dean's heart jumped a little when he saw the picture. It was fine. Alastair showed it to Dean for a second and put it back in its place in his pocket.

But Dean now knew it was there. He slowly stood up and put his hand behind him, drawing out his gun, turning of the safety and pointing it at Alastair. The man snorted, not looking the least bit afraid or shocked.

"Dean, Dean, Dean" he mused, his voice the same a father would use with a stubborn kid. "You're always giving me so much trouble."

Dean cocked the gun, face unchanging, steeled. "Do you think I won't shoot you?"

"Maybe you would, maybe you wouldn't. Not only would you risk Benny not looking at you the same ever again, but there's nothing legal you got against me right now. Not on paper, at least. You would go to jail. And Benny would go to jail too, since I suppose he's helped you with this.”

“You're not guilt free, Alastair.. You've got theft and blackmail under your belt. Not as bad as shooting somebody, granted... But it's something."

Alastair continued as if Dean had said nothing. “As for your things, it's just as likely that you brought them here yourself as an excuse to assault me. And if all that's not convincing enough, what tells you that the box is here with me too?"

Dean felt a pang at the mention of his box, but he decided there was a more pressing matter in that exact moment. “That's nothing the police won't figure out asking around for a bit.”

"Is that what you think?" Alastair inquired, stepping ahead, the ever-present smile growing a hint. "Do you honestly think that anything you say will help you with a judge? Have you forgotten I have some connections, Dean? That you would be completely screwed if you hurt me?" He gave another step. "He will be, too. He's given you plenty of things, as far as I've seen, and you're going to ruin his life for a picture. Selfish as always." There was a shine in his eyes, one that wasn't amusement but something different. "Just like I always knew you were. I'm proud of you, my son."

Dean sneered, but there was a shaking to his body, and doubt to his voice. "I'm not... I'm nothing like you! Just let me have my things and I'll be outta your way."

"The thing is, Dean, I don't want you out of my way."

Then, taking advantage of that little moment of hesitation, in one swift movement Alastair's hands were around Dean's ankles, forcing the gun away from him. After a moment of struggling, Alastair managed to yank the gun out of Dean's hands and he threw it away after putting the safety on.

Dean called out in surprise, trying to reach back for the gun, but it was too late. Alastair charged at him with all his strength and Dean went down fast.

He wasn't sure why he had expected any other outcome. He would never win again Alastair and he should've known it.

Once he had his bearings, Dean started fighting back as hard as he could, punching and kicking at any part of the man he could reach.

"Benny!" He yelled as loud as he could.

Bare seconds later, the sound of the man trying and failing to open the door from outside could be heard clearly in the room.

"Damn! You bastard, leave him right now! Open this fucking door!"

Alastair cursed lowly as he put his hands over Dean's mouth, trying to silence him. Dean tried to shake his hand away to no avail. Instead he opened his mouth as much as he could and bit down hard on Alastair's hand, hard enough to draw blood.

Alastair let out a short scream and retreated his hand. A second later, he punched Dean, one time and two and three, with a mad grin on his face. Dean groaned, pushing with all his strength to flip them over, punching Alastair back, straight in the nose, making a satisfying crack underneath his fist.

"Dean! Please tell me you're alright!" said Benny's angry and panicked voice, as he kept slamming on the door.

"Okay for now!" Dean called back breathlessly, punching Alastair again and again. Alastair caught one of Dean's fists before it connected to his face. He was bloody and bruised and laughing. With a thrilled grin, he pushed Dean away and stood up. Dean cursed loudly as he tried to recover his balance. "Just go get the damn key, Benny!"

Benny was seemingly gone after that. Dean tackled Alastair's legs, and the man fell forward, but managing to wrap his arms around Dean's waist. Dean thrashed about, trying to throw the man off of him.

"Get the fuck off me!" He yelled, beating at Alastair's chest, who just laughed louder and louder the more violence he coaxed out of Dean.

They struggled for a few minutes, and then, the door opened. Alastair looked up to see a feral Benny glaring down at him. There was a moment of silence and quiet, broken when, with a scream, Benny charged forward and kicked Alastair's face with all his strength, sending him off Dean.

As soon as he was free, Dean scrambled up from the floor and came to stand beside Benny, who turned to him, worried. “Are you alright, Dean?” he asked frantically as he inspected the younger man.

“I'll be fine” Dean replied, swatting away Benny's hand. “Just a couple punches, Benny."

They both turned to Alastair, who was lying on the floor, bleeding and hurt, but nonetheless grinning. He propped himself up against the wall, tool the picture from his pocket, and took a moment to show it to Dean before viciously shredding it to pieces.

“No!” Dean screamed, panicked and vision briefly blurred. He charged at Alastair and started pummeling his face as the tears he couldn't refrain anymore rolled down his cheeks. Meanwhile, Alastair laughed loudly as he received the beating, interrupted by little gasps of pain and hits to his mouth.

Benny watched the scene coldly and decided to let Dean have this moment. As Dean let out his rage, Benny took a second to inspect the torn shreds. Perhaps it had a chance of being recomposed, but it would be extremely obvious it had been broken with the aim of ruining it. Dean's father's face would never be seen clearly again, nor his mother's. His baby brother was ripped in two, and Dean himself in three. All of them were alone, separated from the rest. Benny swallowed hard and felt a stinging in his eyes, but he composed himself before turning to the young man. He put a hand on his shoulders.

"Dean, we can still save everything else."

"What's the fucking point?" Dean yelled angrily, getting up and landing one hard kick to Alastair's ribs, another to his gut, and the hardest one yet to his crotch. "I hate you!"

Benny pushed Dean aside as gently as he could, which was very little. "Dean, believe me, I want to let you beat him to death, but he's the one who knows where everything else is."

Dean grunted and pushed Benny off. He approached Alastair again, just as furious as before. "Where are my things, you piece of shit?"

"Why would I tell you? Didn't you just say there was no point?" Alastair replied mockingly.

Benny snarled furiously and took Alastair from the floor, violently slamming him into a wall. "Look, you're going to tell him. You can choose the bad way or the worse way."

There was a tense silence in which no one spoke, Dean and Benny waiting for the other to say something. Instead, what broke the quiet was the sound of police sirens nearing. Dean's eyes widened. They must have made a lot of noise and someone called the police.

“Benny, let him go. This is gonna look bad enough as it is, and I don't want you getting in any more trouble than you're probably already in."

Benny huffed and let Alastair go, making the man fall to the floor. He said he'd go outside to talk to them and see if he could make the situation any better. He left, leaving a nervous Dean briefly alone with a beat up and weak, but conscious, Alastair.

The man was calm, even after everything that had just happened, and seemed even satisfied, in some sense, as he watched Benny go. He then let his gaze carefully regard Dean, who watched him to make sure he stayed there.

"You know, the other things are still whole" he commented absently.

"Where are they?"

"Now, where would the fun be if I just told you? Offer me something."

"Like what?” Dean sighed, crossing his arms over his chest. “What do you want?"

"Since I'm assuming the restraining order is inevitable at this point, then I don't want charges for attacking and stealing from you." He motioned languidly at the room's closet. "Your mom's necklace is on the second drawer from the top. Everything else is on different places. I want proof that you're going to do what I ask before I tell you more."

Hesitantly and distrusting, Dean slowly turned for him and went to the closet. He scrambled to the indicated drawer and indeed, pulled out his mom's necklace. He looked at it for a few moments, heart in a twist, and held it close to his chest.

"No charges, I swear. Just the restraining order." He promised, looking at the man with wide, desperate eyes, asking him to go on.

Alastair closed his eyes. "Nothing more until I have proof of it, kid."

Dean huffed, didn't say anything more, but crossed his arms and looked pensive. A minute later Benny came in, the live picture of seriousness, he approached Dean and took him a few steps away from Alastair, giving him their backs.

“One of the guys who came is a pal of mine. I've already told him about Alastair and he's the one who's gonna do the restraining order, but he's gonna have to take you too for a while, that's how things are. He'll ask you some questions and then let you go. This one, on the other hand" he added as he pointed to Alastair, disgust on his face, "won't be so lucky."

"I'm not pressing charges." Dean said quickly, glancing quickly at Alastair and then back at Benny. "Maybe the owner of the motel will want to press charges against him, or me, but I'm not pressing charges. Just the order.”

Benny frowned, first confused, the concerned. "Whatever he's told you, Dean, don't listen to him."

"The order is all I care about at this point, Benny. He said he'd tell me where the rest of my things are if I didn't press charges. And I'm not leaving this goddamn room without knowing where they are."

Benny remained silent, lips pursed and hard eyes flickering between Dean and the other. For almost a minute he didn't say anything, but then, finally, he nodded slowly, although still obviously displeased with the idea. Dean sighed in relief.

"Did you get all the.... All the pieces?"

Once again, it took Benny quite a few moments to react, but for a completely different reason.

"I did, yeah" he answered with a heavy sigh. "There might be something to be done, but Dean, don't expect anything. It's... pretty screwed up."

Dean nodded, biting his lower lip. That was what he had expected, but... hearing confirmation was hard. He stepped closer to Alastair and kicked him one more time.

"Where're my things?"

"I'm not telling you until you tell him" he said motioning to the police officer who was waiting a few steps out of the door, trying hard not to directly step in, "that there will be no charges. You think I'm stupid enough to think you can't present charges after I have told you where it is? So don't rush so much, kid."

"Benny, I'm not leaving this room until I find out where my things are."

The man nodded and called for his friend, Victor. The police seemed relieved he could finally step in and not break his favor to Benny. He stepped in front of Dean, looking at him sympathetically, and waited for him to speak.

He and Victor spoke and negotiated in a hushed tone for a few minutes while Benny watched over Alastair. Then, Victor went aside to speak to the man to speak a few things in legal terms with him. Alastair wasn't satisfied, but when he saw he was as safe as he could be, he pointed outside of the room.

"The box is in my car's trunk, under a false bottom. The key's hidden under the front seat."

Dean wasted no time going to check it, and he almost cried in relief when he had the box in his hand. He felt like he could finally breathe for the first time since they had been taken, and he was anxious to fill his lungs with fresh air. When he came back into the room, he found Benny, who had collected some other things other than the collar that Alastair had hidden in the room, in case he could use them as leverage against Dean.

Benny took the box and out everything inside, including the fragments of the picture. He surrounded Dean's shoulders with his arm and kissed his nape. Dean had to go with Victor as well, but Benny promise that as soon as he had taken Dean's things to his room he'd go pick him up from the station, and by that point he'd be free to go.

"Hey, brute" Alastair called Benny as he was led outside, hands cuffed on his back. "There's one thing I want to tell you."

He grinned one last time, a cruel expression as he saw Dean's face pale with horror.

"Did you know" he started slowly, rolling the words on his mouth, "that Dean once killed a kid? An innocent little boy. His name was Cyrus."


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all! Don't you just love drama? Yes? Us too.

Dean's face went completely pale. He wanted to yell at Alastair to stop talking, but he didn't manage to make his voice work. He didn't manage to turn to Benny to see his face, either; he had a feeling he wouldn't be able to stand it if he did. He would just have to run away without ever glancing backward.

There was shock in Benny's face, but it disappeared a second later. "I'm not going to believe anything you say" he said in a cold, controlled voice, although he had noticed the sudden panic in Dean's demeanor. "I hope this is the last time either of us see you."

"We will have to see about that” Alastair sneered. A second later, he held his head lower in some sort of acceptance. “But I don't think it will be anytime soon. And hey, brute, look at his face. He's afraid because what I said is true.”

Victor rolled his eyes, tired of the man, and got him going outside. Once he had secured Alastair in the police car, he went back inside.

“Boy, you gotta come as well” he said, with a much more kinder attitude.

“Yeah, I know. I don't have to sit in the back with him, though, do I?"

He visibly relaxed when the policeman shook his head. Before he went, Benny put his hand on his shoulder and Dean flinched, still ignoring his gaze, although Benny ignored it.

"So, what I said before. See you in a little while" he assured with a smile.

Dean managed to smile faintly at him but looked away quickly, not wanting to be with him for too long. Victor allowed him to go with him on the front seat, and menaced Alastair with 10 extra years of prison when he started making comments at Dean.

Once in the police station, he only had to answer a few questions the officer had for him, explaining what had been the situation exactly and how he found himself in that room with Alastair. He was respectful and polite, and in no time he was done and out. Victor was kind enough to drop him at the bed at breakfast.

“Thank you, Officer Henriksen” he said, smiling genuinely at him.

The man shook his head. “Don't you worry, kid. Benny had already told me so I knew what to expect. And about the order, it will be done in a matter of hours. You won't need to worry about him ever again. And tell Benny I said hi, couldn't properly say it before.”

Dean nodded and watched as the car went away. He spent a few more moments, breathed deeply, let the air out slowly, and headed into the house.

He briefly greeted Elizabeth, but blocked all of her concern with a few words and quickly ran upstairs to his room. A part of him felt guilty for hoping Benny wasn't there.

He was, though, and greeted Dean with a warm smile. He pointed sheepishly to one shelf, where Dean's stolen things were, along with the many shreds of the picture. Benny had clearly tried to place them so they were in the same position as they had been before, but there wasn't much to be done with them. Dean regarded it for a few minutes, biting his lower lip, before sighing heavily.

“Benny...”

Benny's brow creased, concerned with Dean's tone. ”Anything wrong, Dean? Were there problems at the police station?"

“No. No, everything was fine. Officer Henriksen was really nice" Dean assured quickly. "It's nothing. Just forget about it."

Benny stood up from the bed slowly and walked towards Dean. He reached to touch him, but he must have remembered how Dean reacted the last few times he tried to do so, so he stopped himself just before making contact, visibly awkward.

"Dean, you don't think I believe what he said, right?"

Dean looked at him with somber eyes, unable, or unwilling to speak. Benny attempted to crack a weak smile.

"Come on, Dean, you know I love you. Nothing he says can change that."

There was a moment of tense silence, in which Dean stared at Benny as if dumbstruck, before his eyes hardened and became rough.

"It doesn't matter to you if I've killed someone?"

The older man's smile dropped completely for a moment, then it came back, although more hesitating. Unsure. "It would. But he was lying, right? He couldn't be telling the truth. You can't have killed anyone, you can't have killed a kid."

Dean remained silent, looking at him and lips pursed. Some tears started to form in his eyes and he knew there was no stopping them. Benny's smile became even weaker.

"C'mon, Dean. Say something" he asked, almost shaking. "Tell me it's not true."

"It was an accident" Dean replied quietly, voice breaking as he tried to hold back his tears. "I-I didn't mean to."

For a second that nonetheless lasted forever, Benny was silent. His breathing had stopped completely and he was looking at Dean as if he didn't completely understand who the man in the room was. He closed his eyes and forced himself to start breathing again, taking a large gulp of air.

"I see" he muttered quietly as he looked down. He gave a step towards the door. "I think it might be better if I leave."

And then Dean knew. That was it. Benny would go home and he was going to end any kind of contact with Dean. He'd always known this moment would come, since Benny was far too good for someone as damaged and messed up as himself.

Still, it hurt.

"Benny..." he whispered, voice cracking as he started to panic.

Benny stopped, let out a shaky breath, still looking away. He was about to cry too, he realized. He felt a mix of pain, rage, disappointment and most of all sadness. He didn't know what he wanted more, if to run away from Dean or demand an explanation from him.

“I didn't mean to. I was little and it was an accident...” he started softly, carefully stepping forwards. He kept his eyes down. “I hate myself for it every day, I almost....” He paused, shook his head. “I'm not trying to make excuses, because I know it doesn't matter. I hate myself and I wish I'd died a long time ago."

With those words, it seemed like Benny's concern for Dean came back at full force. He swallowed hard and, after a moment of hesitation, went back to sit on the bed quietly. "Dean, tell me what happened. Please."

Dean went to sit on the chair, pulling his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them. He was silent for a few moments, putting himself together before attempting to speak in a little voice.

"It was when I was at an orphanage. I was about 8, and I'd been there so long. I don't think I shared a room with anybody that was there longer than a few months. But I'd been there four years, and I didn't... I don't know why nobody wanted me, but they didn't. There was a little boy that came and shared a room with me, and I could tell that he was gonna get adopted in no time or at least go to a foster family for a while, which was more than I ever had. He was younger than me, and smaller too. About 5, I guess. They didn't really care about keeping age groups together."

There was a pause in that moment. Dean was shaking a bit, and he had to take a deep, shaky breath before continuing.

"Then one day Cyrus came up and told me that there were at least two families and one man by himself looking to adopt downstairs. I knew I wouldn't have a chance, I..." He paused yet again, shook his head, closing his eyes to hold back his tears. "I'd been there so long, and I just wanted someone to pay attention to me. I just wanted a home. So I pushed him. Hard. He hit his head on the bedpost and I heard a crack, but I didn't even register it at the moment. I didn't even realize he wasn't awake, I just was desperate to get downstairs and catch someone's eye, so I left. Closed the door behind me and everything."

Dean had failed in keeping himself composed, and had a steady flow of tears coming down his face at that point. "Alastair realized how it had happened, and that's why he wanted me. And that was a pretty damn fitting punishment, don't you think? I..." He laughed, bitter and full of self-hatred. "I deserved everything he did to me, Benny. All of it.”

Benny was silent during Dean's explanation, and he remained so for a long while afterwards. His eyes were a strange mix of hardness and tears, although eventually the pity won, and the hardness went to a second plane although still there. He breathed in and out deeply, slowly, a few times before finally replying.

"You didn't know what would happen to him, Dean. I'm not saying it wasn't your fault, because it was. But you were a kid, a desperate kid, and god knows that kids aren't aware at all of what reality is.”

Dean shook his head. "It's doesn't matter, does it? He's fucking dead. He didn't get a chance to find his family and it's all my fucking fault.. I deserve to die. I've tried to die and I can't even do that right."

Benny ran a hand through his face. Once more, he was at a complete loss about what to do with Dean. He knew he had to get Dean to stop thinking like that, but it would be hard when he had just heard about how he had caused a five years old kid's death. If the situation was different, he'd give himself a couple days to calm down before facing Dean again.

Tough luck, though; he had to speak here and now.

"Dean, you don't deserve to die" he said firmly after a sigh. “Of that much I'm sure.”

"And who are you to decide that, Benny? I know you wanna leave, so go then."

Benny shook his head and stood up. He approached Dean and met his gaze, deeply affected with both sorrow and some sort of anger. He put his hand in his shoulder.

"I'm not going anywhere, Dean. Not until we have that covered at least."

Dean pulled away. "I'm not gonna try anything, Benny. I'm too much of a fuckin' coward. Just go."

Benny's eyes remained on Dean, a heavy presence, almost physical. After a few minutes of thick silence, though, something in his eyes gave in and he looked away, somehow defeated.

“Okay, Dean” he muttered lowly. “I love you, but... Fuck, you just dropped a bomb on me. I... I need a little time to sort out my ideas. I, huh, I guess I'll see you soon enough. Bye.”

He left Dean alone then. Dean waited until he heard the truck leaving before he went downstairs, straight to the liquor cabinet. He grabbed an unopened bottle of whiskey before going back to his room and locking the door behind him. He drank until he passed out.

-0-o-0-o-0-

Dean woke sometime in the night and immediately ran to the bathroom to vomit into the toilet. After a few minutes of that, he heard Elizabeth quietly knocking at his door. He sighed, getting up and going to slowly open the door and resting his head on the edge of it. Elizabeth was frowning at him with worry on her eyes,

"Dean. Benny said the deal with Alastair is over, but you look at you. What happened?"

Dean wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, still fairly drunk. "Benny found out I killed somebody 'n he left 'n I stole some of your whiskey 'n drank a bunch 'n then I threw up” he slurred vaguely. “'m sorry."

"You what?"

Elizabeth stepped back, her eyes widening in shock. Dean flinched immediately.

"I-it was 'n accident" Dean murmured, tears coming to his eyes again. "I was a kid, 'n I pushed him and he hit 'is head."

Elizabeth gave another involuntary step back. "Dean, you're drunk. You don't know what you're talking about. You must have had a nightmare."

"You can ask Benny. He knows." He paused, looking over Elizabeth's face carefully, his eyes gazed over. "I'll leave if y'want me to. Can't have a murderer on the payroll, right? 's bad for business."

Her eyes were still wide and with a hint of fear. She struggled to slow down her breathing.

"I'll talk to Benny in the morning. Now go to bed, Dean. I need you working in the morning."

Dean grunted a little in protest, then went completely silent and nodded. He pushed Elizabeth out of the room and dragged himself to the bed, where he fell flat. He was too drunk to be awake anyway, he decided, and fell asleep soon enough, fill of bitterness and self-hate.

His head throbbed in pain when he woke up the next morning, and he felt like he was going to throw up again. He got dressed and only paid half attention to his hygiene, going downstairs and greeting Elizabeth with a weak wave. He had a vague notion of having spoken to her last night, but he didn't know what he had said or if it had been a dream.

She smiled at him nervously and muttered a good morning before indicating him where to start working. Dean nodded and did so, frowning slightly. After the third time he caught her staring at him, he decided to ask.

"Hey, you okay?"

"Yes, of course I am. Why do you ask?"

"You just seem kinda nervous" Dean said, pausing as he thought. Then he remembered that brief moment last night, with Elizabeth at the other side of his door. He went pale and felt cold. He swallowed thickly. “Lizzie, look... Just... Just don't hate me, please. I don't know what I'd do if you did.”

Elizabeth looked away from him. "Just keep working" she murmured quietly. "We'll deal with everything else later."

Dean felt himself break all over again then. The two people who were nicest to him in the world were finally getting the memo that he was a real piece of shit. He guessed he'd have to move on sometime soon, but for now he kept himself together and nodded, going about his duties as normal.

Once everything was done, though, it was a different matter. He approached her slowly, eyes cast down, and even then he was awfully aware of her wary eyes on him.

"Lizzie, I... Do you want me to leave?"

"You don't have anywhere else to go, do you?"

"No. But I can find someplace to stay. I can find somewhere else to work, too, if it would make you feel better."

Elizabeth bit her lower lip, obviously at a loss about what to do. Dean's heart thumped loud in his ears as he waited for her to speak again.

"I'll talk to Benny later” she finally said. “I won't make a decision until then. In the meantime, just... Just do what you do every day, Dean. You're still working for me until you hear otherwise.”

“Yes, ma'am” Dean nodded, feeling his heart flutter in his chest, due to fear, to hope, he wasn't sure. Regardless of that, he turned around and left to find something else to do.

 

  
As soon as she saw herself alone, Elizabeth picked her phone out and quickly dialed Benny's number. It took two rings and a half for him to answer.

"Be quick, I'm at work.”

“Hello to you too” she replied automatically. She ran her hand through her hair, stopping and the top of her head and clenching. "Um. Has Dean talked to you about anything recently? About um..." She looked around to make sure he wasn't around to hear it. "About hurting someone?"

There was a second of electronic silence.

"He has. Lizzie, he, huh, he's not dangerous, if that's what you're worried about. I'm sure of that."

"You swear?" she asked after a sigh. "I mean, he seemed pretty upset about it, but that doesn't always mean anything, right?" She paused. "He was drinking last night, by the way. Like, a lot. You might want to talk to him about that."

"There's plenty of things I need to talk to him about" Benny replied, sounding tired "And Elizabeth, I swear. It, huh, it wasn't something he purposefully did. It was an accident, when he was a kid." As he spoke, Benny's tone changed a little, as if saying those words out loud made him think deeper about them.

Elizabeth was quiet for a long moment. "God, that would really fuck a person up, wouldn't it?" she mused.

"Yeah, a hell of a lot" Benny mused thoughtfully. "It definitely did with him, from what I saw last night."

"I almost told him to leave, and I thought he was gonna cry.” She shook her head, leaning against the reception counter. “Does he really not have anybody else?"

"He's alone, Lizzie. You and me, that's all he's got."

"Well we're his family now, then." She said without hesitation. "We have to take care of him, even if it's hard to look at him right now."

"You're right. He's still him, and this... this doesn't change that” Benny agreed. “Look, I have to go back to work, but tell Dean that, alright?"

"I will. Just remember what I said about talking to him about the drinking."

"I'll go see him as soon as I'm done here" Benny assured, and then he hung up.

-0-o-0-o-0-

Dean had tried to make himself busy and out of the way as long as possible, but he'd been so thorough that soon there was nothing for him to do. He idled around, trying to see if he could find anything else, but then Elizabeth approached him.

"Dean, do you have a moment?"

Dean slowly turned around, heart beating hard in his chest. He knew that this was going to be either really good or, much more likely, really bad. He didn't think he was completely ready for it. Elizabeth looked at him with concern and smiled weakly, nodding.

"Dean, you are staying here. You're not going anywhere."

Dean blinked at her, eyebrows furrowing after a moment. "I am?"

"You are” Elizabeth confirmed, smiling wider. “I've talked to Benny, and we think that you should stay. We'd like it if you did."

"Thank you" Dean said quietly after a while, when he managed to find his voice. "I... I'm sorry for taking the whiskey."

Elizabeth rolled her eyes but smiled fondly. "Don't worry about that, we have plenty more. And by the way, Benny said he'd pass by later, when he's done at work."

"Okay.” Dean bit at his thumbnail and nodded. “Did he sound mad?"

"No, not at all. I promise. He just wants to talk to you, he's a bit worried."

"Okay, that's fair. It's... Been a long few days for both of us, I think" Dean said, chuckling nervously. "Lizzie, do you think..." He took a breath. "Do you think he'll leave me?"

Elizabeth's eyes went wide open. "Dean, haven't you heard what I've just said? He cares a lot about you."

"Yeah, I know, but... I think what I told him really shook him up. Rightfully."

"Well, it would have shaken anyone, Dean, no doubt about that. But Benny loves you, that's certain."

"I know. I love him too.” Dean started biting on his lip nervously. “That's why I worry so much about messing up and losing him."

"Well, that's something only Benny himself can get out of your head. But you shouldn't be worried about it."

Dean hummed thoughtfully and started scratching at his stubble. He winced when he pressed on a bruise.

"Want me to have a look at that?"Elizabeth offered with a little frown, stepping forward.

"Huh? Oh, it's just a bruise. I think the scratches and stuff on my face have scabbed over, and there's not much you can do for a black eye, is there?" He shrugged lazily. "But I mean, if it would make you feel better, I guess it won't harm either."

Elizabeth came closer and held Dean's face up, searching it for wounds. She pursed her lips a bit as she did it.

"Most wounds are still open. We should disinfect them. Follow me."

She turned and headed to the bathroom. Dean sighed and followed her with a little smile.

"You know what I never told you?"

"Many things, I assume" she replied, looking for the first aid kit. She sat Dean on the toilet and started cleaning his wounds. He blushed a little.

"Well, yeah. But you know what I meant. When Benny found out that we'd been flirting he got jealous. He didn't say so, but you could see it in his face. I didn't realize it at the moment, but in hindsight...” He chuckled.

A little amused smile spread on Lizzie's face as well. "I can imagine. He got attached to you really fast, didn't he? Good luck he's not one to get too angry about those things, or I think he might have given me a silent treatment. He can be childish like that."

"Yeah, I think so too. I'm glad that didn't happen, though. I would've felt really bad for coming between you guys in any way, I know you're really close."

"Well, it didn't happen, didn't it? So no point in thinking about it. Now stay still for a while, will you?" She said, forcing his head still. He complained, but let her continue cleaning him. She finished a couple minutes later.

"Thanks, Lizzie" He said, smiling gratefully at her.

She smiled back and pulled him into a hug. Dean held tight to her, breathing deeply and feeling like maybe, just maybe, all of this wouldn't end in him suffocating. The hug probably lasted more than was necessary, but Dean wasn't going to complain about that.

That didn't mean he didn't want to make himself useful, though. Afterwards, he offered to clean the landscaping, which Elizabeth agreed was a good idea. He had been on it for a while when Elizabeth told him she was going for grocery shopping and would be back a while later, therefore leaving him alone in the house.

And only a couple minutes later, Benny arrived.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the last chapter of this story. We know it's been a long time since the last update and we really are sorry for that! Anyway, we hope you have enjoyed this fic, and we want to thank you for having dedicated some of your time to reading it :)

Benny headed towards the bed and breakfast as soon as he got out of work. He unconsciously tapped his fingers on the wheel as he drove and pursed his lips a bit. He couldn't help but wonder how Dean felt about the way in which he had reacted, or if he resented him for it. He pushed it out of his mind as he arrived. Whatever it'd be, he'd find out soon enough.

He opened the house with his own key and walked in. He frowned a little when he saw or heard no one. He walked around for a few moments.

“Dean? Lizzie? You two in here?”

“Hey, Benny.”

Benny turned around, startled. He was met with a sweaty Dean, plucking at the front of his shirt to get some air, and with hands, forearms and face covered with dirt and grime. Regardless of it all, he was smiling at Benny. The man smiled back, a bit awkwardly.

“Dean” he greeted, tone amiable. “How did you get so dirty?”

The younger man looked down at himself, a bit embarrassed. “Oh, pulling weeds, laying down the new garden soil, working on the landscaping, that sorta thing. Guess I should take a shower, huh?”

“You probably should, yeah. C'mon, let's go upstairs. Clean yourself up, I'll wait meanwhile.”

He went upstairs then, followed by Dean. He threw himself down on the bed as Dean locked himself up in the bathroom and sighed deeply. He listened as the water was turned on and imagined Dean under it, scrubbing and rubbing at his body. Dean's bed smelled of him, a scent Benny knew very well filling his nose. He didn't know how long he spent thinking about how he missed Dean and how he wasn't sure about how to say what he was going to say.

His thoughts were interrupted when the bathroom door opened and Dean appeared, in new, clean clothes. He was smiling but his anxiety was painfully clear. Benny sat up and patted the spot next to him, trying to reassure Dean with his expression. Dean complied, close enough to brush their arms, but not so close as to invade Benny's space.

"So?"

Benny gingerly took Dean's hands into his and caressed them with his thumb. He didn't look up as he spoke. “I'm not saying I'm going to forget about that immediately. It's pretty heavy stuff, Dean. But I want to go back to normal, put it behind us. I want you to stay with me.”

A bright, wide smile slowly made its way into Dean's face. He leaned over to kiss Benny's cheek, draping his arm over his shoulder. Immediately, Benny's arm snaked around Dean's shoulder and he sighed in relief, smiling too.

"I'm so glad, Benny, I was worried. So uh... I'm gonna let you set the pace."

"There's no pace. All I'm asking for is that you have some patience with me if sometime I spend too much time looking at you. It's gonna take some time to get fully used to the idea, but that's all. I promise.”

“I get it” Dean said with an understanding nod. “That I can handle.”

Benny gently kissed Dean's forehead, after which he laid down taking Dean with him, making the younger man end up on top of him. He let his hands run over Dean's shoulders comfortingly, letting him go through the fact that they would be okay, and then his hands slipped down to take Dean's between them. He brought them up and kissed them.

“Have you had your wounds taken care of?” he inquired in a soft whisper. Dean nodded.

“Yeah. Lizzie fixed 'em up for me."

“Good” Benny replied, kissing the man's forehead now. He paused for a second and then continued. “So, has this day been hard?”

“Kind of,” Dean mused, turning his head and scratching his stubble uncomfortably. “Not the hardest I've had, for sure, but... Definitely not a walk in the park either.”

“I figure. And I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you, huh?”

“Not exactly your fault, Benny. But I think it'd be nice to go out to the lake again this weekend if you feel like doing something sweet for me."

"Eager to have me in the water again, aren't you?” Benny teased with a smirk and a raised eyebrow. “I can do that. And since the tourist season's gonna be over in two weeks at most, how about you come to my house for a few days then? The weekends at least, when I can stay in bed all morning."

“Sounds good” Dean replied, leaning into Benny and kissing at his jaw. “Are you gonna do what you promised while we're on the boat?”

“I dunno, baby. I've told you I'd do plenty of stuff to you. You're gonna have to be a little bit more specific.”

“Mmmmm, I remember you mentioning something about locking me up in the cabin, hm? About you teasing me all night long and make me hoarse from screaming.”

Dean's voice was barely above a whisper and it made an aroused shudder run down Benny's spine and into his whole body. He cleared his throat a little and shifted to get them both on their sides, face to face and some distance between their bodies. However, he kept his arm on Dean, running up and down his body.

“Sounds pretty good to me. Sweet as peaches. How about Saturday, huh? Is that good with you? I know you've missed my impressive body, but you're gonna have to wait until then.”

Dean punched him playfully and Benny laughed warmly. Dean joined him with a chuckle, and soon comfortable silence fell between them. However, soon enough Benny started to go from relaxed to pensive, keeping his caresses on Dean's body. The other man didn't mention it, either, until Benny himself broke the silence.

“Victor phoned me this morning” he said slowly. “As far as we're concerned, Alastair's as good as dead."

He didn't know how he expected Dean to react exactly, but he guessed prolonged silence was to be expected. Dean said nothing, did nothing, for quite a few minutes, but then Benny felt how his lips, pressed against his neck, slowly turned upwards into a satisfied grin.

“Good.”

All the response from Benny was a hum, and after that a calm, thoughtful silence fell. Dean was heavy and warm above Benny, comforting. He was completely relaxed in Benny's arms, and soon enough he heard him start to snore softly, perhaps relieved, feeling actually safe and content for the first time in far too long. Benny couldn't help the smile that appeared on his lips, shifting a bit to make Dean more comfortable, and he found himself closing his own eyes as well.

-0-o-0-o-0-

Dean woke up about an hour later to the feeling of eyes on him. He stirred lazily and blinked his eyes open, smiling softly when he saw Benny watching him with a similar expression. He hummed contently.

"What're you lookin' at?"

"Your beautiful face. It's the best thing around to look at."

Dean huffed but wasn't able to hide his slight blush. "You're disgustingly sweet," he murmured.

"Nah, just telling the truth" Benny replied easily. He snuggled closer and left a kiss on his neck. "But maybe we should get moving, though. Lizzie's gonna think we're fucking at her place and I'll never hear the end of it."

Dean pouted and rolled on top of Benny. "No," he whined, long and miserable, making a rumbling laugh come from Benny's chest.

"Do I have to go back to calling you 'kid', baby boy? I will if I have to." Dean just grumbled unintelligibly and Benny rolled his eyes. “Come on, kid. If you're good I'll make dinner for you and my cousin. You like my food, right? Specially my meat,” he added wriggling his eyebrows.

That forced Dean to snort and open his eyes, finally getting out of bed and started to dress. “You're completely ridiculous. You better make a goddamn feast to make up for that.”

Benny followed his example. “I'd be hurt if you expected anything else” he commented easily. “Tell Lizzie I'm taking over her kitchen, cher.”

Five minutes later, Elizabeth stormed into the kitchen where an amused Benny was already getting to work. She had her lips pursed and her eyes narrowed in the clear sign of wounded pride, and she was followed by a smirking and entertained Dean.

“When are you gonna stop acting like you're the best cook here, Benny?”

“The day I'm not, which doesn't seem to have arrived yet.”

Elizabeth huffed and wasted no time getting to work beside Benny, starting her own dish. Benny snickered in amusement, his smile minimally mimicked by his cousin, and he turned briefly to Dean pointing at him with a spoon.

“You'll be the judge" he stated and a blink later was back into his duty. Dean sighed and rolled his eyes affectionately.  _ Of course I'll be the judge _ , he thought as he simply sat down on a stool and watched them work. It was basically one of those cooking shows, only he had the feeling he'd have the loser at his neck.

Both of them went for almost obnoxiously traditional; forty minutes later Benny was presenting Dean with a proud gumbo, followed only a few minutes later by Lizzie's jambalaya. Nervous under both their gazes, Dean's lightly trembling hand took a spoon and took some of the gumbo first. He closed his eyes and moaned in satisfaction. After cleaning his mouth with a glass of water and trying the jambalaya, he had a similar reaction. Then he looked up at their expectant faces.

"I dunno, they're both really good..."

"Dean, you know there are  _ things _ I can give you other than food" Benny bribed, wriggling his eyebrows suggestively. Elizabeth rolled her eyes and sighed, and Dean snorted.

"You'd give them to me anyway. And now, just 'cause you tried cheating, I'm gonna say that Lizzie cooks like a hundred percent better than you do,” he said, childishly sticking his tongue out at Benny. A grinning Elizabeth did the same.

Benny made an indignant noise and took a hand to his heart dramatically. "You are dead to me, Winchester, you are."

"To be fair, Benny's a better hugger."

"The harm's already done, Dean. Don't try to fix it." He grabbed his dish all to himself and sat in a corner of the table, starting to eat, full of wounded pride. Elizabeth rolled her eyes and served Dean some of her food, pushing it towards him and he accepted it gladly.

They ate in silence for a few minutes, the ambiance calm and friendly, welcoming as each sunk into their own thoughts without it meaning ignoring the others. Eventually, Elizabeth was the one to break it in a casual tone.

"So Dean, we haven't talked about what you'll do when tourists stop coming by. You have anything on your mind?"

“I don't really know” he shrugged. “I guess it depends on who's hiring. I'll take what I can get. But when I do find it...” he added, a hint of doubt creeping into his voice as he faced Benny, “I thought I might stay with you? If that's OK.”

"There's a place for you at my place as long as you want it, you know that."

Benny was smiling bright and loving, and Dean found himself mirroring the expression. They reached out and brushed their fingers over the table. Elizabeth snorted.

"Get a room" she murmured.

"We plan on doing that, only not now. You know, we'd like to take our time and we both got work tomorrow morning."

“Dammit Benny,” she complained, hitting him in the arm as he laughed, “don't be gross. I don't want to puke on the table I eat on, so stop it or I'll kick you out.”

Benny just laughed, shrugging off her threat, and she stuck her tongue out at him. Dean found himself smiling, cheek resting on his hand as he watched the two of them banter familiarly. It sort of felt like a family. He felt at home. And the second he realized that, a rush of love for both Benny and Elizabeth ran through him and filled him whole, more intense and stronger than anything he'd felt before.

Ten minutes later, Benny stood up since it was his time to go. He held Dean lovingly just before going, nuzzling his neck.

“Will pick you up tomorrow afternoon” he suggested after pressing a soft kiss to his cheek. “And then we spend the whole weekend together. How's that sound?”

“Sounds amazing” Dean replied, voice as soft as Benny's. He leaned in for one more kiss, keeping his hands on Benny's shoulder until they fell when Benny reluctantly stepped back. He gave Dean one last smile and wink before going out the door. With a content sigh, Dean decided to get to clean the dishes

-0-o-0-o-0-

The time to be collected by Benny the next day couldn't come soon enough. By four o'clock, Dean had had his bag packed and ready for a whole hour, spending the rest of the time anxiously cleaning just to give himself something to do. Elizabeth was clearly grateful when Benny showed up, and just shoved Dean out the door before Benny could even come in, saying that he enjoy his little vacation, and to take his anxiety and sexual tension out of her face, all with a teasing smile on her face.

Dean bumped into Benny, who made a startled sound as he stepped back. Dean smiled at him bashfully as he adjusted his bag on his back, feeling the barest hint of a blush appear on his face.

“Hey there.”

“Hey there to you too.”

Dean fidgeted for a couple seconds, waiting for Benny to do something, but the man only offered him a god smile. “C'mon, the weekend only lasts so long!”

“You know, you're such a kid sometimes” Benny chuckled as he mussed Dean's hair. “You make me feel so old. But come on.”

“Yeah, come on” Dean replied, already heading to the car. “Gonna have a swim and then we're gonna have sex on the cabin. All the way.”

Benny laughed again, following. “No fooling around, do you?”

Dean winked but made no comments. They got inside the truck and stayed silent on the brief drive to Benny's house to pick some things up. They quickly got them – Dean's trunks, some food for the afternoon, suncream and such - and then they were back on the truck headed towards the lake.

“I got a present for you, by the way” Dean commented after a couple minutes.

“Mmmmm? I'm all ears.”

"Nope, you gotta wait until we're on the boat."

"Oh, so you told me just to have me growing impatient?" Benny asked with a raised eyebrow. "You're a bad boy, Dean. I'll have to punish you."

Dean pouted with exaggerated childishness. "Hey, I got you a present. Hardly makes me a bad boy.”

"No, you're not. You're a good boy. My very good boy. Still gonna punish you, though" he replied with a smirk and a nod. Dean whined softly and Benny laughed good-naturedly.

The trip to the like felt shorter than expected, and Benny grinned, thrilled when he saw Dean's eyes widen with excitement at the prospect of spending the afternoon there. The last time it'd been a quite enjoyable experience, for both of them, but he knew that it meant much more to Dean because it had been one of the few actually good experiences he'd had. Benny intended to make the list grow a lot in a very short time, starting with that very day.

He shut the door as he got out of the car. He nodded, satisfied when the fresh air hit his face. "Feels like forever since we were here, doesn't it?"

Dean hummed, "Feels more peaceful now."

They fumbled a bit with the door and the boat, and soon enough the engine was coming to life as Benny directed the boat to the center of the lake, relaxed and easy. Dean just looked at the water being disturbed as they passed by and move in waves behind them until they stopped moving at the center of the lake, the water rocking the boat back and forth gently.

"Aaaaah, yes" Benny commented happily. "This is it, Dean. Just us and the water, nothing else. Sometimes I think about taking a break from work, get a ton of food, and spend a whole week out here doing nothing but laze around.”

"You should do it. You deserve a break."

"Maybe I will, if you tag along. You and me here for a week, what do you think?"

“Sounds like a plan. You better make good on it.”

“Honey, you bet your ass I will.”

Dean came up to Benny and wrapped his arms around his neck, nuzzling into his neck and kissing it as Benny's arms went around his waist automatically.

“Now that you mention my ass...”

“Not wasting any time, are we?” Benny inquired with a raised eyebrow. Despite his mocking tone, he walked forward pushing Dean until the younger man had his back against the cabin, Benny's arms at both sides of Dean's head. Benny smirked hungrily, like a predator, his face an inch away from Dean's, letting their breaths mix. Dean smirked back, his own more playful than anything, and ducked his head just enough to brush their lips.

Benny grunted and closed what was left of the distance between them, almost slamming Dean against the wall and hungrily diving into his mouth. Dean made a surprised sound, but melted into Benny's arms, opening his mouth a little more to allow Benny more access. Grunting again, a low, rumbling sound, Benny moved down and licked up from Dean's collarbone to his jaw.

Dean let out a breathy sigh, hands moving to grip Benny's biceps. "Should take this inside.”

Benny hummed in agreement. Without moving his face, his hand blindly looked for the door. When he opened it, he grabbed Dean and turned around, making him go in without having to stop kissing him. A few more steps and they were falling on the mattress. He rolled onto his back, hands caressing Dean's and grabbing his ass.

Dean moaned quietly, reaching back and sliding Benny's fingers under the waist of his jeans. Benny chuckled into the kiss as he slipped his hands further inside and squeezed hard. He moved down and started nibbling on Dean's jawline. Dean sighed happily in response and moved his hands under the hem of Benny's t-shirt.

"Too many clothes."

"Agreed.”

Benny moved aside to yank his shirt off, kicked his boots and socks off and unfastened his pants, letting Dean help him pull them off as the younger man kicked off his own shoes. His pants followed suit and he went back to kissing Benny, who eagerly took him in as his hands slipped under Dean's shirt, running up and down his back for a few moments before getting it out of the way too and kissing down the other's chest. He caught a nipple between his teeth and pulled at it gently, but soon decided he would rather keep kissing his way down to Dean's stomach, enjoying himself as he lavished the soft but firm skin. Over him, Dean started squirming with impatience.

“Benny, please” he whined, reaching down to Benny, who let himself be brought up to meet Dean's lips with his own. He let his hands run down Dean's body and slip into his boxers. Dean helped him shuffle them off as he left kisses on his jaw.

“Your turn, big guy” he muttered once they were off. Benny moved a little away and fell on his back. He crossed his arms beneath his head and raised his hips.

“All yours to unpack. My gift to you."

Dean rolled his eyes, but happily slid down Benny's body until he was mouthing over his clothed cock, cupping his balls gently and squeezing. He saw Benny throw his head back and bit his lip to hold back a moan. His hand wrapped around Dean's head hair and pressed him closer to his groin, so Dean responded by freeing his cock from the cloth and slowly licking the head; Benny cursed loudly and threw his head back again, Dean smirked proudly.

He sucked the head into his mouth and swirled his tongue around it, but only a few times. Benny grunted in complaint when he pulled away and tackled Dean, getting once again on top of him. He assaulted his mouth with rough kisses and bites. His hand wrapped around Dean's cock and he started stroking slowly, so very, very slowly.

“Damn, Benny” Dean whimpered softly. “Go faster.”

"I don't think so. What do you say, baby?”

“Go faster,  _ please _ .”

"That's my good boy."

Benny kept stroking, each movement a little bit faster, until he was going as fast as he could and his movements made slick noises. Dean writhed pleased under him, and smirking naughtily, Benny stopped. However, before Dean had time to complain, he reached for Dean's ass, one hand on each cheek and slapping simultaneously.

“Wait a second, baby” he muttered pressing a quick kiss to Dean's brow. He went outside and came back a second later, their bag in hand, and threw it to a corner after picking up the lube from it. He poured it in his hand as he walked to the bed, where Dean was waiting in position, all fours and ass up. Benny pressed a kiss to a cheek before he slipped the first finger in, slow and careful. He got up to the first knuckle and paused.

"You tell me when you need a little break, alright?" he muttered, and Dean nodded as he closed his eyes and breathed heavily through the stretch. After getting to the second knuckle and giving Dean a moment to adjust, he started slowly moving in and out, and soon after the second finger went in. He started moving them in tandem, scissoring them, and moved his body forward. He pressed his chest against Dean's back, panting his hot breath on his ear.

Dean moaned quietly, his eyes falling closed.

"Fuck, Benny."

"That's the idea" Benny commented easily, slowly adding a third finger. He licked Dean's ear and nibbled on it, then kissed his nape. Dean moaned wantonly.

"If you could just... A little to the right."

"Magic word, Dean" Benny crooned.

Dean growled in frustration, although the desperate whine mixed in it kind of ruined the effect. "Please, Benny. Just please do it."

"Your wishes are orders to me, my love." Benny laughed lightly and then started an onslaught on the point. Under him, Dean bucked and cursed loudly, his hands fisting in the sheets

"Shit, s-slow down a little or I'll come before you even get inside!"

"You know, I'm more than fully capable of having you come two or three times in a row" the other commented casually, but he did slow down. "But maybe we should leave the more hardcore sex for other time, huh? I think you're in need of some simple and caring quality bear lovin'”

"Yes, please. Just want simple this time. Just you."

Benny hummed happily and pressed a series of kisses to Dean's nape, moving his fingers a few more times before finally stopping. He took them out and inspected Dean's asshole, spreading his cheeks

"What do you think? Do you need more stretching?"

“N-No. That's enough, I think. I just wanna have you already.”

Benny hummed, pleased and flattered, but made no comment. He grabbed a condom and rolled it in himself, pouring and spreading lube over it afterwards. Once he was well coated, he positioned himself behind Dean, placed the head of his dick against Dean's entrance and grabbed Dean's hips, digging his fingers in. But just before he pushed in, Dean called out for him.

“Wait,” he said, and Benny froze, looking at Dean with worried eyes. A shake of Dean's head reassured him he wasn't having second thoughts.

"Can we do this missionary, please? I wanna see your face."

“My, Dean, you're a romantic” Benny teased as he moved back, enough to gently roll Dean onto his back and position himself on top of him. “I think it's sweet.”

He loomed over Dean and gave him a long, open mouthed kiss which Dean met happily, placing his hands on either side of Benny's face. He pressed their chests together and his hands traced down Dean's sides to his legs, which he hauled up, around his hips. Then he slipped between their bodies, took himself in hand, and aligned with Dean's hole. He deepened the kiss, licking the inside of Dean's mouth, and pushed in. He entered easily enough, and he groaned as he kept going until his balls touched Dean's skin.

He buried his face on Dean's neck, and after a minute or so started rocking back and forth, pulling halfway out and then slamming back in with a loud grunt, making Dean moan loudly and grip his biceps as he locked his legs around his waist. Benny repeated the motion hastily, unable to get enough.

"I was right, Dean, you feel so good" Benny moaned breathily against Dean's skin. He changed the angle, trying to find a way to hit Dean's prostate better. It didn't take him long to find it, if the way Dean shook and gasped an 'oh, fuck' under him was any indication. Benny smirked and focused his attention on that spot. He felt Dean around him, his heat, his tightness, his breathing over his head and their skin slapping together. He crossed his arms under Dean's body, making his chest stand out a bit, and he licked the sweat on his skin. Dean pulled at his hair.

"God, Benny..."

Benny smirked up at him and leaned for a kiss. "How are you holding up, baby?"

"Mmm... Good. I'm good."

Dean took Benny's face in his hands and pulling him in for another kiss. Benny returned it eagerly as he allowed himself to quicken the pace a bit, moaning and grunting and getting the same from Dean. His hand settled on Dean's chest and caressed the way down to his dick. He grabbed it and chuckled at Dean's gasp, started pumping slowly, increasing the pace every few seconds. After a minute, Dean's eyes clenched shut and he raked his fingernails down Benny's back.

"Don't... Fuck, don't think I'm gonna l-last much longer, Benny."

Benny laughed and straightened back, pulling Dean up with him. He rested his back against the wall and with his hand held Dean in pace, thrusting his hips upward. He looked at Dean in the eyes heatedly, mouth open and panting, grinning when he felt Dean move his hips and tandem with his own.

They lasted like that for a few more minutes, and then, just as Dean pulled closer for a sloppy kiss, Benny's movements started to become erratic and faster. Soon enough, Dean was clenching around him as he came with a shout muffled into Benny's neck. Benny followed his lead moments later. Suddenly they were still, hiding their faces in one another, and Benny's arms tightened around Dean. Benny started peppering kisses to Dean's scalp, and then they fell on their sides on the mattress.

He lazily pulled out of Dean, and suddenly he was laughing. He pressed a slow, lazy kiss to a very receptive Dean, who smiled into it.

"Hope my ass is as nice as you dreamed."

"It was good enough." Benny laughed louder when Dean hit him in the shoulder, and placated him by taking hold of his wrist and kissing each of his knuckles. He pulled off his condom and tied it, threw it somewhere else, and just sighed happily before he started leaving soft kisses on Dean's shoulder. The younger man chuckled.

“I like it when you get sweet.”

“I'll have you know I'm always sweet as sugar, baby.”

“Mmmmm, not as sweet and loving as me.” Dean rolled on top of Benny, lying with his stomach flat against Benny's, and kissed him slowly as Benny hummed pleased. After a few sloppy kisses, Dean opened his heated eyes and smiled languidly. “Speaking of that, you wanna open your present now?”

“Mmmm, I'd say that'd be something as sweet as yourself, Dean.”

Dean gave him one more kiss and got up, going to his bag, rummaging through it for a moment and then coming back. Benny, who had sat up, watched curiously and accepted a box wrapped in newspapers a suddenly blushing Dean was offering him, scratching the back of his neck.

"If you think it's stupid or whatever, I can take it back."

"You're not taking anything back."

Benny inspected the box for a moment, turning it around, and then gently opened it. Inside, he found a leather bracelet with a simple pattern carved on it. On the inside, it read 'Always yours – Dean'.

Benny stayed silent under Dean's sheepish and nervous smile. He turned the bracelet in his fingers, inspecting every little detail on it. It was quality leather, carefully worked on, and it surely was quite expensive for Dean's paycheck at Lizzie's. For him, it was a lot.

Still saying nothing, Benny reached for Dean and pulled him into a passionate kiss. Dean allowed him, smiling into his lips, immensely satisfied that Benny seemed to like his present.

"I have to get you something like this" Benny commented softly when they separated, pressing his forehead against Dean's.

"No you don't. That's my gift to you for helping me and seeing things in me that no one ever has before.”

"Dean, maybe you haven't realized this, but you've given me a lot too. I was at a very low point when I met you, you helped me through it, and you've changed my life for the better just by being in it. So yeah, I'm gonna get you something too."

Dean blushed and hid his face in Benny's neck, but the older man could feel his smile against his skin. A few moments after, he stood up again and retrieved another box from his bag, although his expression was much more mischievous when he offered it to Benny, who took it under a curious gaze. He stared at the butt plug he found in his hands, and the broke out in loud laughter as he set it aside and wrapped Dean in his arms for yet another kiss, laughing into it.

“That might come in handy for round two in a few minutes. It'll be quite the sight in your pert ass.”

Dean laughed too and mock-hit him, and then they both fell on their backs, still laughing and grinning at each other. Eventually, face toned down to a more serious but still smiling face, Benny reached out and let his fingers trace over Dean's face.

"I'm glad I found you."

"I'm glad you found me, too. You're the first good thing that's ever happened to me.”

Benny's smile faltered at that, but before Dean could take notice of it, he scooped closer and held Dean in his arms, kissing his head gently.

"But I won't be the last. I'll give my everything to make it so.”

And hearing Benny's words, Dean's heart leapt in his chest as he realized for the first time that that was probably true. That chapter of his life was the one when good things started to happen. And it'd be because of Benny. He tightened his hold on his lover even more and wished he could just melt into him.

"I love you, Benny. I'm gonna say it a lot of times, but I'd rather say it too much than not enough."

“I agree,” Benny whispered softly. “I'd rather say it too much, too. I love you.”


End file.
